Pretty Funny That Everybody On This Entire Web Site Is A Fucking Mammal.

Pretty funny that everybody on this entire web site is a fucking mammal.

tell me this isn't them to a tee

One thing that pisses me off is people seeing fish in aquariums (the establishments, not home aquariums) and being like “It’s so sad because the ocean is so big and the tank is so small and they’ll never know freedom blah blah blah-“ I’m not talking about sharks and marine mammals here but the majority of fish are not at all bothered by being in an aquarium instead of the open ocean. Like, I personally would love to be a little clown fish in one of those big reef tanks. Fed regularly. Whole team of people monitoring my health and well-being. No predators. Medicated if I show signs of illness. Aquarium fish have cushy gigs in comparison to their wild companions.

Welcome, Weary Travelers

Sit down, put up your feet, and treat yourself to a pint.

Our resident bard will be taking the stage in just a moment...

Anyway - Welcome to Satire's Eulogy! Here, you can find musings about my current writing projects, rambling explanations of worldbuilding concepts for those projects, and story requests!

Currently, the only character I am taking requests for is Non-CC Wilbur Soot, as the general fanfinction interpretation of his character was the original inspiration for the male protagonist of my in progress book series and I need an excuse to do character studies. I may also add requests for 'OC' characters, i.e., characters from my series concept, when/if I introduce them here. This is, of course, subject to change.

Rules:

- No NSFW requests. If you won't find it in a high school library you won't find it here.

- Be respectful. There is no room for hate here.

- This is a place for escapism. Leave current affairs/controversies at the door.

***This isn't a democracy. This is a dictatorship. Break these rules - your comment will be deleted & you will be banned.

Useful tags:

Worldbuilding #EulogyLore

Story Requests #EulogyRequests

Other Asks #EulogyResponse

Writing Discussions #EulogySpeaks

Other Junk #EulogyRandom

Sit Back, Relax, and Enjoy the Show!

Not what I expected coming from John Green

Idk why but i find this funny even tho i need context

Look.

I have made you a chart. A very simple chart.

People say "You have to draw the line somewhere, and Biden has crossed it-" and my response is "Trump has crossed way more lines than Biden".

These categories are based off of actual policy enacted by both of these men while they were in office.

If the ONLY LINE YOU CARE ABOUT is line 12, you have an incredible amount of privilege, AND YOU DO NOT CARE ABOUT PALESTINIANS. You obviously have nothing to fear from a Trump presidency, and you do not give a fuck if a ceasefire actually occurs. You are obviously fine if your queer, disabled, and marginalized loved ones are hurt. You clearly don't care about the status of American democracy, which Trump has openly stated he plans to destroy on day 1 he is in office.

Puritanism is getting worse around the globe and conservatives and fascists will absolutely be first going harder against porn, then use that against queer people. You HAVE to realise this and oppose anti porn measures and laws, be in solidarity with sex workers, and listen to them when they call this shit out. It's going to be vitally important.

The dark brown sunspots sprinkled across my shoulders show that, once upon a time, I stood under in the suns relentless rays without adaquate sun protection. The excuse I gave my mother was, "I'll burn now and let it turn into a dark tan. Then I won't need sunscreen all summer." This was not correct, and time has instead shown that mothers are usually right. But we were an army of indestructible teenage angst working for the good of board children on a Tuesday afternoon enjoying their trouble-free summers before being sucked into the capitalist conveyer belt as we were now.

Oh well, at least I had a great tan. A kindly dermatologist can burn the cancer off another day.

#eulogytalks

Scars on your body show that you have lived; scars on your heart show that you have loved.

Nina Dul