I Crave Being Someone’s First Choice So Bad. Why Does No One Ever Choose Me Over Others?

just a little life update: unlovable!

Deep rooted problems

there’s something so disgusting and feral and perverted about getting off to the smell of someone

getting handed your sweater or a blanket and it’s supposed to be for comfort when we can’t see each other but instead i’m fucking my toy and shoving my face into it because fuck. you just smell so good i couldn’t help it

it’s not my fault your smell throws me into a fucking heat, i’m just doing what dumb mutts are supposed to >_<

I just want to be soft, please just let me be soft.

this might not be relatable at all but like. is there any other trans masc who isnt *nearly* as dysphoric without clothes as they are with?

cus like. if i look at myself shirtless its kinda like. yeah obviously i wish i had a flat chest but its like oh well i can deal with this for now.

but when im wearing clothes and you can see my chest with them on???? even if im wearing a binder?? i feel like ripping my hair off and do diy top surgery with the nearest sharp object i can find

the intimacy of knowing what someone's hands feel like