“Real tears are not those that fall from the eyes and cover the face, but those that fall from the heart and cover the soul.”
— Unknown
The flowers inside of me are withering,
Blues, pinks, and purples—
All fading away.
Where did the time go?
I’ve watered the garden within me,
Ive been vigilant.
So why?
Tell me why the colors are vanishing,
Tell me why I am fading away,
And listen before I go.
Tell me of the times I was vibrant inside,
Remind me of my favorite songs,
And all I used to be infatuated with.
Plant a new garden inside of me,
This time, you can have the seeds
And the watering can.
For I do not trust myself with them anymore.
I wish for bluebells
And lilac petals this last time around,
Then I will finally be able to rest.
I loved a girl
like the earth loves the rain,
knowing she’d never stay,
but needing her just the same.
She cried once in my arms
and I caught her tears
as if they were stars
fallen just for me...
but she wept for him.
I bandaged wounds
carved by another man’s hands,
whispering lullabies
to a heart that beat for someone else.
Every time she broke,
I shattered more quietly.
She kissed me...
like a door half-open,
warmth lingering on the threshold,
but her soul still pacing
somewhere far inside a house
I was never invited to live in.
And still,
I gave her my all,
a love without borders,
a fire without fuel,
a sea willing to drown
just to hold her reflection
for one more second.
Is this not the cruel poetry of love?
To give,
not for return,
but because you were born
with hands that only know how to hold,
even when holding means breaking.
They say unrequited love
is the purest kind.
Perhaps because it never has the chance
to rot with reality.
It stays eternal;
not because it lives,
but because it dies
beautifully.
To love like this
is to bleed in silence
and call it devotion.
To smile through heartbreak
because her happiness,
even in someone else's arms...
still feels holier
than my own.
- Cyrus K.
I want to lose myself in your love
make you my home again.
But your happiness doesn't belong to me
it is she that makes you bleed
and I watch without being seen.
“It’s amazing how much damage can be done when you have nothing but good intentions.”
— Tom Marin
I was the moth.
Not blind,
but aching.
I was not deceived by the flame,
I longed for its ruin.
To be undone in that heat,
to burn knowing,
was a worship beyond reason.
A thousand lifetimes in darkness
could never equal
one death
in such light.
-Cyrus K.
2 April, 1937 Letters to Véra by Vladimir Nabokov
I hold my brother on my lap,
I don't tell him to calm,
Or hush his sobs,
He does that himself.
I cannot stop his world ending,
But I am his sister, and as long as I stay,
He has a part of his world still there.
Sweetness 4 You
the fates can't let us collide
you see
I'm cursed
my days filled with anxiety
but your voice
god, your voice
it lingers in the marrow of my mind
like a prayer never answered
like worship turned wound
an altar trembling in your shadow
i know it's hard for you now
so collaps into me
drown me sweetly
steep into my very being
my body and soul is all yours
not even the holy dare to enter
untouched even by the divine
do you think
"would their eyes forget me
if i buried myself beneath the waves?"
I know
you do
you wear it like skin
but my love, your fate is a prophecy
they would go blind
before they ever looked away
they would die for you
bleed for you
the heavens would fight
for an eternity
to claim your darkness
and to breathe YOUR NAME once
though the gods themselves choke on it
And I will kiss every single scar on your body and soul, to remind you that love doesn't
have to hurt.
Ginnie Bale