Rules Of Rationality.

teasing with kazuha was a big game to you. who gets flustered the most, who shys away first, wo touches who first when kissing, it was all a challenge. that you would lose. each and every time.

you were determined to win this time, though. you were going to leave him a red mess, begging for kisses! you weren’t gonna let yourself lose this time.

formal parties were a buzzkill, especially with all of the oogling eyes on your boyfriend and the hushed whispers about how dreamy he is.

so, if you were to deprive kazuha of his much needed attention, it would be fine, right? since he has his little goons, he doesn’t really need you to be at his every beck and call, right? he didn't seem too lonely.

thoma sure did, though. poor, poor thoma, all alone with no commissioner to bother him! you’re sure that kazuha wouldn't mind if you talked just a little bit, right? 

clearly, you think, this wasn’t the best way to go about it. 

you weren’t losing in your eyes, per se, just incredibly underpowered. you were just teasing kazuha, and now you were trapped in a cage of his arms in an abandoned hallway.

"i bet you think you're so smug and powerful, huh?" you breathlessly whispered, his slender fingers gripping onto your chin like you were bound to leave any minute. he wouldn't allow that, even if it just were a passing thought.

"oh, do you not think i am?" kazuha hummed beneath you, tracing his knuckles against your jawline and making you shiver whenever one of his many rings made contact with your skin. "because, i think it's quite clear who has who pinned."

"and i think it's quite clear who's gonna l-lose when we get home." you broke eye contact with him before he squeezed your thigh and leaned closer.

"i think we'll do other stuff before that, aha. do you really think we’ll even make it home, hmm?" 

he nibbled on your lip before enveloping you in another kiss, gripping your hair to push you two closer and closer until it felt like two bodies became one with how minimum space was between you two.

kazuha pulls away with a dangerous look on his face, a predator hunting their prey, before kissing you down from your jawline to your collarbones.

he left a fiery trail of reds and purples, bruises blooming across your skin as his teeth grazed across your skin. his blunt nails dug into your skin, rings once again making your breath hitch and bite your lip.

ah, maybe you have lost this game.

wounded scars

𓍢 summary. seeing you severely injured and badly hurt after doing a commission

𓍢 cw. grammatical mistakes may occur, usage of call signs, many mentions of blood / bleeding, mentions of (reader) collapsing, hostage tendencies, mentions / thoughts of reader dying (but- you actually don’t), mentions of torture / possible murder, slight possessive behavior

𓍢 includes. itto, diluc, xiao, aether, pantalone

𓍢 note. pantalone nation it’s time to rise!, reader doesn’t get hurt from a commission but an enemy of the fatui in pantalone’s part, hurt/comfort genre if you squint

requested by anon

ITTO.

he freaks out, freaks out too much that he isn’t even bothered that he’s making a whole scene because of it

his usual playful and jolly persona will disappear in an instant, and for once he holds a concern and serious expression on his face

any person that would be passing by him will have their guard up, because it’s one of the first times they have seen the oni, so serious which is rare to see from him

according to shinobu, the reason you were late and wouldn’t be able to attend the date he had arranged for you at the moment, was you just came back from a commission which unexpectedly gave you major injuries and was the reason you were at the edge of losing too much blood

as she continued to inform him of your whereabouts and your condition, the dread feeling in his stomach continued to drop, that he had to stop shinobu from continuing further, as just hearing from her that you got hurt already does a big damage to him

what more if he sees you, with his own eyes?

after genta told him where you’re currently resting, he didn’t waste a second going to you as he practically ditches everything in his way

i hope you don’t mind a clingy oni next to your side because, do you expect the arataki itto to leave you after this? the answer was evident that it’s a no, he will stay with you until you have finally recovered from the current events and not even you could stop himself from doing so

he would be very protective of you, afraid that you will leave his sight any second, like he’s some sort of guard dog. every person that’s going to talk to you will have to be 6 feet away whether they like it or not, and if they get too close from his liking? perhaps, you better grab his arm before he pounces on them 

he tries to hide the fact that he is worried about you and would instead tease you with playful remarks to make you smile or laugh, but on the matter of how he takes care of you gently like you’re a piece of glass says a lot more than he is

once he sees it with his own eyes that you’re recovering, you would have to convinced him to stop the act of scaring and driving away the people who goes near you, as you assure him that they don’t mean any harm and are different from the ones who had attacked you

itto sheepishly apologized for being a little overbearing during the time you were recovering after being scolded by you, while embarrassingly stuttering out that he just doesn’t want you to experience the same scenario again

if you ever try to do another commission again, then i hope you’re also expecting for itto to join you and he will not take a rejection as an answer

“Hey babe where are ya going? Huh go where? Let me go with you! What me? worried? Psh, Of course I’m worried!”

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mistletoe mishaps | scaramouche x reader

day three. mistletoe ft. scara

event masterlist

you chase around your boyfriend with mistletoe, much to his secret content. 

a/n: me?? being on time?? more likely than you think. 

tags: light angst. 

scaramouche had always been a bit of a grump when it came to the wintertime. it was gloomy and cold and dark and the perfect time to stay inside and do absolutely nothing, but you had the absolute audacity to be the opposite.

you were always insistent on decorating the house with bright lights, covering the bannister with red ribbon, and playing the ridiculously happy music for this time of year. you had always encouraged him to embrace the warmth of companionship at this time of year, but he stubbornly refused.

you were patient with him, an aspect he was secretly grateful for. over the course of your first few years of dating, you had never once given up on him. whether it was convincing him to get out of the house for some ice skating or dragging him to volunteer at the local children’s hospital, you were adamant that he have a little bit of fun.

and apparently, today, that meant chasing him around with mistletoe.

“i know you wanna kiss me!” you hollered as you slid on the hardwood floor in your socks. teasingly, you held a branch of mistletoe in front of you, waving it in front of your boyfriend.

“screw off! quit chasing me around with that thing!” scaramouche yelled back, scarmbling around the dining room table to avoid you. thinking he had a moment of reprieve, he let out of a soft sigh. to his surprise and to your delight, you jumped on top of the table and scrambled closer to him. he shrieked, quickly escaping to the next room.

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||⠀ ⠀ ⠀ Anemo boys.

⠀ ¡⠀۰  ⠀神﹕⠀genshin matching icons.

The artist is @/yionyi23 on twitter . ♡ —like and reblog if saved.

꒰⁺˖͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏Rui Kamishiro ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏˖⁺꒱

nothing less.

(kazuha x asexual!reader)

warnings: hints of nsfw, mainly fluff, pet names, reader is hinted at being on the ace spectrum, overall just very cute

the embrace was familiar.

the hands that ghosted over your waist did little to nothing to quench the uneasy feeling in your stomach, nor did it help you hide the frown on your features.

the silence in the air was almost suffocating, and the tension felt as if it was thickening with every second that passed between you and your lover.

his hands trailed up to your face, caressing your cheek with his calloused palm; a small reminder of the battles he has fought, sword in hand.

a small yet comforting smile adorned his face as you both locked eyes, his tender touch causing a pleasant shiver down your spine.

“my muse,”

his thumb wiped away a stray tear, before moving to put your hair behind your ear. “if you’re feeling uncomfortable, there is no rush to carry on.”

his tone sounded even softer than what it was usually; the solemn expression he wore silently telling you it was okay.

fitting, really, considering how vulnerable you both were in this moment.

you expected nothing less from the wandering samurai.

“i…” breaking eye contact, you felt guilt seep into your burning skin. “i don’t want to leave you unsatisfied, kazuha.”

he chuckled at that, closing his eyes. “i’m satisfied, dove. your very presence is enough for me, i wouldn’t ask for more.”

he looked beautiful like this, you thought. the moonlight leaking in from the window lit up his features; he was nothing short of divine.

so why was this so hard? denying him? any other person would jump for the opportunity, which begs the question: why haven’t you?

“i love you, so, so much.” a deep breath. “i just have no desire to… do this… i’m sorry.” your voice had turned into a whisper by the end, you were finding it hard to say anything else.

“and… i love you more than anything, no matter what. so why feel guilty?” he pressed his forehead to yours, your noses bumping ever so slightly. “your lack of sexual desire won’t stop me from loving you, my muse.”

a weight was lifted off your shoulders as he said that.

sighing softly, you cuddled into him, your head on his chest as his fingers smoothed over your hair.

“never change, y/n.” he cooed, similar to a bird singing into the night sky.

“i wouldn’t have you any other way.”

asking genshin boys "what are we?"

characters : tighnari , cyno , kaedehara kazuha , scaramouche

genre : fluff

scenario : reader asks them "what are we?" when they had automatically assumed you were aware of their feelings towards you

trigger warning : none except everyone here being short, i hope

tighnari

before you even asked the question, tighnari had a bad suspicious feeling about you today

he lightly sighed while looking over some of his leftover paperwork

even during his "office hours", he couldn't help but notice the "sneaky" glances and pretty much everything he's ever known about nervous body language from you

"you ask the most intriguing questions whenever you're fidgeting like that. tell me, what is it?" he couldn't help the sarcastic tone even if he tried

but his half-joking tone helped you relax, tighnari seemed to have talent at naturally calming you down

okay, here goes nothing.

"what are we, tighnari?" you finally managed to ask him

he answered with absolutely no hesitation immediately

"you? a human if my memory serves. as for me, i happen to be a fennec fox hybrid."

"... tighnari..."

stops writing at your tone- that didn't sound like you were joking

you were being serious? no way...

tighnari looked straight into your eyes, expression conflicted

he furrowed his brows and kept eye contact to see if you were pranking him or something

"...you're joking right?" he asked, half hopeful that he wasn't the one jumping into conclusions here

"...no"

he looked speechless, but then he let out a sigh

"enlighten me on what exactly makes you confused on what our relationship is?" he was sure he made it crystal clear

"we... i don't know, i can't tell. that's why i'm asking you" disbelief was written all over his face at your answer

"i held your hand."

"you did."

"i hugged you before."

"yes?"

"...i gave you flowers i grew myself on numerous occasions."

"yes, i'm keeping them as a bookmark like you suggested."

tighnari's scowl deepened, trying his hardest not to look lowkey offended that you were still confused after all that

how could you even not know, everyone knew from the forest rangers crew so why didn't you?

never mind, you clearly needed confirmation

"... i believe i have romantic feelings for you and just until now i was under the impression that you were aware." your eyes widened at tighnari's blunt words

you noticed the pink flush in his cheeks when he finally had to admit

"geez, want me spell it out for you? need a contract or something?" despite his complaint, tighnari felt content with the way your expression showed clear signs of happiness

how could you not fall even deeper for him, when he looked that adorable with rosy cheeks and slightly downturned ears?

approaches you from his desk and sits next to you

places his hand on yours, lightly squeezing them

"well, how about you then? what am i to you?"

cyno ( general mahamatra )

cyno's face remains emotionless most of the times, everyone who ever met him would agree in a heartbeat

he also had this habit of keeping very, very unwavering eye contact on whoever he was talking to

you've heard many of his subordinates mention how scary and intimidating it was to face his stone-cold stare

and to your absolute horror, he looked the same as ever when you nervously asked something that's been on your mind for days and weeks now

"what are we, cyno?"

"..." almost as if frozen, cyno stayed silent and merely stared at you like he did every day

oh no, this was definitely not the reaction you were ready for

his gaze seemed a bit too heavy on you, especially with how his scarlet eyes were emphasized by the comforting darkness of midnight surrounding you

"i mean- what i meant was-" before you could finish your sentence, he blurted out, loud and clear

"are we not already dating?"

a painful silence followed

it was your turn to freeze now

already dating...? but...

"no?" you blurted out before you could control it

your heart dropped at cyno's normally stoic face clearly flashed signs of sadness

"wait no i mean- but you didn't... ask me out" you barely managed to ask

cyno blinked once, then twice

then finally for the first time, you saw the general mahamatra ever avoid your gaze and cough in a bashful manner

he awkwardly scratched his neck and looked away from you

were you imagining things, or does he look... super nervous right now?

your eyes nearly fell out of your socket, he looks so adorable...??

"i... thought you already knew, i apologize."

finally after a while, cyno fixated his gaze on you again and regained his posture

"i like you, (name). i'd like to date you... if you share my feelings."

god, he really is the prettiest boy, isn't he?

kaedehara kazuha

the moment you mentioned that you wanted to talk, kazuha gently holds your hand and stares lovingly with a soft smile on his face

"of course, love."

it wouldn't matter where he was or what he was doing, he'd always make time for you. always.

when he led you to a place where you could have privacy, your heart fluttered at how his hand never left yours

when you two were alone, kazuha turned at you

nods and looks at you with the most adorable look in his eyes

"yes, what is it, love?"

he didn't look... like this with others right?

"kazuha... what are... we?" you finally gained the courage to ask him

not surprised in the slightest at the question and finally connecting the dots as to why you looked so nervous

smiles and looks at you like you brought the moon to him

and to him, you did.

you brought the entire galaxy, staining, painting his world with the most beautiful of all colors he could've never imagined

which is why he feels slightly guilty that he's left you in the dark about his feelings

"what was my nickname for you, i wonder?" he smiled adorably

"...love?"

"yes, dear?"

you felt your cheeks flush at the unexpected answer, kazuha's soft giggle making your heart skip a beat

"i'm sorry for leaving it unclear." kazuha laces his fingers with yours

you stared into his eyes, unable to control the slight flush in your cheeks

kazuha couldn't stop smiling, just how beautiful and lovable were you? <3

with a soft giggle, kazuha placed a fleeting kiss on your hand

then another one on your forehead

"i'm yours as you are mine, love. if you'll have me."

scaramouche ( kunikuzushi )

"kuni... what exactly are we?"

"huh?"

he was sure he misheard that

he must have misheard that, right? tell him he's right and it was just a prank

outright glares at you when you stay quiet, looking at him all expectedly like you wanted an answer

god, stop looking at him like that... you look too cute it makes him feel all weird and warm inside, stop it-

of course you wanted an answer, everything with scara confused you the more you spent time with him

you were positive friends didn't act like... this

... but he also never confessed or anything of the sort

"you're telling me you're..."

realizes that you're serious, his face flushing in embarrassment and frustration

"god, how dense are you?" he sounded so disappointed, the tone of his voice irked you

"hey, you can't blame me for wanting disclosure, it's confusing!"

"how don't you know? you're doing this on purpose, aren't you?"

"what am i supposed to know? you don't need to act all weird and just answer like a normal person would- ouch!! what was that for?"

flicks your forehead damn hard

then, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you closer to him

you lost balance at his unexpected actions and stumbled into his chest

one arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you in closer to his slender body

you could barely breathe, you confusedly directed your gaze at him

but before you could say anything, scaramouche laced his fingers to yours, holding your hand a little too intimately than you expected

all words died in your throat

smirks at your reaction, holding your hand tightly now

"do you hold other guys' hands like this?"

"what- no!"

"hmm, i wonder why." you could almost hear the smirk from his voice

again, you opened your mouth to say something but was silenced for the second time

"then do you do this with other guys?" his husky voice whispered

grabs the back of your head with his free hand, then leans in

before you knew it, his lips were on yours

it was as though time itself has stopped that moment

you finally eased into his kiss, squeezing his hand back

scaramouche stared at you after pulling away

then smirked way too arrogantly than you'd have liked to see

...like he was proud of himself

deeply satisfied with how baffled and shy you looked, it was even better for him when you turned your gaze away to avoid his violet ones

he grabbed your chin and made you look at him, letting out a low laugh full of satisfaction

"figure out "what we are" yourself now, would you, darling?"

- affection with the wanderer in the avidya forest

- fluff hehe

a/n: i think it would be funny if scara had to do community service after all the stuff he did to sumeru so i briefly mentioned it in this. anyways scara brainrot go brrrr

- lowercase is on purpose

it started with a simple kiss to the back of his hand: quick and fleeting, just the way he liked it. see, too much affection without prior announcement was a no-go with the wanderer.

but then, when you tried to let go of his hand, he held on tight, almost desperately, and so you kissed his hand again, and then his wrist, all the way up to his neck where his knees began to buckle everytime your lips pressed against the sensitive spot between his jaw and throat.

luckily, no one was around or else he would have never allowed something like this to happen.

a nice quiet walk in the avidya forest was what you both needed after a stressful day of his "community service" that was mandated after the...everything... that happened.

He spoke little to no words during this walk, simply being by your side while your hands brushed lightly against each others. you were the one to initiate contact, sliding your fingers around his pinkie. he merely glanced at your hands and grunted before looking straight ahead again.

eventually you took hold of his ring finger as well, and then his whole hand which led to where you are now.

"what do you think you're doing?" he asks, eyes glaring sharply at you.

with a small smile on your face, you reply, "i think it's very obvious what i'm doing."

at this, he sucks in his breath through his teeth, looking anywhere but at you while he can still feel your warm breath on his neck, until slowly you lean back.

"do you want me to stop?"

biting his lip and still unable to meet your eyes, he swallows harshly while fidgeting with his one free hand, your hand still gently holding his other one.

"if i wanted you to stop, i would have told you already."

letting out a quick hum, you agree and kiss him once again on his neck before making your way to his jaw, the corner of his mouth, and then finally a quick kiss on his lips, barely lasting a second. seemingly dissatisfied, he groans and grips your chin between his index and thumb.

"that was weak," he says, before pressing his lips more firmly against yours, your eyes fluttering shut while he walks you backwards to the nearest tree. your back hits it with a quiet thud and his free hand soon comes to rest above your head while his other still held yours, effectively pinning you against it.

his mouth moved faster against yours, his body pressing into yours as if he was trying to mold himself with you, like he had been craving your touch for the entirety of his very long existence. the fingers of your free hand eventually find his hair, carding them through the strands and pulling softly.

when he was satisfied, he pulled away, his usual unimpressed scowl returning to his face. "if you're going to kiss me, at least do it right."

"oh? would you like me to pin you to a tree next time?"

"shut it."

genshin men as wedding dates (3)

It’s wedding season and you’ve got a large one coming up. But it’s not just any wedding, it’s a family wedding meaning…extended relatives. Are you going to brave the night out on your own or are you rsvping with a plus one?

Featuring— Alhaitham, Cyno, Tighnari, Kaveh, Dainsleif, Dottore

gn!reader, modern au, mentions of alcohol, mostly platonic but implied romantic feelings

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 (here)

AL HAITHAM

there has to be some sort of trade-off; his time is precious so there's got to be something in it for him. luckily for you, who's one of the few people he considers a close friend, it's just some random errand he doesn't want to run

he’s a mediocre date; follows your lead and is just kind of a wallflower honestly. will make polite conversation but only if someone talks to him first

drinks just enough to loosen up but not enough to get sloppy, and definitely still sober enough to read the book he brought. you leave him be, but you’re still going to go have a good time at this reception

yikes someone from the groom's guest list comes sidling up, hoping to shoot their shot with the handsome stranger sitting alone. of course he gets annoyed; not only was this person disrupting him but wasn’t it obvious he came with you?

wait where are you

he finds you on the dance floor with… someone else??… which is fair since he's here as a friend, but he strides up to you anyway and does not hesitate to interrupt

"thanks for keeping my date entertained but I'll take it from here" and then he leads you away to a different corner of the dance floor

did not think this all the way through because now he’s dancing with you but it’s just so…… robotic. he tries, he really does, but that doesn’t stop the secondhand embarrassment from anyone who happens to see him. you don’t mind though, you think it’s cute

"finally haitham, I've been waiting for you all night!" and then you kiss him on the cheek

perhaps it was a combination of the lighting effects and the alcohol, but you don't notice the blush on his face

CYNO

events like these aren’t really his vibe but you catch him in a good mood after you 'laugh' at one of his jokes

seems like a very intimidating guest at first and that’s not the impression he wants to give to your family, so he brought his joke book! chooses to tell one at your table during dinner and the silence after he explains the whole thing is truly deafening

he tries again but says "how about this one; y/n thought it was hilarious." so now you have to fake laugh and elbow the cousin sitting next to you to laugh as well

one of the uncles from the table next to yours actually overheard and leaned back in his chair to tell him it was hilarious so that’s a win

when you get overwhelmed by relatives asking you when you're getting married, he steps in to help you but accidentally says,

"we'll take the step when we're ready"

wait what

mans is a mess trying to fix the situation and you've never seen him like this so now you have to save him by laughing it off and dragging him away

he plays genius invokation tcg with some of your teen relatives; they were losing though, so they distract him by saying "heard the next wedding's you and y/n" and it works

he gets really awkward around you after that and you have to reassure him that it’s fine, no big deal! you even joke that if fake dating tonight would get all the annoying aunties and uncles off your back, then sure let’s do it

he’d never tell you, at least not anytime soon, but it doesn’t sit right with him to hear you say ‘fake dating’

TIGHNARI

if you’re not bringing a bag/clutch/purse/whatever, then he will and he has everything: antacids, aspirins, bandaids, safety pins, an epipen, etc

wow this venue decorated the place with such nice plants, a shame they’re not for anyone to take home. good thing no one noticed him take clippings to propagate

it's great to have him on your team because he is very good at all the physical wedding games like cornhole, ring toss, etc. you don't win anything except bragging rights but at a family wedding? sure, you'll take it

doesn’t smile in any group photos; only smiles in photos of just the two of you and selfies that you take on your phone, even though he pretends to be over it

is not nice to your offensive relatives; super passive aggressive with lots of backhanded comments. he'll make some snide remarks under his breath but everyone thinks he's joking. finds out one of your uncles is a flat earther, and takes it personally

complains about the music and how it's too loud but doesn't do anything about it, so you take him outside for a stroll in the little botanical garden

despite the nice, peaceful atmosphere of the garden, you guys do eventually have to regroup with everyone else gathered out on the lawn to watch fireworks and tighnari is doing is absolute best to stall

"....eh, we can see just fine from here, no?" he says as he pulls you down next to him onto the bench he's sitting on. if he plays his next cards right, maybe... you'll even rest your head on his shoulder?

KAVEH

he asks you if he can come as your date to the wedding because he loves these sorts of events and you agree because it’s always a fun time with kaveh

neither of you want to be dd so somehow… somehow he ropes his ‘annoying roommate’ into driving you two there and back

makes sure both of you are dressed to the 9's; maybe he wants to upstage the wedding party because he arrives in a satin suit and his shirt is unbuttoned dangerously low. some poor relative has to take a million photos of the two of you until he likes it, and then some more ‘just in case’

shows off some of his architectural work from his phone; even gets a few inquiries from your rich relatives for future jobs. networking king

once it hits cocktail hour, you’re taking a shot together. his arm is around your waist and that’s where it stays the entire time you guys are mingling with others

drinks a little too much and gossips about your family a little too loud though, so you've gotta reel him in even though you're not too far behind

drags you onto the dance floor and is a fun, but messy, dancer. you guys are in almost all the candid shots the photographer takes

on the drive back his roommate makes an extremely sharp turn and you find yourself thrown into kaveh. physics, am I right. you’re apologizing profusely even though he insists it’s fine and that you should, in fact, just stay in that position, your body against his

throws up in the car after you get dropped off and the next morning you wake up to a slew of messages from him complaining about how his roommate is so cruel for making him clean his car at 7am with zero regard for his hangover

DAINSLEIF

he agrees to go but panics the week of and keeps asking you if you're sure you want to take him as your date even though it's been rsvp'd for ages

maybe not the most fun date, but overall not a bad date

offers you an arm when you two go somewhere together, holds your hand through a crowd, pulls your chair out for you during the reception, etc

brought you one of every dessert from the buffet and risked looking like an absolute glutton because

“you said to bring you a dessert, but didn’t specify which one”

he’s very sweet to the older guests; they are swooning and keeps winking and telling you he's a keeper. you don’t have the heart to tell them you’re not even dating

gives random unsolicited advice and it’s always a hit or miss

he is so awkward in the photobooth because he doesn’t know what to do? it takes 4 photos in one strip and he looks the same in 3 of them. finally on the last one you do the thing where you lift up the corners of his mouth so he’s at least smiling

keeps his copy in his wallet for a long time, maybe even forever who knows

you never thought him to be a dancer so you’re a little surprised when he asks you to slow dance; even more so at the fact that he is very good at it??

you follow his lead, and dancing with dainsleif is honestly such a tender moment. if not for the color of your clothing, people might have mistaken you two as the newly weds, what with the way he’s looking at you while you rest your head against his chest

you see him crack a sliver of a smile when you catch the bouquet and you think that he’s just happy you won. but he knows full well what it insinuates especially when everyone’s clapping him on the back in congratulations

DOTTORE

you only ask him if he's your absolute last option because why in your right mind would you take dottore as your date to a family wedding. he only agrees to go as 'an experiment'

pick out his outfit please lest he wear one of his funky little suits

introduces himself as dr. and he's so dramatic about it so a lot of people are fawning over him; you suppose all families love a doctor but only you know that he's technically not even legally allowed to practice medicine

scowls behind you when an old family friend starts talking to you for a bit too long. excuses himself to socialize with said friend, but then you wonder why hardly anyone else approaches you the rest of the night

insists on you wearing his suit jacket because he doesn't want you to 'catch a cold' uh huh okay doctor

he makes the 7-year old flower girl cry at the reception but the thing is, he wasn't even trying? everything he says sounds vaguely threatening and kids are just terrified of him

so first of all he makes it very clear that he's doing this for you okay; he will make it up to you by doing some simple science party tricks for the kids

.... except he way overdoes it and sets off a mentos/soda rocket into the ceiling

and he’s not even sorry; he’s actually proud of that little demonstration like ‘go little rockstar.’ you’re forced to leave early in shame

he does go down as a family urban legend though because aunties will say "if you don't behave, the scary doctor will come get you!”

With so many new characters, I feel like part 3 has been long overdue!