I'm All The People I've Ever Loved

Hannibal: If I promised you to go vegetarian from today on, would you promise me in return never to keep your feelings towards me under lock and key again?

Clarice: Feelings that you only imagine, Dr. Lecter...

Hannibal: Feelings you haven't been able to explain since we first met. Let me explain. Your voice changes when you speak to me, Clarice. It becomes rough and deep with desire, your breathing is faster than usual. An inexperienced psychologist like Chilton would say it's pure fear. I know better. You want me here and now. Just a promise. A word that stands between us.

Clarice: Allright. Promise.

On the mortifying ordeal of being known: 1. Blackout: Remembering The Things I Drank To Forget by Sarah Hepola / 2. Persona (1966) dir. Ingmar Bergman / 3. Secrets about People: A Short and Dangerous Introduction to René Girard by Alex Danco / 4. NBC Hannibal Season 1 Episode 8 "Fromage"

Random TLOK Rant

warning: yes, this looks horrible. no, i do know grammar. yes, i can't bother to fix this mess. and yes, i'm probably not making sense. and no, i've never experienced this issue myself and i'm not claiming to an expert. these are just my two cents on the matter.

i think the creators of tlok really missed an opportunity to depict people with mixed races. like, it's weird how tenzin is the only one among aang and katara's kids who wears orange and kya is the only one who wears blue. honestly, i was sorta disappointed when i saw that their clothes matched their bending-colours and stereotypical ethnic colours. kya wears blue cuz she's a waterbender and she looks like her mom. tenzin wears orange cuz he's an airbender and he's not brown?? (don't know how else to put it). then there's bumi. why does he wear red for most of the time until harmonic convergence? why didn't he wear either of his parents' colours. speaking of which, why does he wear orange only after becoming an airbender. is identifying with your parent's culture without being a bender of their element forbidden in this universe? it stings worse after realising that the harmony-restoration-movement thing in the comics was against this sort of segregation. that people born into interracial families don't have just one race that they can identify with. all of this reminds of encanto, honestly. i once read this post (prolly on tumblr, lol) discussing the fact that pepa looks lighter-skinned and 'whiter' then either of her siblings. don't remember the middle but the concluding statement was that pepa is just as indigenous as her siblings, despite her genes making her look otherwise. back to tlok, tenzin is just as much southern water tribe as kya, kya is just as much air nomad and bumi is equally both. if there is gonna be any continuation of the avatar universe, i wanna see mixed characters struggling to balance both their parents' cultures despite inheriting one or neither of their bending.

fr

hot evil characters who i want to fix but will make me cry if i actually meet them in real life>>>>>>

The killing is wrong but that actually involuntary manslaughter

Rewatching Hannibal. I maintain my stance that Abigail Hobbs has done nothing wrong ever.

T_T

Lihat orang-orang yang tersenyum itu. Di belakangnya bisa jadi ada segudang beban menumpuk. Namun mereka memilih tersenyum karena mereka tahu...

Mereka sudah tahu bahwa sedih terus itu menguras tenaga, mengeluhkan takdir membuat kaku tangan dan kaki untuk berkarya.

Mereka menangis sampai sesenggukan jika diperlukan. Mereka tersungkur sampai demam ketika lelah menampar badan. Tapi setelah itu mereka bangun lagi. Mereka hadir lagi.

Mereka tahu hidup itu bergelombang; setelah turun ia akan meninggi. Setelah tinggi pun ada masanya jatuh lagi.

Tapi mereka paham bahwa hidup adalah anugerah terbaik yang Allah berikan. Mereka kembali tersenyum karena tahu bahwa masa depannya ada di tangan Allah yang sempurna rencana-Nya.

Maka buat apa menangis terus, batin mereka. Buat apa mengeluh terus, itu tak mengubah apa-apa.

—Bekasi, 21 Desember 2022

no matter the struggles there is always ao3 in bed

so, I have some ideas—