Here’s A Link With How You Can Helpout With The BLM Movement

Request for helping reader through a panic attack over family?

hi anon! i'm so sorry it took me so long to answer but i finally did it. i hope it's what you wanted! you can read it here. i hope you enjoy it :) <3

There needs to be change, and the change needs to happen now.

(gonna be painting pride stuff all month, but this one is the most important)

What it’s like to date Connor Murphy:

Request: Headcanons what it’s like to date Connor?- Anon

Word Count: 430

Warning: cussing 

Authors Note: Hey yall its been a while. I have been struggling with my mental health alot for a bit but slowly but surely I've been working on making it better. No promises as to when i'll get to the other requests. Sorry about that. Here’s this short hc list that has been siting in my drafts for forever. Anyways hope you're all doing okay and have a good day/night! :) <3 

•Connor towering over you which led to him always resting his head on top of yours and wrapping his arms around your shoulders

•Him deciding to stop smoking as often because he feels like he doesn’t need to. (but if you’re down he’d totally love to smoke with you!)

•You constantly steal his shirts, sweaters and sweatshirts because they smelled like him.

•He’d also steal your clothes and actually pull them off really well

•You calling each other pet names such as babe, love, hun and many others but only over text and when you were alone because Connor didn’t want people to make fun of y’all

•Also Connor is touch starved (me too smh) so he is constantly touching you, holding your hand, arm around your shoulder, arm around your waist, literally whatever you can imagine he does. But when he does this in public he makes sure to look extra in intimidating so no one says anything about it

•He loves to kiss the top of your head/forehead

•Having cute pictures of each other as your phones lock screens but the same selfie from the night of your first date is both your homescreens

•Connor has a clear phone case and keeps a polaroid of you in it from a late night date in the orchard

•One of Connor’s favorite things is when you play with his hair and massage his scalp especially after a rough night. It always puts him right to sleep.

•Speaking of sleeping, when you and Connor cuddle it depends on your guys mood whos the big spoon and whos the little spoon, usually he's big spoon though

•After he’s had a particular bad day whether it was the assholes at school or he’s just having a bad mental day Connor loves to lay his head on your chest and listen to your heart beat because it grounds him and reminds him that he’s real and so are you

•He’s poetic as shit and has an amazing way with words. He always knows what to say to make you feel better no matter your mood.

•I imagine him being such a fucking romantic person. He always plans the best dates and gives/makes you the best gifts.

•All his gifts just have a lot of thought put into them. He has a beautiful reason for whatever he does.

•He listens to a lot of music so he makes 50 million playlists for you and they always fit the vibe he’s trying to create

•In conclusion Connor is a softie who deserves all the love.

the mike faist effect: making everyone he plays bisexual

changed my user name feeling very swag 😎 also let it be known that i am trying to work on requests i am just not doing very well rn so unfortunately writing isn’t a priority at the moment:/

the you i fell in love with

connor murphy x female!reader

a/n: not me writing a fic about mike faist’s connor murphy 2 years after he left the show…… also Connor is probably ooc 

summary: you were Connor’s girlfriend who lived in the next town over, a little over a half hour away. his family didn’t know about you, no one did. he didn’t want his family or anyone he knew to scare you away. in the end, it didn’t really matter. he was gone. when the Connor Project came to be and Evan resigned from being co-president, you ran into him. you questioned him about his “friendship” with Connor and he told you everything.

set after the Murphy’s find out the truth and before the Evan/Zoe reunion at the orchard.

second person pov

warning: a few swear words, also very brief mention of depression and taking your own life, and Larry Murphy kind of being a dick

word count: 5,577

______

“Who are you exactly?” Evan questioned the girl who pulled him off to the side of the supermarket where no one else around. To say he was a little nervous would be an understatement, he was freaking out on the inside.

“I’m so sorry! I probably scared you half to death dragging you along like that.. I just have some questions for you, if you don’t mind answering..?” You smiled at him sheepishly. Something about your awkward smile eased his mind a bit, but not enough. “No, sorry my mom actually is waiting for me by the-” “It’s about Connor!” You interrupted, looking at him through sad, heartbroken eyes. “..Please. Evan Hansen. I know you weren’t really friends with him. I know you weren’t even secret friends with him.. Because if you were, I would’ve known.”

Evan looked around before looking back at you, confused. “Who are you?” He asked for the second time. “I’m- I was Connor’s girlfriend. Y/N L/N. I met him 2 years ago at the apple orchard you guys rebuilt? That’s where we met actually.. We both went there because we thought that no one else would be there and that it would be the perfect place to escape. His family and classmates never knew about me because he-” you laugh slightly,” he was afraid they would take me away from him. Or that his family would fight in front of me and he’d lose his cool or that his sister would say nasty things about him to ‘spare me from being in a relationship with him’ or even that the bullies at his school would turn me against him even though he knew damn well I could never.” You stopped rambling and passed him a Polaroid picture of the two of you, sitting against the chain link fence that surrounded the old abandoned apple orchard. You were looking up at Connor with heart eyes as he smiled back down at you. A real smile. This was the real Connor Murphy.

Evan looked up from the picture at you, shocked before quickly returning it to you. “Oh my god… You must think I’m such a h- horrible person for doing all this and pretending to be best friends with your- your dead boyfriend- I’m so sorry for your loss by the way- and making up all these stories about things we never really did and starting a whole online campaign about-” “Evan!” He stopped ranting, breathing heavily. “Breathe, okay? In through your nose, out through your mouth. Relax.”

It was silent for a moment before Evan mumbled a quiet, “Thank you.”

You smiled knowingly. “Now. Mind telling me everything?”

Keep reading

“Nice To Meet You Too”-Connor Murphy X Reader (Soulmate AU)

Word Count: 4,164

A/N: Hey everyone! It’s been a hot minute but here’s my second fic, I made the reader gender neutral so more people could enjoy it! Thank you to everyone who reads this and everyone who read my last fic, it is very much appreciated! Hope you have an amazing day! :) 

Everyone was born with a tattoo on their inner left wrist with the first words their soulmate would ever say to them. These tattoos would disappear after the words had been said. Some people just had a simple “Hello!”s or “Excuse me!”s and nothing else, others had things such as totals from various purchases and what not but you were lucky, yours included your soulmate’s name. It read, “Uh, I’m Connor, nice to meet you too.” Connor. It was a lovely name but there were also a lot of people named Connor which led to you constantly getting your hopes up.  You always went out of your way to introduce yourself to people named Connor and probably looked a little insane while doing so.  A few of your friends had met their soulmates in elementary school but as high school went on more and more people were meeting their partners for life while you were still alone. You became a little discouraged but knew that yours was out there and you were going to meet them eventually. Then came some of the best and worst news of your life. You were moving out of state at the end of junior year a couple of weeks after school got out. You were partially overjoyed because you had already interacted with every single Connor in your area but it also meant you were leaving your home of almost eighteen years. Your junior year went by faster than you would have liked and the time came to say goodbye to your childhood best friend Quinn. They came over to help your family pack as they were like the second child your parents never had and once the last box was put into the U-HAUL truck the two of you broke down crying and gave one another the biggest hug.

 Once the breakdown was finished you gave each other one last tear-filled smile before you got into the front seat of your parents’ car and pulled out of the driveway of your childhood home. As you were sitting in the passenger seat with your earbuds in you though of Quinn and how you met. The two of you were in the same preschool, on the first day during playtime you were sitting alone and they came up and declared you two were going to be best friends for forever and the rest was history. You were indeed best friends and were almost never seen without the other. You soon became sad so decided to try and think of something else. You knew Quinn was going to be okay because they had recently met their soulmate so they weren’t going to be alone during this transition period for the two of you. You, on the other hand, were not so sure how you were going to cope. Sure facetime was a thing that existed but it definitely wasn’t the same as Quinn just busting into your house at random times and your parents just being okay with it. You slowly fell into a dreamless sleep for the majority of the rest of the trip.

 When you woke up again your mom informed you that you were just about two hours from your new home. You got out at the gas station you were currently stopped at and went to the bathroom and got a few snacks for you and your mom to share. You started to stare out the window and soon your thoughts went to your soulmate, Connor. You hoped that you were going to get to meet him soon as this was currently the only thing keeping you going. You finally arrived at your new house about an hour before sunset. You and your parents began to unload everything from the U-HAUL truck. It took a lot longer without Quinn and you ended up having to finish in the dark. While your dad was returning the truck you and your mom decided to unpack the necessities then leave the rest for tomorrow. When your dad came back the three of you decided to get something to eat and just drive around the town. 

You got food from Mcdonalds and took in the sights of your new home. It was a nice town, not too big or small, it looked like there were a lot of things to do and places to eat. The last stop on your sightseeing tour was the town’s high school. It looked a lot bigger than your previous school and you thought that building was hard to navigate so you could tell this was going to be a nightmare. On your way home you noticed a park right by your house. You could tell just by looking at it that it would be the perfect place to walk to at 3 AM when you couldn't fall asleep and just wanted to forget about all your troubles. Once you got home you found the box with your sleeping bag and pillow in it and found your new room. You set up your sleeping bag in your empty room, your furniture wasn’t supposed to arrive for a few days so you were stuck sleeping on the floor for the time being. You stared up at the textured ceiling and tried to fall asleep because you knew tomorrow was going to be filled with loads of unpacking but for some reason, you just couldn’t so you were going to call Quinn to just check in but decided against it since you remembered they were hanging out with their soulmate tonight. So you did what you always did when Quinn wasn’t available, imagine what your soulmate looked like. You really didn’t care what ‘Connor’ looked like it was just fun to try and put a face to a name. Slowly you fell into a dreamless sleep.

Your mother came into your room at about 8:30 so you could start unpacking. You finished the living room, kitchen, and bathroom before lunchtime.  You finished doing the rest of your house just before dinner time. You stood in your room, it was painted a nice light grey and you had hung up some of your posters and pictures and strung up your lights which made you feel more at home. Your dad called upstairs to tell you that he had picked up dinner on his way home from work. While the three of you were eating he talked about his new job, he was a lawyer and had gotten an amazing opportunity at a pretty well-known law firm, which is why you guys moved. He told you about his new office and some dick named Larry he worked with. Once dinner was finished the three of you talked for a couple of hours about how everyone was feeling about the move, as the conversation was winding down you felt yourself growing tired, you bid your parents goodnight went upstairs to bed. Thoughts of how you were going to arrange your room filled your head, the furniture was supposed to arrive the next afternoon and you couldn’t wait to finally finish setting up your room. That night you had a weird beauty and the beast-esque dream filled with talking furniture. 

The furniture truck arrived around 12:30 that afternoon and you finished setting up your room at about 3, you decided to facetime Quinn to show them your new room. They helped you decide where to put a couple small things then after that the two of you just caught up, they told you all about how amazing their soulmate was and you couldn’t help but feel a small pang of jealousy, they asked about ‘Connor’ and you told them you hadn’t found him yet. You lied and told them your mom was calling so you could stop talking about soulmates cause it was making you upset.  After you got off the phone you and your mom decided to get lunch at a locally owned diner which made you feel a lot better about not finding Connor yet, before you went home you stopped at the grocery store and picked up somethings so you could begin making food in your own kitchen. Once you got home you decided to take a nap until dinner was ready. You woke up around 5:15 and saw that Quinn had sent you a message so you responded and told them about your lunch, just as you hit send on your message you heard your dad come in and your mom called up to you to tell you dinner was ready. Dinner was good and your dad said work was good which made you feel like maybe this move was a good thing. 

The next morning your mom barged into your room and told you to get up and get ready to go tour your new school. You begrudgingly got up and dressed, you then went downstairs to meet your mom. The two of you headed out to her car and on the way put you grabbed some fruit so you wouldn’t be cranky during the tour. Once you arrived and found the main office you met your principal and she gave you your schedule and then introduced you to your tour guide, Alana Beck. She was very pretty and you could tell she was smart just by looking at her. Once your principal set you loose so the tour could actually begin Alana became much more talkative, not in a bad way, of course, it was nice to not have to worry about keeping the conversation going. As the tour progressed you felt your anxiety melting away, the building actually wasn’t that hard to navigate and your classes were easy enough to find. You and Alana found your way back to the principal’s office but before you went in Alana gave you her number that way if you had any questions about anything you could always text her. It was nice to know you already knew someone at school and wouldn’t be going in with a completely clean slate. You went into the office and said good-bye to Alana and your new principal. You walked out of that building feeling oddly calm. You and your mom went out to breakfast and you got one of your favorite diner foods. Your mom dropped you off at home after breakfast because she had to go to her first day at her new job.

 You decided to walk down to that little park you saw on your drive around the town. You put in your earbuds and started walking. It took a little while for you to find it but you did eventually. When you arrived you saw that there was another person there. They were sitting on the swingset. You decided to walk around the block to try and avoid human contact at all costs. When you looped back around to the park you saw the tall figure still sitting on a swing. You were tempted to take another lap around the block but there was a feeling in your gut telling you not to. So you didn’t. You decided to just sit on the farthest swing from the person. You decided to sneak a peek. They had wavy brown hair that reached their shoulders and were wearing all black, just like you. You chuckled to yourself, maybe a little too loudly cause the person turned and looked at you. FUCK! FUCK, FUCK, FUCK! Why did I have to fucking do that! It wasn’t even that funny!” you thought to yourself. They continued to look at you. “Wow, they’re pretty. WAIT, not the time you idiot! Holy shit what do I do? Should I say something?! I should say something. Right?” before you could even contemplate what to do you felt yourself opening your mouth and saying “Sorry, I just noticed we’re both wearing black and thought it was kinda funny. Anyways, I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you.”, you awkwardly stuck your hand out for them to shake. 

They hesitantly took it and said, “Uh, I’m Connor, nice to meet you too.” You swore you died right then and there, you could not believe your ears. The two of you just realized what happened and said “Holy shit” in perfect unison. 

“HOLY SHIT!” you squealed. You ran over to Connor and gave him a gigantic hug, you could tell you scared him with this sudden physical contact but eventually hugged back just as tight as you. At some point, you had started crying out of pure happiness because OH MY GOSH you just met your soulmate! The two of you eventually pulled apart and you just looked at him and soaked in his beauty. You noticed that half of his left eye was a rich dark brown while the other half and eye were a light blue. You noticed how angular his face was and how nice his lips were. 

“Soooooo,” he said in a very dragged out manner. “What do we do now?” 

“I don’t know I’ve never met my soulmate before,” you say, hoping to lighten the tension. “I guess get to know each other if that’s cool with you.” 

“Yeah sounds good. What do you want to know?”

“Why have I never seen you before?”

“I just moved here a couple of days ago with my parents. My dad got a good job opportunity at some law firm around here so we moved.”

“Wait is your last name L/N?”

“Yeah? How’d you know?” you asked, suddenly growing very aware of the fact you and Connor were alone in the park.

“Holy Shit, calm the fuck down. I’m not a creep I swear,” he said getting kind of angry with you, you guessed your internal freakout was showing on the outside. “My dad works at that law firm and mentioned something about a new hire.” 

“Oh okay. Sorry for freaking out dude. It was just kinda weird that someone I just met knew my last name regardless if we were soulmates or not.” you said in a very sincere manner, you really didn’t want to mess up your relationship in the very beginning.

“It's all good, don't worry about it,” he says, tension leaving his body. “My last name is Murphy if you were wondering.”

“Well nice to finally meet you, Connor Murphy.”

“Nice to finally meet you too Y/N L/N.”

You and Connor sat in the park until dusk just talking about anything and everything. He told you about his family and how school was hell for him and you told him how anxious you felt moving here. Maybe it was because you were soulmates but the two of you just felt so comfortable around each other already. Before you left he gave you his phone number and you gave him a promise to text him. On the walk home, you felt as if you were walking on air. You quickly whipped out your phone and texted Quinn telling them all about Connor. They let you rant over text about him for most of your walk home, they were so happy for you. You decided to text Connor before you went into your house. As you were walking in the front door he texted you back and you had a gigantic dopey grin on your face. Your parents stopped talking as you walked into the living room, your mom asked, “What’s got you so happy?”

“Oh nothing,” you said over dramatically. “Just met my soulmate that’s all. No biggie,” you said shrugging your shoulders and biting your lip in an attempt to hold back your smile. 

“Oh my gosh honey!” your mother said practically jumping over the couch to reach you. “When? How? Where? What does he look like?” she asked, barely breathing while doing so. You wanted to keep them in suspense for a little bit but decided against it as you didn’t want your mother bursting a blood vessel.

“Earlier today. After you dropped me off and went to work I decided to walk to that little park not that far from here and that's where I met him,” you said suddenly feeling shy about the whole thing, you weren't a fan of being bombarded with all these questions from your mother. Once you satisfied your mom with adequate answers you went up to your room and continued to text Connor. The two of you were planning your first date, well more like Connor was planning your first date because you didn’t know anything to do. Connor suggested getting dinner and seeing a movie in the town next to yours and you thought that was a lovely idea. The date was set for Saturday which was still a few days away from now lucky for you because it meant you had a couple of days to figure out your outfit and get advice from Quinn. You and Connor were texting for hours before you looked at the clock on your nightstand and realized that it was four in the morning, you bid Connor goodnight and went to bed with a stupid grin on your face.

When you woke up you immediately texted Quinn to tell them about your plans for this weekend. They were so happy for you and they agreed to help you pick out an outfit. You were on facetime for hours modeling different outfit choices before you picked one, it was casual but still looked like you were making an effort. Once the outfit situation was figured out you started talking about the actual date, you started freaking out a little bit because ‘oh my god’ what if he didn’t like you but Quinn was quick to reassure you that he was literally your soulmate and you two were meant to be together. You spent the next few days texting Connor and waiting for Saturday.

Finally, after much anticipation, Saturday arrived! You could barely sleep the previous night you were so excited. It was like the night before going on a big field trip in elementary school, you had your clothes laid out and made sure literally everything was perfect. You woke up early to get ready, you showered, did a face mask and painted your nails to kill time while waiting for Connor to pick you up. Once the time that was decided upon rolled around you saw a black truck pull up in front of your house. You didn’t even need the text saying he was here to know that it was Connor’s. You said goodbye to your parents and practically ran out to Connor’s truck. Once you reached it Connor told you to wait while he got out and opened the door for you with a blush on his face. He quickly went around to the driver's side and got in, he reached into the back seat and pulled out flowers which you found very sweet. “Ah so chivalry isn’t dead,” you said while laughing lightly.

“No it isn’t,” he said while smiling. The drive over was filled with the sound of a playlist Connor made, conversation was scarce as both of you were scared to mess this up. You pulled up to the restaurant and Connor quickly got out and opened the door for you again. You thanked him and fixed your disheveled outfit. The restaurant was a nice little diner with an ice cream place attached to it when you walked in Connor got the two of you a booth. The booth was in the back corner of the restaurant, the seats were a little worn down but still comfortable. Once the two of you got settled in, a nice middle-aged woman came over and got your drink orders, you guys looked over your menus and silently decided what you were going to get to eat. You decided you had enough of this awkward silence and started a conversation. 

“Soooo, how was your day Connor?” 

After that, the ice was broken and conversation between you two came naturally. You talked about things such as your favorite TV shows, movies, and books. The service was fast and soon after placing your order the food came and it was pretty good. Once your waitress dropped off the check at your booth Connor insisted on paying much to your dismay, after that two of you got some ice cream before heading to the movie theatre. This time Connor let you have the AUX Cord and you played some stuff from your favorite artist, he had only heard a couple of their songs so he asked you about them which resulted in you rambling about them for almost the entire 15-minute car ride to the movie theatre. Once you were done you had realized how long you’d been talking and started apologizing and blushing immensely. Connor only laughed and told you it was fine with a huge smile on his face, what he didn’t tell you is that he found it extremely cute. Once you arrived at the theatre you bought your tickets and headed in. Although you two just ate dinner you decide to get some stuff from the snack bar. After getting your snacks you found your theatre and settled into the somewhat uncomfy seats just in time for the previews to start. Neither of you were particularly interested in the movie but you still watched it nonetheless. About halfway through the movie Connor “smoothly” put his arm around your shoulders and you leaned your head into him. Now neither of you wanted the movie to end now but alas it had to, on your way out you grabbed Connor’s hand and didn’t let go until you had to to be able to get in the car but once you clicked your seat belts Connor reached across the center console and put his hand out for you to hold if you wanted to, and you wanted to. On the way home you talked about the movie then somehow you got on the topic of soulmate tattoos. 

“Do you know how insane I went going out of my way to introduce myself to every single person named Connor?” you say while laughing. “I literally introduced myself to every single one of them in my old town and even the surrounding counties!” 

“I’m sorry my parents named me something so basic I’ll be sure to scold them for it,” he says while pretending to be serious. 

“I think I’ll have to fight them when I meet them!” you say still laughing. This is what cracks him and he begins to laugh with you. 

“Oh my god please do!” he says with a gigantic smile on his face.

After that, the two of you calm down but still have dumb grins on your faces.

“How did you feel walking around with the stupid thing I said to you on your wrist for seventeen years?” 

“It was comforting knowing my soulmate was an emo piece of shit like me,” he says with a grin.

“Hey! I’m not emo! I just happen to like the color black,” you say pouting.

“Okay whatever helps you sleep at night sunshine,” he says with an overdramatic eye roll. After that, the two of you fell into a comfortable silence which was nothing like the one on the ride over. Sooner than you would’ve liked Connor pulled up in front of your house.

 “Here we are”

“Yup,” you say, not wanting to get out just yet. “Thank you for tonight I had a really amazing time.”

“Of course,” he says, turning to look at you. Once he does so a small smile appears on his pretty face. You decided this would be a good note to leave on, you reluctantly let go of his hand and began to collect your things. You look at Connor and don’t know what possesses you but you give him a kiss on the cheek.

“I’ll text you tomorrow, okay?” you ask, your cheeks on fire from what you had just done.

“Mhm, sounds good,” he says, barely above a whisper. Face beat red, he puts his hand up to the place you had just kissed. “Good night Y/N.”

“Good night Connor,” you say while opening the door of his truck. You shut the door and smile at him and walk up to your front door. You wave at him to let him know you got in okay and as a final goodbye for the night. Your parents were out for the night so you didn’t have to deal with your mom’s bombardment of questions about the date until breakfast the following morning. You went upstairs and changed into your pajamas, still smiling. You texted Quinn and let them know how perfect the date went, making sure to let them know every single detail. That night you dreamed of Connor, your future together and how happy you were to meet him. 

One question before I make a request for Connor, what do you think about him smoking weed? Do you think it’s not a good thing? Or are you cool with it?

hi anon! i’m definitely cool with it! i just wish he didn’t rely on it so heavily, but i get why he did. :/ also i might not be the most knowledgeable with this specific topic because i’ve only been high like half a time LMAO.

hey there :0 recently found yr blog and i just wanna say yr writing is really good! i saw yr requests were “openish” so if this is an inconvenience then that’s ok and you don’t have to write anything :)

but connor murphy w a male reader who likes to draw? and he draws them together in his free time? maybe babies connor a lot in private too? (^^*)

if you decide to do this, ty! if not, that’s ok too! keep up the good work ♡🦑

dear anon i am so sorry it took me so long to get to this and it's probably not what you were looking for.

sincerely,

chinchilla-on-the-moon