I Needed A Hug. I Needed To Cry On Someone Else’s Lap. I Needed Someone To Shrug Off All This Hate

The thing is I know I’m not worthy of friendship, kindness, or even love... but you made me believe that I could be for a moment, and when you left I remembered why I was alone in the first place.

Because I’m a waste of space and energy.

“It’s not that I’m unloveable, it’s just that there are better people to love than me.”

— 12:30am // Krystal

It’s sad to think I’ve grown so used to this by now..I’m used to waking up wishing I was dead..I’m used to hating food.. I’m so used to hating every inch of myself.. I’m used to hating this family.. I’m used to being used like a lap dog..I’m used to crying alone at night.. I’m used to being left alone and abandoned.. I’m used to being worn down until I’m completely burnt out.. I’m used to being the ugly one. The fat one. The retarded one.the annoying one.the worthless good for nothing fuck up no one wants...I’m used to thinking of ways to kill myself..I’m used to wishing a I was dead... I’m so used to it all..that there are weeks I won’t cry while wanting to slice myself apart..that I don’t think I could exist any other way...it’s sad to think I’m so used to this disgusting existence...

i don’t deserve anyone’s love and affection I don’t deserve it I don’t

I’m not needed, so why am I still here?

Via (missblack22)

I’m thinking of reasons why I liked you. It’s because I didn’t think bad about myself when I was talking to you, I didn’t have the urge to cut when I felt your touch on my skin, when I saw your smile and heard your laugh I felt like everything was going to be okay. You were the perfect distraction and now I have nothing…

~ via @missblack22

I ask myself this all the time.