Here are some facts about the aspec community whereas if you struggle to grasp or comprehend them, you probably still have some amatonormativity / allonormativity to unlearn:
Asexual people can have and desire romantic relationships even if sex is off the table for them.
Some asexual people like sexual content in fiction but not in real life.
There's a difference between an aroallo person and a non-committal cishet. No your cheating ex boyfriend who only cares about sex isn't automatically aromantic.
Being aroallo is not synonymous with a high libido.
Queerplatonic relationships can look exactly like an allonormative romantic relationship and not be one because things like kissing etc. aren't inherently romantic.
Asexual people can wear and like clothing that is revealing or commonly regarded as sexual without it meaning that they desire sex.
NOTHING but literal intercourse is inherently sexual. Kissing isn't inherently sexual. Not even french-kissing or making out. Neck kisses aren't inherently sexual. Flirting isn't inherently sexual. Hell, I only found out like two weeks ago that some people, even in the ace community, consider these things to be inherently sexual.
No form of affection is inherently romantic either. Kissing isn't inherently romantic. Hand-holding isn't inherently romantic. Cuddling isn't inherently romantic. Even all of these things in combination aren't automatically indicative of a romantic relationship.
You define whether something is sexual or romantic to YOU. This does not mean it is to everyone else.
Some aspecs just don't want a partner at all
Some aspecs aren't aromantic but don't mind not having a partner either.
A QPR isn't the only other option aside from platonic or romantic relationships. A QPR also isn't romance lite or the aro version of a romantic relationship.
Being demisexual or gray ace doesn't automatically make someone sex-favorable
Frayromantic people feel romantic attraction until they develop a close bond with the person. The romantic attraction fading does NOT necessarily mean they care about that person less or don't desire a committed relationship with them because relationships and attraction isn't hierarchical.
Some people don't want to engage with sexual content at all.
If you read these and you realize these never occurred to you or that you have been assuming some things, that's not a judgement of you. We all have internalized allonormativity and amatonormativity. It just means there's work to do.
men have to be some of the most insufferable people on this planet
boy it would be nice to be able to google something related to personality disorders, psychosis, intellectual disabilities, autism, DID/OSDD, etcetera without finding majority articles that are like “how to deal with a person with X” “how to cope with your child with X” “how to spot someone faking X” “can people with X be cured?”
heather, heather, heather, and eyeless jack
DAYUMMM
Hey there babe~ 😳✨🩷
"girl basil or boy basil" both. genderfluid basil. bigender basil. agender basil. basil has no gender and has all the gender. basil is basil.
i'm so sorry this is the first thing that popped into my head
Never kill yourself.
CHAPPELL ROAN
photographed by Ryan Clemens
For real (art is not mine)
because I love the angsty teen version of him it’s so corny