Crowley + Being Unable To Refuse Aziraphale.

if i’m ever brutally murdered and everyone feels like they need to do something productive in my memory, all i want is for you to pass legislation banning LED headlights in my name. regardless of how irrelevant it is to my murder. it’s relevant to my heart.

Ha ha been there Brucie

Dick: *showing off a cute childhood picture to the family* Oh this one is my favorite! Bruce looks so surprised here, haha! I busted into the bathroom and he almost screamed! It was so funny.

Damian: I can’t imagine Baba getting scared from something so… menial

Jason: Shit was a lot different back then kid. I once scared the old man when. I once scared him in the Batcave when he was examining a gun from a case. Weirdly enough he didn’t get mad at me. I’m pretty sure there’s a picture of that too, it’s in here somewhere. *starts flipping through a photo album*

Tim: *grabbing his own photo album* I noticed that! Sometimes Bruce gets pretty weird and startled easily. Still haven’t figured it out… I bet Steph also had a bunch of stories of the same thing

Bruce: *walk in to the living room* What are you all doing? Hopefully not causing any trouble.

Dick: *grinning widely and pulling Bruce to sit down near him* Nah, not this time. We’ve just been going through a lot of old pictures! See! *shows Bruce the picture*

Bruce: *squints at picture before frowning* Oh, I remember that. I was in the middle of a suicide attempt and you caught me

Dick: WHAT! *coughing and sputtering*

Bruce: Yes, see the knife by the bathtub? And the bottle of pills near the toilet? Dropped them when you busted in. I thought you knew?

Jason: *absolutely shocked* Pops… what the hell???

Bruce: *glances over at the picture Jason found* That one too. I was going to turn the gun on myself.

Jason: *looks down at picture in horror*

Bruce: *grabs the photo album from Tim’s hand and flips through it* About half of these are interrupted attempts lol. The other albums probably have more. *shrugs*

Damian: *teary eyed* Baba…

Bruce: *already moving Damian onto his lap and hugging him tightly* Oh no sweetie, it’s okay. I’m… I’m trying to get better. I’m sorry I really thought you all knew…

Tim: *hides his face in Bruce’s shoulder while hugging him* I should’ve noticed. I’m sorry…

Bruce: No Tim, this is never and will never be your fault. It’s not your job to take care of me, even if I did push it on you when we first met. None of you have done anything wrong.

Jason: *voice breaking* B-but…

Dick: W-we could’ve… *tearing up*

Bruce: Done absolutely nothing. I was in a dark place long before I met any of you, even being with Alfred didn’t help.

Dick: I still can’t believe I never noticed… w-what happened to you after I left? After Jason died?

Bruce: Let’s not talk about that, it’ll only make us all upset.

Jason: *flipping through photo album and scrutinizing every photo* Y-you look so gaunt in these… I’ve never noticed…

Bruce: *chuckles awkwardly and slowly pulls album out of Jason’s hands* Yeah, that’s what an eating disorder will do to you. And coke…*mutters*

Tim: Fuck…

Dick: What was that last part?

Bruce: Nothing, anyways… let’s stop talking about this, okay? I made brownies.

Damian: *still sniffling* Okay Baba… can we have ice cream too?

Bruce: *chuckles softly, smiling fondly at all his sons* Of course, cmon, before Alfred finds out.

David Tennant deserves so much praise for the physical comedy in his Crowley performance. The man absolutely understood his assignment as a demon that used to take a snake form; he exudes wiggles and chaos. If that’s not art I don’t know what is

we're seeing black pete and lucius reunite tomorrow. if you even care.

I loved it when the Barbie movie was like.. "this Barbie is having an existential crisis right now and she's supposed to look kinda ugly to reflect that, but we hired Margot Robbie so.. y'know, use your imagination"

And not a brain cell

the Literacy Duo, as i like to call them

"came back wrong" but it's from work

Oh Crowley, nothing lasts forever

how it feels to know all that we intend was built on sand