Randomhedgie - Proud Hedgie Mom

Don't forget when Joe Hills called Dream a child

the hermits fucking hate dream's ass btw like they do not like him and you should be embarrassed if you think otherwise

TeamFortress Classic Spy

One thing I would've changed about the 7th TF2 comic would've been to keep the mercs as mercs instead of them (or some of them) fully giving it up.

Like, instead of working for whatever the hell Mann Co ended up doing, they became a group of mercenary freelancers together like how the Team Fortress Classic mercs did.

For example, Spy and Engineer (or maybe even Miss Pauling) being in charge of accepting jobs and assigning themselves and the others to what specific job the assignment needs.

Rich guy needs a bodyguard for a week? Get Heavy and keep Sniper on standby just in case.

Need someone assassinated and another guy framed? Engie just finished upgrading Spys disguise kit!

Need a building burnt to the ground with no survivors? The mercs are already drawing straws for who gets to supervise Pyro this time.

All the while, they're also raising their kids/baboon as mercs, too! (All right, kids, who's ready to learn how to do medicine with Uncle Ludwig!) Soldiers' daughter already knows how to snap necks, Scouts blonde son looks like he bites, and I'm honestly surprised no one's drawn Scouts daughter Tanya as a Spy yet.

I really do love the ending of Comic 7, but I'm just saying, a work-balance exists.

(I also would've had Heavy and Medic wear wedding rings, but that's just me)

USERNAME LORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW YOU ALL

All of this is straight fire 🔥

Future Plot Ideas: 9/24

Even MORE future ideas! Obviously major spoilers are ahead, so read at your discretion. Not all of these ideas are finalized, they may change a lot between now and the final drafts. I also don't have an exact timeline for these events yet. These are mostly character-focused.

You can see more ideas here.

Text under the cut:

LUKAS

Azura and Jelani hire Lukas to paint murals all over Uekoro, honoring the historic abolishment of slavery. These murals get the attention of visiting foreign nobles, who then hire Lukas to decorate their own territories. At some point Lukas starts making more money on these art commissions than mercenary work, and decides it's time to finally transition out of the mercenary life like he always wanted to.

He retires as a mercenary, but still calls Drifter's Hollow his home. He reaches a point where he can make designs at home, then send his team of apprentices to do the grunt work for him. Sometimes he travels to oversee the projects, but mostly he's at home working on other stuff, like his writing career. Azura hires him to write a biography about Zov for her anti-Evangeline exhibition, among other things. Maybe also an embarrassing tell-all book about her mother, just to ruffle some feathers?

AZURA

Azura gathers a lot of valuable intel from Zov that she uses to launch an attack on Evangeline Kingdom. Zov is the longest-surviving pit fighter in history, and with his goblin memory, he's able to perfectly recall the layouts and security weaknesses of every major fighting arena in Evangeline Kingdom. Azura passes this intel along to her troops of Liberators, who storm the arenas during tournaments and rescue hundreds of pit fighting slaves.

These slaves are all tough as nails, pissed off, augmented with surgeries to make them stronger, and highly skilled in combat. Most of them end up joining a special forces unit in the Folkvaran military, and prove to be a huge thorn in Evangeline's side later. The Evangeline economy takes another big fat L from the raids, and the war officially starts tipping in Folkvar's favor.

EVAN

Lukas stepped down as Evan's commander to pursue his art career, and Evan is finding less motivation to keep doing mercenary work without him, especially as his heart troubles continue to get worse. His health forces him to cut way back on the action, and he resigns himself to the paperwork side of things while he lets the younger generation of Good Guys take over.

Evan can't stand this paper-pushing lifestyle for long though, so he makes a point to take frequent vacations and trains the younger mercenaries daily. Passing on his knowledge to the new generation gives him purpose, even if he can't get in on the action himself anymore. Once in a great while, the crew encounters a beast of a mission and he's forced to come out of retirement for a contract or two. Other than that, he just chills and learns to enjoy the simple life with Lukas.

BUDDY AND JENNIE

Buddy lives at the Temple of Love and Light in Taybiya, earning a position as Patience's assistant. They love their new life and are eager to spring out of bed each day to help Allkind. Though they were once conflicted, they now understand the evil of the Crescent Cult and have fully turned their back on Goryx, just as Lily turned her back on Dario.

Buddy still has significant physical and intellectual disabilities from their "upbringing" in the agony cradle, but they are getting stronger with daily therapy from the priestesses, and they understand Karenza's teachings better than most people. They are the most eager and dedicated Karenzan in the temple. Patience is very much a mother-figure to them, but Lily and Zov are also supportive and Buddy considers them their family.

One night, Buddy hears Lily crying out and thinks she's in danger, so they come barreling into her bedroom...only to find her and Zov having sex. But Buddy's only exposure to "sex" before this were the violent rapes that occurred daily in the Crescent Cult, so they have no understanding that it can be a good thing. They believe Zov is attacking her, so they tackle Zov and trap him in a chokehold, trying to give Lily a chance to escape. Zov has a bad temper and normally something like this would really piss him off...but it doesn't, because he's too impressed by Buddy's chokeholding technique, and also proud of their courage in trying to keep Lily safe.

Zov decides Buddy has combat potential and begins teaching them what he learned from years of pit-fighting. Buddy may be crippled, but they learn to make the most of what they've got, as Zov taught them the dirtiest tricks in the books to take down opponents much bigger than themselves. After a few months of training, Buddy becomes a little ass-kicker that everyone underestimates.

Lily and Zov eventually marry and adopt a goblin toddler named Jennie. Buddy is extremely protective of Jennie, because their only experience with children previously was watching the Crescent Cult throw them in agony cradles, and they can't bear the thought of this happening to her.

Zov and Lily are doing as well as one could hope, but still suffer from periods of intense mental illness from time to time. When Zov is psychotic and Lily is crippled by depression, Buddy acts as Jennie's guardian until her parents get better. Jennie is a curious girl who likes to sneak out of the temple, dragging Buddy along on all sorts of wacky shenanigans. Let's just say their combat training comes in handy.

ALAINE

Alaine finds herself inexplicably slowing down and feeling ill. Her folk remedies aren't working, and it reaches it point where she can barely do her job anymore, so she seeks real treatment. Dr. Che suspects it's something beyond his scope, so the crew takes her to a hospital in Zareen Empire. Sadly, she is diagnosed with cancer. This is not surprising to her, as she did grow up in one of the most polluted areas on Looming Gaia, where such a thing is common.

The good news is, Zareen Empire is well-equipped to deal with cancer and she is expected to survive with proper treatment. The bad news is, treatment will take a long time and she will not be able to do mercenary work or return to the Hollow until it's over. Even though he despises Zareen Empire, Glenvar volunteers to stay there with Alaine and care for her until she gets better.

This period tests the absolute limits of their relationship, and it's the thing that finally convinces Glenvar to stop drinking and take his relationship with Alaine seriously. They both have a lot of personal growth by the end of it.

BALTHAZAAR AND AZADORA

After Talzihaar, Eleza, and Alzira's deaths in the Crescent Cult terrorist attack, Naima and Riza move to the Hollow. Initially, Balthazaar tells Azadora that Naima is his sister and her aunt. But eventually he's forced to confess the truth, as he falls in love with Naima and they get married. Azadora learns the truth about her real parents and she's devastated that Balthazaar would lie to her for so many years. She wants to set out on a personal quest to find Allmother and get more answers about her past.

Balthazaar becomes too old and out of shape for mercenary work anymore. He retires to become a horse rancher while Naima and Ginger run the Hollow's first official schoolhouse together, taking shifts teaching kids and adults alike.

Balthazaar is disappointed in Azadora's decision to become a mercenary, but respects her wishes and doesn't stop her. He and Naima focus on pushing Riza through college so she can one day be the educated breadwinner of the family.

JAVAAN

After living a dishonorable life, Javaan meets an honorable death in battle defending his friends from the Crescent Cult. Whatever issues the FGG had with him are buried in the past, and he goes down in their memories as a hero. Ranger honors his father by taking his place in the FGG and using all the skills he taught him.

THE KIDS

Now with so much of the old guard out of commission, the Freelance Good Guys are in serious need of hands. Isaac takes Evan's place as captain and appoints Azadora as his commander. Evan even graduates some of the young mercenaries-in-training early and approves them for easy contracts to start with.

The crew now consists of Isaac, Azadora, Elska, Skel, Linde, Jeimos, Jasenia, Zacry, Frederick, Ranger, Trip (Mr. Ocean's "daughter"), and Nora. Cinnamon is still too young to join contracts, but is an aspiring mercenary-in-training.

GINGER AND FAMILY

Ginger is running the new schoolhouse with Naima, bringing a solid education to the new migrants trickling in to Drifter's Hollow. Itchy's candy has been catching on over the years, until one day a Zareenite businessman buys his recipe for a big chunk of money. Itchy and Ginger use the money to send Tomato to a fancy boarding school in Sodergen for a few years. There he meets two boys named Kast and Thetos...

Cinnamon is growing into a foul-mouthed little menace. She has Ginger's intelligence, Itchy's deviousness, and she's a telepathic prodigy, which is a recipe for disaster. She weaponizes her disabilities to manipulate people and also uses her telepathy to get what she wants. She's spiraling into a successful criminal career, so in an act of desperation, Itchy and Ginger send her to Evan's boot camp and she begins training to be a mercenary.

Hanging around the Good Guys does eventually straighten her out, and she learns to use her powers for good...mostly. But she will always have that little devious streak she inherited from her father. Her advanced skills in magic give her a big ego, and she's prone to getting herself into situations over her head. She looks through other peoples' eyes using telepathy and communicates almost totally telepathically. When she does communicate verbally, it's usually to curse at someone.

OLOF

One day while working a contract in Folkvar Kingdom, Elska and Frederick recognize Olof's wife, Haldora! They know her by her facial tattoos and missing finger. She was rescued from Evangelite slavery by Azura's liberators, and is now married to Steel-Breaker (the centaur who refused to breed with Elska in "Unbreakable", appeared again in "Blue Boy", and would later become a Red Liberator troop leader)

They take her back to the Hollow to visit Olof. Olof refused to remarry until he knew her fate, and he's disappointed to learn that she did not do the same for him. Haldora is hardened by years of slavery trauma and is obsessed with seeing Evangeline Kingdom fall. She tries to recruit Frederick and Olof into the Folkvar military, and is disappointed by their "cowardice" when they refuse.

Olof realizes this is not the same woman he married anymore and sadly watches her return to Folkvar Kingdom. On the bright side, he finally knows her fate and he realizes it's a relief, because now he can finally move on with his life. He opens his heart to love again.

LINDE AND JEIMOS

Jeimos' rich-billionaire-daddy Ojio agrees to make a huge donation to the Order of Love and Light, but only if Austerity helps Jeimos with their gender issues. Austerity agrees and gives Jeimos a female-to-male transformation. Jeimos feels much more at ease with this new male body and decides to celebrate by making love to Linde...only to get her pregnant. They didn't think such a thing was possible, but it seemed Austerity's transformation was truly flawless!

Neither of them are ready to be parents, but Linde already had one abortion in her past and can't stomach another, so they decide to do their best. Linde gives birth to a healthy child, which the whole village helps to raise. They name him Cygnio, after a character from Star Rangers, because Jeimos is a big hopeless nerd who can't help themselves.

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I might post some more ideas later, but that's what I have for now. If you guys have any objections or suggestions please let me know! I'm always open to new ideas and criticisms!

*

Questions/Comments?

Lore Masterpost

Read the Series

This entire part fucked me up so bad why is nobody talking about it

"MOMMY! DADDY! I JUST WANNA GO HOME!!!!"

OMG????? IT SOUNDS SO GREAT ALREADY!!

Redo's and Rememberance

A snip pit of the fic !'m writing that's heavily based on @randomhedgie SWTD Au!

(Cut from the middle)

“Gregor I wasn't stationed near the helipad yesterday, I was in engineering?” 

The rig shook violently, followed by the roar of screeching metal as the rig swayed. The crates slammed into his shoulder. His foot slipped when another explosion shook the rig, he saw archie holding onto the helicopter.   

“Gregor? What's wrong-” 

Caz is running towards him, when did he get here? Gregors hands are slipping. air is whipping at his face the ocean waves roar in his ears, he’s falling and then- 

“GREGOR”  

He chokes, his lungs filling with water air faster than his brain can catch up. The wind whips at his face as he falls, his body crashing to the floor. He doesn't know when his legs gave out under him or his hands gripped the sides of his head to try and muffle the roar of rushing blood in his ears 

Whatever happened to hello or how are you?

Sorry ..........