My OCs Are Sooo Cool You Guys Don't Know What You're Missing. If You Could See The Show I'm Watching

"My son turned out fine"

sir your daughter writes microfiction about being dismembered and turned into an object by a pretty woman.

i sleep diagonally so i wake up to a dutch angle view of my ceiling symbolising my descent into madness

Idgaf about honor or tradition, if some other vampire tries to square up with me i’m not fucking around with claws, magic, or teeth, i am shooting you in the head repeatedly.

She wraps the leash around her hand and pulls me up to her.

"you know, it's really amazing how easy it is to mistake you for a human. From a distance, I mean. Once you're up close *she pulls me closer* the illusion is shattered, and it's obvious what you really are."

Sometimes when praying people will go "and cast all my period cramps onto satan" and IT FUCKING HURRTTTTS

what if i just. hansmkddnjckenskdns hngbgngmfndkdm krkrkfndkd jckssndmdnnxkcjxjdms

huge as fuck claims court. im suing you for one william dollars asshole

i am now accepting applications for "treacherous stooge"

they got rid of the classical elements & replaced it with something called the 'four harmonious insects' so now instead of fire, water, etc we have moth, spider, leech and worm.