huge fan of reading and learning, but also an even bigger fan of sleeping and being unconscious.
I NEED THIS BIBLICALLY PLEASE
I DID SOMETHING ACCIDENTALLY đđ
Maxsplaining and Leclerifying, my beloved.
die for you.
ln x driver!reader
in which you canât stand each other, or so you sayâŚ
this took waaaay too long for me to hate it sm but sheâs here! and sheâs long! love this concept so much, thank you for this request. so many feels so many vibes, tell me what you think <3
loosely inspired by die for you by the weeknd
warnings: 18+!! minors dni!! smut, language, slight glimpses of she fell first, he fell harder, rivals to lovers/enemies to lovers, choking, hate sex? bar fight, mentions of blood
8.3k words (oop)
itâs rare that you miss a podium, so when you do, it tastes bitter and stings like a bitch.
the car has been on fire all season long, a thing of beauty in your calculated hands. so, the string of bad luck youâre enduring, small mistakes with big consequences, itâs quite the pill to swallow.
out of the car you jump, teeth grinding hard out of frustration. you could see the commotion ahead of you, members of the papaya team celebrating their driver. your eyes roll so hard in your head that you feel a lasting ache. you side step members of your team, dodging every single person that tries to talk to you, your comms officer knowing better than to try and engage with you. you know youâre being unreasonable, it was a p5 finish! but it isnât a podium or a win, so quite frankly, you arenât interested, and you certainly donât have any energy left to hear how amazingly well he had driven.
lando fucking norris.
what was once quiet disdain had grown into fully fledged hatred and you fear youâll be violently sick if you catch a single glimpse of him on the podium. sure, heâs talented, and sure, heâs beautiful, you suppose. that doesnât mean you have to like him. not anymore. he lives under your skin, inescapable.
you struggle through every interview in the media pen, most of which dissect your recent fall from grace, your mouth forming a hard, unimpressed line every time they mention the orange goblin and his recent streak of podiums and good luck. you wish the journos would bring up his string of women and the probable plan b receipts that went with them. that, you would love to talk about.
you drive in silence back to your hotel, leaving the track as soon as possible, and quickly find solace in your bed for the night. the idea of seeing the inside of a club makes you nauseous after your epic downfall. as your eyes are drooping, your body going limp under the thick duvet, a knock sounds from the door.
âno.â you shout flatly, but the only response you get are giggles from the hallway. for fuck sake, you mutter, groaning as you shift out from beneath the covers and trail apprehensively towards the door.
george and alex appear before you, and you throw your head back is exasperation.
âmate, itâs 9:30.â alex laughs, taking in your fancy attire; pyjamas that youâve had since you were 17.
âwhatâs your point?â you croak, glaring up at your obnoxiously tall friend.
âwhy arenât you getting ready to go out?â george questions, leaning against the doorframe. he, too, was obnoxiously tall, you thought, feeling the strain in your neck as you move your glare onto him.
âif it wasnât obvious, iâm not going.â you deadpan, crossing your arms over your chest. âi thought that was clear after i ignored all 77 of your texts.â you smile sarcastically, rubbing sleep from your eyes.
âdonât be boring! youâre an f1 driver, youâre in a cool city, youâre rich and, letâs face it,â he sasses. âyou need to get laid.â alex says, like itâs the most causal thing in the world. your eyes bulge out of your head at the utterance of the last bit. george bites back laughter.
âchoosing to ignore that.â you hiss. âiâm sorry but i refuse to go out and celebrate that arrogant, whiny little bitch.â
they both know exactly who youâre talking about.
you and lando have simply never seen eye to eye. your karting days were spent pushing one another off the track or into a muddy puddle if things got a bit heated out of the car. sure, olive branches were extended, and maybe adolescent feelings were secretly harboured, but he never gave you any reason to tell him that. youâd grown out of the childish violence when you graduated into formula 1, but you hadnât been able to shake the rage he made you feel.
it didnât matter how many dinners you attended where others had conspired and forced you to sit next to each other. it didnât matter how many times you turned up to play padel and were met with the same lame excuses of âoh, did we not mention lando would be here?â it didnât matter how many times youâd hugged it out on the podium while adrenaline and tensions were running high.
it didnât matter how many times heâd watched you from across a crowded room and youâd found his eyes, watched him back. it didnât matter how many times heâd smirked at you at the start of a race weekend, made you blush. and it certainly didnât matter what happened last time you found yourself in a club with him.
you just donât like him. not anymore. you sleep better at night when you lie to yourself.
~ the last time
you sink shot after shot, cocktail after cocktail; the taste of fruity liquor stains your lips and burns your throat. you feel electric, sizzling with ecstasy and the heat from the flashing lights above your head.
itâs approaching 4am and you canât recall a time in your life where youâd felt so fucking good. the high of your first win is indescribable.
youâve lost track of the guys, alex and george have packed it in and gone back to their hotels with their girlfriends. pierre and kika are somewhere in a corner, youâre certain. youâre pretty sure youâve even seen lewis with his entourage and a brick wall of a bodyguard trailing behind him. and at the bar, a set of eyes watch you.
lando isnât even listening to oscar anymore, no. he is too entranced in the way your hips move to the beat, lost in the carefree lines your body makes in the crowd. heâs itching to go to you, put his hands in places that would stay between you, him, and god, but he doesnât think a broken nose would be good for business.
everything changes when you spin around, facing his direction. then, it begins: the same thing that happens every time you end up going out in the same group. you watch one another, pretending youâre not both achingly desperate to find out how the other tastes.
but lando is feeling bold. he tells oscar heâll see him in the morning, and then, egged on by a moscow mule and a few too many shots, he makes his way towards you. it is instinctual, magnetic, the way he is drawn to you.
hands on your hips, lips on your neck. the song changes. you recognise the weekndâs voice. you are disappointed in yourself but it feels too good to stop.
you know what iâm thinkin', see it in your eyesâ¨you hate that you want me, hate it when you cryâ¨youâre scared to be lonely, 'specially in the nightâ¨iâm scared that iâll miss you, happens every time
the lyrics sober you up. youâre in the first taxi you can see when you finally get outside.
alone.
~
as much as that memory makes you shiver, for several different reasons, you find yourself putting on some makeup and raking through your suitcase for something to wear. george and alex are waiting downstairs for you at the bar, and when you finally make your way down there, they have a martini waiting for you. they watch in impressed horror as the alcohol disappears from the glass mere seconds after it touches your lips.
âletâs get this over with.â you sigh.
-
it could have been worse, you suppose.
the club is packed, hundreds of faces blurring into nothing. you feel better knowing that there is a one in a million chance of running into lando.
youâre tucked into a booth with alex and george, carmen and lily, a few faces you canât quite place, and charles and pierre. youâd conspired to sit on the outside, prepared to make a quick getaway at the first sign of tension.
youâd been in a state of fight or flight since your last run in, nails bitten down every time you thought about his hands on you, how good they felt on you. it scared you more than anything had in a long time, how your desire had festered.
you go to take a swig from your glass, only to find it empty, aside from a few sad ice cubes. you watch jealously as they melt into nothing, wishing they would take you with them, shoving your glass across the smooth table top when your frustration boils over.
youâre on edge, ridiculously afraid of bumping into a curly haired man. it wasnât him you were scared of, per-say, more yourself. god knows what youâd do if you felt those warm, calloused hands pulling your hips into his again.
âyou okay?â pierre calls across the table. he and charles abandon their conversation as soon as your glass goes flying towards their side of the table. youâre broken out of your trance, caught off guard like a deer in headlights.
âtired.â you reply, shrugging it off like it was nothing. itâs clear immediately that they donât buy it.
âsheâs hiding.â alex chimes in from beside you, and your elbow goes straight into his ribs. he feigns pain for a moment, cackling at your reaction.
âfrom who?â charles inquires. you roll your eyes, blush spreading down your neck already. you hate everything about the conversation, and yet you need to see where it goes. youâd planned your escape, and now was the opportune time to make it, but you seem to be glued to the leather of the booth.
âlando.â george smirks into his drink as a he speaks, wiggles his eyebrows.
âoh yeah, we know all about that.â pierre laughs, his head tipping back in amusement.
âwhat?â you spit, eyes wide with confusion.
âdonât think me and kika didnât see you two before the summer break. that night you won? we thought youâd finally cave.â pierre explains, his grin conveying pure evil.
several âwhat?!ââs sound from around the table, and now all eyes are on you.
ânothing even happened.â you mumble. âhe came over to me and then i left.â you look away, twisting your hair around your finger. you are sweating.
âyou looked like you were minutes away from being arrested for public indecency.â pierre smirks. you almost launch yourself across the table, intent on strangling him, and then perhaps throwing yourself in front of an oncoming uber outside.
âwell, well, well. i fucking knew it.â alex is giggling beside you.
âcome on guys, leave the poor girl alone.â lily winks at you, but even she has a twinkle in her eye. âthereâs obviously feelings there.â and just like that she betrays you. her sympathetic smile doesnât make you forgive her.
âi think you guys just need to get it out of your system,â charles starts, pausing to take a sip of his drink. âjust fuck.â he waves his hand, like it was the most causal thing in the world.
the table erupts in laughter and you decide that you are well past the end of your tether. you shake your head, declaring that you need another drink, or ten, and strut away from the table. a chorus of âlove youâ-s and âget someâ-s sound from behind you. you reply simply by raising your middle finger and refusing to look back.
the bar is in sight, just about in your reach when your evening goes from mildly bad to aggressively worse.
âfuck sake.â you sigh.
âand good evening to you too.â lando replies. heâs blocking your path, materialising before you out of nowhere.
âget out of my way, lan.â it sounds like youâre pleading and you cringe internally.
âdonât you wanna congratulate me?â he feigns a pout and you almost swing for him.
âno, not particularly.â you say dryly. âall i want is a drink, so if youâd justâŚâ you gesture for him to move. of course, he doesnât.
âhavenât seen you in a while, though. thought maybe youâd missed me.â he takes a step closer; goosebumps litter your bare skin.
âyou are such an entitled prick.â you spit, moving to step around him but he catches you, gripping your wrists and pulling you in. you feel heat radiating off of him, expensive cologne overwhelming you in the best possible way.
âand you, honey, are such a fucking brat. but you donât hear me complaining, do you?â lando whispers, cool breath hitting your face, minty, laced with champagne and cockiness. you almost fold, thighs clenching so tight that he must have noticed.
âmove.â you grumble through gritted teeth. you are crumbling painfully, embarrassingly fast.
âmake me.â your underwear is damp, but you are fuming.
âdonât fucking test me, lando.â something in your chest sets on fire and youâre over him and his bullshit, and the way he makes you feel.
âi know you want me.â he dips his forehead down to rest gently against yours. his grip on your wrists tightens, thumbs swirling circles into the flesh, right where your pulse is.
you lean in, mere centimetres separating your lips. his eyes darken, the assumption of victory over you tugs his lips into a smirk.
âall i want is my fucking drink. come find me when youâve managed to navigate your gigantic, stupid head out of your arse.â you catch him off guard, wriggling out of his grip. youâre shaking when you walk away, thoughts of doing things with him that would get you both fired invading your foggy brain.
you try to disappear into the crowd, finally breathe a sigh of relief when your hands meet the cool surface of the bar. you order your drink, putting it on your tab and drum your nails against the marble top. youâre lost in your own world, watching as concoctions are mixed, as shots are downed. you finally feel at ease, until your evening takes yet another turn, one that was somehow even more unfortunate than all the others.
your attention is rudely stolen by the guy stood next to you.
âcan i get that for you?â the random man speaks, in a way that he must of assumed was smooth. slimy, you think. heâs gesturing to your drink, clearly having watched you add it to your bill already.
âno, thank you. itâs already paid for.â you smile politely, turning on your heel. it seems he wasnât quite done with you. you feel a clammy hand tug on yours, a wave of sickness washes over you.
landoâs hands are bigger, warmer, softer.
âwhere are you rushing off to, babe?â the sweaty man asks, his tone fake in a way that makes you uneasy.
âi need to get back to my friends.â you try to pull your hand free, but he wonât budge. âcan you let go-â
âi can show you a good time. always thought you were kinda hot.â youâre panicking now, looking every which way for a familiar face, a security guard, anyone.
âtake your hands off of me.â you snap, still wrestling to pull yourself free.
âone night with me would pull you out of that little slump youâre in.â he leers. you visibly gag, white hot rage blurs your vision.
âokay you piece of shi-â you snarl, interrupted by a flash of curls and tanned skin.
âshe told you to let go.â lando stands in front of you protectively, rigid and furious. youâve never been so happy to see his annoying(ly beautiful) face.
âand what are you gonna do?â
âhands. off.â lando stands up even straighter, looking bigger than youâve ever seen him.
âokay, mate, whatever.â the stranger rolls his eyes, shoves your hand away.
lando turns to you, opening his mouth to speak whenâŚ
âkeep that stuck up bitch all to yourself.â
and then, everything goes to shit.
lando whips around, fists are flying, the stranger topples to the ground, amassed to nothing in the face of the mclaren drivers rage. lando doesnât stop there, makes sure he is sufficiently dealt with, flat on his back on the sticky floor. you donât know what to do, calling out for lando, begging him to stop, as satisfied as you are. lando hears your shouts, pulled out of the chaos and back to you. always back to you.
âare you okay?â he has his hands on your face searching for any remaining fear or upset. a crowd has formed and you see alex and george towering above the other club goers, jaws agape.
itâs as if he dj has it out for you, and you realise that the song has changed to something moodier, slower, one that gives you whiplash.
even though we're going through itâ¨and it makes you feel aloneâ¨just know that i would die for youâ¨baby, i would die for you
âwe need to get out of here. security are coming.â you mutter, keening into his touch.
âi have a car outside.â
âwell, letâs use it then.â
-
you canât help but stroke over his knuckles mindlessly in the car, an unlikely comfortable silence settling between you. they look raw, cracked slightly and you have an overwhelming desire to kiss them better. your head is fuzzy, and youâre unsettled with confusion, but at the same time, you feel lighter.
âwhy did you do that?â you murmur, disrupting the quiet that has settled over the backseat of the town car, the question burning desperately on your tongue.
lando turns his head so that heâs looking down at you, his good hand comes up to cup your jaw softly.
âno one can talk to you like that.â heâs staring so deeply into your eyes and you almost squirm at the intensity. you feel exposed, bare.
âbut why did you step in before that?â you reiterate shakily. lando hums in understanding.
âiâve known you since we were 10 years old. i know when youâre scared.â he whispers, breath dusting your cheeks. you almost lean in, then, something about his words pull you even closer towards him. you feel warmth creeping over your chest, sinking into the pit of your belly.
âweâve arrived.â the driver calls from the front, signalling that you need to get out of the car. it was like an elastic band had snapped, and you spring away from lando, scrambling to undo your seat belt, the moment of weakness long gone.
you sneak into the lobby, on the lookout for any angry PR teams or incognito photographers that are scoping for their next pay check. the coast seems clear, so you manage to scurry discreetly into the elevator. you hit the button for the third floor.
âcan you hit the button for five?â lando asks, leaning against the opposite wall.
âyouâre coming to my room.â you state, offering no other explanation, even when he raises his eyebrows.
the ding of the lift has lando pushing himself off of the mirrored wall, trailing behind you into the corridor. the lights are low as he follows you to your door, hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. he watches in anticipation as you rifle through your small bag for your keycard. the green light gives you the go ahead to open the door, and he awkwardly follows you inside, peering around the room.
you notice the slight apprehension in his features, eyes blown wide from alcohol and adrenaline. they seem to sparkle more than youâd seen in a while, a hazel-y blue twisting with secrets and unspoken thoughts.
âlet me find my first aid kit.â you tell him. you guide him towards the foot of your bed, gesture for him to sit. âmake yourself comfortable.â
âyou donât need to do this.â lando replies, sitting down anyway.
âand you didnât need to get between me and that dickhead but here we are.â
your words elicit a low chuckle from him, and youâre glad you have your back to him while you dig through your suitcase. he canât see your smile at the wholesome sound, and he doesnât need to.
random pieces of clothing fall out of the bag as you rummage through it, your attention taken up completely by your mission to find the small box. you donât notice the pile of garments littering the floor.
âwow, didnât take you for that kinda girl.â lando teases. your cheeks flame red when you catch sight of the cherry red thong that has managed to get caught in the wheel of your suitcase.
âshut up, iâm helping you.â you grumble, balling up the lace and burying it at the bottom of the case.
âwhy is it ferrari coloured? something you wanna tell me? do you think charles is⌠foxy? or is it fred? oh, i bet itâs fred, isnât it.â heâs laughing now, loud and boisterous, and if it wasnât for the butterflies erupting in your belly at the sound, you would have throttled him.
âiâll leave you to bleed out.â you tease back, pointing at the dried up blood across his knuckles.
âof course, i am in urgent need of medical attention!â he exclaims sarcastically, clutching his hand. you roll your eyes.
âyou know where the door is.â you stand from the floor, carrying a little square antiseptic wipe with you.
âyeah, i do. feel like staying now, though. iâm just so comfy.â
and with that, he throws himself back on your bed, closing his eyes as he sinks into the mattress.
you stare at him for a second, noticing the way his eyelashes dust the tops of his cheeks, his tanned, thick neck peeks out from in between the undone buttons of his dress shirt. you exhale shakily, moving to sit beside him on the bed.
âgive me your hand.â you instruct him, tearing the packet open and unfolding the wipe.
âromantic.â lando snarks. you shove his shoulder in response. he holds his hand out.
âwhatever.â you sigh, avoiding eye contact as you run the wipe over his knuckles. you can see how they are already tinged purple, wincing at the idea that it is your fault.
âwhat is it?â lando asks, noticing.
you donât respond. this proximity is odd, you canât quite tell yet if you like it. what you do know is that you certainly donât know how to handle him now that the alcohol is wearing off and youâre left tending to the wounds of a man that you could have sworn you didnât like.
âso thatâs how itâs gonna be? weâre going back to the silent treatment again?â lando scoffs.
âdonât know what to say.â you mutter, keeping your eyes trained on every line and indent of his knuckles.
âwhy do you hate me so much?â
âi donât.â
âyes, you do.â he scoffs.
âi donât think about you enough to hate you.â you lie. itâs cruel. he winces.
that shuts him up.
âiâm gonna go. thanks for this.â lando waves his hand and you feel a wave of guilt hit.
âno, fuck, iâm sorry.â you apologise, bowing your head. âstay.â
âiâll stay if you tell me why you hate me.â
âiâve never hated you, lan. havenât always particularly liked you but i never, ever hated you.â
âokay.â
thatâs all it takes for him to flop back onto the bed. some unexplainable instinct that you loathe has you crawling onto the bed beside him. you wrap your arms around your pillow, watching him watch you.
âi used to have such a big crush on you, you know.â lando says. you stare at him blankly.
âwhat?â
âyep. i think i was about 15. you were the first girl i ever really liked that way.â he smiles, recalling the memory. âit kinda sucked because i knew you wouldnât even look at me twice but itâs funny thinking back to that time.â
~ 15
he watches the way her hair gets caught in the breeze as she takes off her helmet. two messy braids are shaken free, and his heart skips a beat or two, or seven, when she turns around with the biggest grin on her face.
sheâs just won a race, another one, and heâd be so jealous if it wasnât her.
he thinks sheâs the most beautiful girl heâs ever seen. george and alex go over to her, congratulating her, hugging her. he wishes he could do that. he definitely canât.
she doesnât see him, the only times that she does are when they argue, when they push eachother off the track and scream at one another across a gravel trap. the times when she plants her pointed finger in his chest and calls him dirty, the times he gets heated and calls her something he doesnât mean under his breath. and she always hears him. always. he watches her eyes pool with tears every single time.
he wants her, in a way heâs never wanted anyone before. heâs never felt like this, wonders how he can make it go away. she hates him. she must.
he can never have her, so why even try?
~
âi had no idea you ever felt that way.â youâre quite shocked, really. you knew that you had this intensely charged sexual tension between you now, but you had failed to realise how far back this all went.
mutually, at least.
âiâd say iâve done a pretty good job of hiding it.â his smile changes slightly. it was now a sad smile, one that conveys disappointment in himself, and that you hated to see. it reminds you of the one youâve gotten used to seeing on your social media feed after heâd had a shitty race.
you sigh, bracing yourself for what you are about to say.
âyouâre not the only one who hid it.â you raise an eyebrow, your face says âguilty!â
âno?â landoâs eyes widen at your revelation.
âi think we were 13. you gave me half a cookie to apologise for pushing me off track.â you smile coyly. âitâs kinda sad but 13 year old me died inside.â you laugh.
âso, weâve both⌠liked each other.â lando assesses. you nod.
âwhen did you stop?â you inquire, scanning his face. you take in each detail, each individual freckle, the curve of his lips. he seems closer, all of the sudden, and thatâs when you realise youâve closed the space between you. lando is within reach now, it would have been so, so incredibly easy to shift even closer still; it was like you were in his gravitational field, reeled in by pretty, pretty eyes.
âwho said i stopped?â
âoh.â you breathe.
~ 13
he snaps the crumbly biscuit between his fingers, trails towards her awkwardly. he feels bad, feels a strange pang in his chest that he doesnât recognise.
he finds her around the back of her parents car, arms crossed, eyebrows scrunched, pouting hard. he thinks sheâs cute.
âwhy are you here?â she whines.
âthis is for you. i know it doesnât make up for the race. i didnât mean to take you out, i swear.â
he sounds panicked, sincere. her tummy turns funny.
heâs holding out a cookie, the childrenâs equivalent of an olive branch.
her face softens. she accepts it. they bite into their cookies at the same time.
itâs not the worst day in the world anymore.
~
messy kisses and soft whispers lull you to sleep.
his nose bumps yours every time your lips meet, gentle and plush.
you feel delicate in his arms, treasured. his lips press gently to your hairline. heâs different, softer than youâve seen him since you were teenagers splitting cookies.
itâs the easiest thing in the world to curl into his side, mould together until youâre part of him, and drift off.
-
the heat wakes you up.
you stir, eyes fluttering open, searching for the source of the onslaught of warmth. it clicks quickly, and you realise that you hadnât dreamt the events of the night before.
lando is in your bed.
lando had protected you.
lando had wanted you since you were stupid kids who didnât know any better.
he is the heater that had woken you up, and suddenly you donât care that youâre far too hot. you curl back into his side, head rests on his chest. it rises and falls softly, his heartbeat thrums beneath your ear. you are jealous of how pretty he looks when heâs asleep, relaxed and infatuating. you lose track of time, gazing up at him.
a sharp pain in your side makes you groan. you had fallen asleep in your dress, lando in his jeans and his shirt, and now youâre paying for it, your fingers searching for the zipper that was now digging into your side. your movements draw him out of his slumber, and when you look back at him, heâs watching you, rubbing sleep from his eyes.
âyou okay?â lando croaks, his voice deep and sleepy. it sends shockwaves through you.
âmhm. how did you sleep?â you ask, mindlessly running your hand over his jaw like it was the most natural thing in the world. a smile breaks out across his face, eyes fluttering shut once more.
âreally fucking well.â he laughs, almost in disbelief.
âyeah, me too.â you smile at him, shy.
âwhatâs bothering you?â
âwell, a human heater woke me up and now this fucking zipper is killing me.â you joke. itâs weird that this doesnât feel weird.
âi am pretty hot i guess.â
âyeah, yeah.â you roll your eyes and stand from the bed.
lando sits up, resting on his elbows. his eyes follow you as you walk around the room. you take a bottle of water, drinking half of it before passing it to him. his lips wrap around the bottle and you have to turn away, the ache between your legs that youâd been fighting for months rearing itâs irritating head. you clear your throat, composing yourself.
âneed to get this dress off.â
lando pulls himself off of the mattress, stalking towards you. you stop in your tracks and he meets you at the foot of the bed. his hands find your cheeks, thumbs smoothing over your skin in little circles, and then kisses you deeper than he did last night.
itâs impossible not to melt into him, hands running over his chest, his shoulders, and finally finding solace tangled in his curls. if someone told you the morning before that youâd wake up in landoâs arms, you would have cackled, urged them to seek medical attention, and probably spat in their face. how things change.
âi think you should keep it on, look so pretty.â lando breathes, staring down at you. you blush hard, leaning into him.
âbut iâm uncomfortable.â you grin coyly. and then, a surge of confidence has you whispering: âiâll let you take it off if you want.â
âlet me make you comfortable first.â lando murmurs, dipping his head down until it rests in the crook of your neck. âwant me to get you nice and comfortable, baby?â he kisses up your neck.
you cave, finally.
it takes him all of thirty seconds to have you spread out on his face, laying himself down on the mattress and pulling you on top of him so that youâre hovering over his lips. he mouthes at your panties for a second, getting his first taste of you, and then he drags them to the side, clearing a path. his tongue laves over your cunt, groaning as soon as he gets a proper taste.
your dress fans out over your thighs, and lando has disappeared beneath the fabric. you can tell heâs there, though, by the strong hands gripping onto your thighs, the tuft of curls peeking out, and the feeling of his nose bumping your clit as he buries his face deeper and deeper between your folds.
âlando.â you cry, throwing your head back. the straps of your dress are slipping down your arms, skimming your goosebump ridden skin. he just groans into your pussy in response, pulling you impossibly closer to his mouth, backwards and forwards until youâre grinding down on his willing tongue. you reach down blindly, grabbing one of his hands where it rests on your thigh, and your other threads through his hair, gripping tight as you revel in the pleasure.
lando pulls your clit between his teeth, grazing over the bud and youâre jolting, writhing above him. you feel like youâre going to die, heat pricking all over your skin, your tummy tight from the building orgasm. heâs so eager, sliding his entire face through your slippery folds, obscene sounds falling from his lips that ricochet through your quivering body.
tears prick your eyes when you finally let go, slumping forwards from the overwhelming sensation taking over every single nerve. he lifts you off of him, laying you back on the bed as you come down from your high.
âyou okay, baby?â he coos, brushing sweat dampened hair from your eyes.
his lips are stained, dark pink and shiny, a mixture of enthusiasm and your slick coating them. lando scans your watery eyes, feral at how fucked out you look all because of him, and tantalisingly licks his lips.
âneed you.â you moan, reaching out for him. his shirt is wrinkled where heâd slept in it and your shaky hands find the few buttons that are actually done up. you push the material off of his shoulders, pupils blown wide at the sight of his toned chest, at the feel of smooth, golden skin. you pull him in by the shoulders, swallowing him whole as you kiss him with everything youâve got left.
landoâs hands find your thighs once more, running his hands over them to push your dress up your hips.
âwanted this for so long.â he whispers into the kiss, pulling away so that he can take the dress off of you. he looks ravenous the more he pushes the fabric up your body.
you feel vulnerable under his intense gaze, watchful eyes taking in every movement you make. you try to pull him back in for another kiss but he resists.
âlet me look at you, please?â lando asks. âthere you go, baby, letâs get this off, hmm?â he sits you up so that he can get it over your head, and you lay back, bare aside from your panties that heâd left in disarray.
he sucks in a breath, raking his eyes over the curve of your lips, your collarbone, the slope of your breasts. his gaze lingers there for just a second, before continuing further over your belly, the length of your legs. you want to hide away, pull him in so that he canât look at you like this, or just dive under the duvet and stay there until you need to catch your flight.
âgod, youâre so, so fucking beautiful.â he gasps, awestruck. he sounds speechless, and you feel yourself going red again.
âcome here.â you whine. âneeded you for so long.â
your admission seems to kick him into action, because seconds later, heâs on top of you, fingers grazing the band of your underwear while you fiddle with the button on his jeans.
âgonna be good for me, arenât you?â lando stares you down, tone sending a shiver down your spine. you nod, batting your eyelashes. âwords, my love.â
âyes, lando.â you affirm, arching into him. thatâs all he needs to know, kicking his jeans away, boxers too.
âgood girl. took care of me so well last night, now âm gonna take such good care of you.â
your eyes skim his body, honing in on how hard he is. your hand finds his cock, tentative at first, stroking over it softly. itâs heavy in your hands, red and dripping already. he wants this just as bad as you do. you continue to jerk him off, watching the way his eyes squeeze shut and his lips part, soft pants falling out. a low hum sounds from the back of his throat, and you wet your lips, threading your free hand through his hair.
lando opens his eyes at the sensation, gently batting your hand away. he dips down even closer, resting on one of his forearms. he lines himself up and your legs wrap around him instinctively. slowly, he pushes inside of you, his breath catching in his throat.
âfucking hell.â he groans, deep and guttural, something carnal sending shockwaves through his body. âbeen dreaming about all the ways iâd get to fuck you.â
your eyes roll back and you go languid in his arms, feeling every inch of him slide against your slick walls.
âwant you.â you rasp, clinging to him, your fingernails leaving patterns between his taut shoulder blades as you beg for it.
âyou have me, baby.â and then he kisses you, messy and slow, stealing the air from your lungs. youâre dizzy when he pulls away, sitting back slightly to change the angle. you cry out, feeling him even deeper and everything is more sensitive, warm. you roll your hips, meeting his thrusts deliciously, and he chokes out a moan as you clamp around him. âyeah, thatâs it. fuck yourself like that for me.â he encourages.
this is all too much, too good. you have whiplash, physically and emotionally, eyes pooling with tears as the man youâd wanted so badly that you hated him for it rocks into you. lando hits the right spot every time he pistons his hips harder, and his nimble fingers slide up your abdomen, applying light pressure to your navel that makes you writhe.
âfucking perfect for me. gorgeous.â lando slurs, entranced by the sight of where youâre joined. he can see just how wet you are and it drives him insane, barrelling into you like a man possessed, drunk on every single way that your body responds to him.
his wandering hand finds your breast, kneading it before he traces your nipple. he watches the way it hardens at his manipulation, wetting his lips. he collapses back on top of you, sucking the bud into his mouth. youâre panting, whining beneath him as his tongue swirls over your chest, switching to the other side. you jolt, a silent scream scratching your throat when he slips his hand between your thighs, working your clit with the pad of his thumb. heâs rutting against you, grinding deeper, faster, uncontrollably.
âcome on, baby. youâre so close, so tight for me.â he mutters into your skin. you nod frantically, your words lost on you. he kisses over your collarbone, the base of your throat, until he finds your lips.
âso close.â you sigh.
he stops.
âtell me youâre all mine.â lando growls, his entire demeanour changing. the tone of his voice almost finishes you off but youâre suddenly enraged. youâre too close for him to stop.
âcâmon lando.â you hiss, trying to move your hips but he has you firmly in place.
âneed to hear you say it.â his hand slithers over your chest, finding a new home at the base of your throat. it makes you throb, the way his thick fingers wrap around you. slowly, his grip tightens, and you see an opportunity.
you buck your hips hard, whimpering at the sensation, but your plan works and now you hover over him. heâs still buried inside you, and you can feel him pulsing as you steal control.
âfor once in your life, honey, shut the fuck up.â you smirk, mischievous in victory.
slowly, you build up your rhythm. he feels bigger like this, deeper, and you almost lose yourself in the small circles you make with your hips.
âknew youâd be like this. you liked giving yourself to me but i just knew youâd need to take back control.â lando teases. his hand is back around your neck, squeezing slowly, and you grind frantically, dizzy for him. âi was right last night, wasnât i, baby? pretending to be my good girl when really,â he pulls you down so that youâre chest to chest. âyouâre just a fucking brat.â
lando holds you close as he fucks up into you, feeling the way you go limp on top of him as the pleasure washes over you like a million electric shocks. youâre crying, tears pooling on his chest, because there is nothing you can do, nothing you want to do, but take it. heâs got you right where he wants you, and youâre loving every fucking second of it.
âyeah, baby, take it how you want it.â lando commands through gritted teeth, and you move your hips in a feeble attempt to match his speed. everything is slippery, everything feels wet and flushed.
the power play, the position, the frenzy he seems to be in as he fucks you, it all has you gushing, spilling all over him. you choke out a sob, shuddering as the elastic band in your belly snaps. lando stops his thrusts, replacing them with small rolls of his hips to help you through your orgasm.
a sharp breath and a string of curses from him give you the strength to muster the last little bits of energy you have left to look up at him. you pull your head up off of his chest just in time to watch him shatter into a million little pieces.
his neck flexes as his head rolls back, sinking into the pillow, his eyes tight. swollen lips part and your name falls from between them like a prayer. you can feel him filling you up, his hands tightening their hold on your hips like heâs scared to let go, like the world will stop if he does.
the world stops anyway, because then youâre looking at each other. really looking at each other.
it only takes a second for you to be drawn in and his hands leave your hips to cup your face. his calloused hands feel your skin, stroking over rosy patches on your cheeks. itâs deathly silent all around you, apart from the breathless pants you share.
swollen lips crash hard into yours and you melt. heâs still buried so deeply inside of you, your hips digging into his, impossibly close. youâre blindly reaching for any part of him you can get your hands on, and his big hands slide down your body until they meet the small of your back. ever so carefully, he flips you onto your back, easing your spent body into the mattress.
lando collapses on top of you, mouthes at your neck for a moment, delicate kisses making your eyes flutter shut. the eye contact almost sends you into cardiac arrest as he pulls out, oh so slowly. tease.
he holds you close in the shower, fingers massaging every part of you. sex and sweat are washed away, almost lovingly. you let the water run for far too long, content in clinging to him. itâs quiet, reflective time for both of you, exactly what it needs to be. youâre both hung up on questions that need to be asked, neither one of you brave enough to take the first steps. you know one thing, and one thing only: something has changed, in a forever kind of way.
your hair is stringy, half dry, and youâre stood in your underwear. your legs are still shaky.
âyour flight soon?â lando asks. heâs stood in his boxers on the other side of the room, scrunching the water out of his curls.
âyeah.â your throat feels raw.
âand youâre going back to monaco?â heâs stopped what heâs doing now, staring at you. you can see the cogs turning behind his eyes.
you nod.
âfancy a sleepover?â he grins, boyish and careless. your heart falls to your feet.
youâre giggling when he sweeps you into his arms and kisses you into the freshly made bed. the sheets are on the floor by the time you finally remember you have a flight to catch.
youâre his now, you realise. heâs too beautiful for his own damn good.
-
âbaby?â you hear lando call from his bedroom. you make out the faint sound of his footsteps making their way in your direction. he appears before you can even answer him, and heâs smiling softly at the sight of you bundled up in a blanket, sprawled across his couch.
âwhat is it?â you ask. the next thing you know heâs on top of you, peppering kisses over every single inch of skin he can get to on your face. âhey, get off, muppet.â you whine playfully, ruffling his hair.
âdo you know how much i love having you here?â he murmurs. itâs endearing as fuck and you fight a foolish, dopey grin.
âyouâve mentioned once or twiceâŚâ youâve been here since your flight touched down a week ago. you havenât even been home to get clothes, not that you needed them in his company.
âwe might have a teeny, tiny issue.â he squints, pulling a face.
âand whatâs that?â you ask, your voice measuring equal parts cautious and amused.
âso, alex calledâŚâ
âoh, shit.â
âwe have to go to dinner tonight.â
âwe have to?â
âheâs suspicious as fuck. you do realise theyâve been plotting for us to happen for years,â you roll your eyes as if you say duh. âand also, youâve been in monaco for a week and havenât seen him once. oh, and also, the last time we saw them, we were running away from a fucking crime scene.â lando smiles sarcastically, and you sigh, defeated.
before you can reply, your phone is ringing somewhere beside you. you root around in your blanket searching for it and when you find it:
âson of a bitch.â you exclaim, showing lando the caller ID. alex is one persistent motherfucker.
âhey girl.â alex singsongs down the phone before you can even say hello.
âhello to you too.â you can hear the fear in your own voice.
âdinner. tonight. although, iâm sure lando already told you.â alex teases.
âwhy would lando have told me? what?â you choke. lando slaps his hand over his face. your voice has gone up several octaves. not suspicious at all.
âso, youâre at home? you havenât been at his place since last week?â the playful interrogation begins.
âwhy would i be with lando?â you try and feign disgust at the implication. it does not work.
âbecause you hate fucked after he beat up that perv? i have to say, i didnât think he had it in him but heâs been in love with you since he was like, ten, so, you know-â
âbye alex.ââ
âyouâre not denying it-â
âbye alex!â
youâre flaming red when you throw the phone to the other end of the sofa. lando, as on brand as ever, is cackling into a pillow.
âhe is such a fucking shit stirrer.â you bury your face in your hands, slumping back into the fuzzy cushions.
âwell, heâs right about one thing.â lando trails off. suddenly heâs looking anywhere but you and you see him gulp, hard, swallowing his words, like heâs too afraid to bare his soul.
âhuh?â you ask gently, sitting up to reach out for him. âwhatâs wrong?â
âwe need to get ready for dinner. thatâs what heâs right about.â lando says, standing from the sofa and walking towards his room. youâre suspicious, watching him go with furrowed eyebrows.
-
âlando, behave! youâre the one making me go to this dinner.â you squeal, batting his restless hands away.
youâve made it as far as the elevator before he pounces on you, caging you in against the metal walls.
âbut you look so good, canât help myself.â he mutters between kisses on your neck, pressing himself even further into you.
the hand that finds itâs way between your legs, exploring beyond the hem of your skirt, is the one that makes you press the button for his floor. why have plans when you can have sex?
he gets through the door to his apartment at lighting speed and carries you all the way to his bed.
when youâre sweating and breathless a good hour later, half of the bedding on the floor with your clothes, you realise you never cancelled your plans.
lando is drawing shapes into the bare skin of your arm, kissing over your shoulder as he does so. his eyes are dropping from all of the over-exertion and you want to count each and every freckle on his face while he falls asleep. heâs cute like this, soft and yours.
and idea comes to your mind, and as if he can see the lightbulb, lando half raises an eyebrow at you. you giggle, somewhat evilly perhaps, and scramble for your phone on the beside table.
âwhatâre you doing?â lando groans, pouting as his outstretched arms try to find you.
âgetting even.â you state.
with the phone in your clutches, you roll back over towards him, holding the camera above you both. he hears the shutter sound as you snap the picture, and peers closer to see the screen. when he sees the groupchat open, he quickly understands what youâre plotting.
âmay i?â you ask for his consent.
âare you kidding? go for it. thatâll shut them up.â he laughs sleepily, muttering something about how this is the most lando thing youâve ever done
FROM: you
TO: the groupchat
1 image attached
couldnât make dinner. something came up xx
âalex always thinks heâs right, thisâll teach him for being such a little shit.â you flop back into bed even more satisfied than you were before.
you hear lando inhale shakily beside you.
âhe is right sometimes you know.â he repeats his earlier words.
you hold your breath. his eyes say so many things that are too delicate to be spoken yet.
âlike⌠like what he said on the phone?â your voice quivers with anticipation, fear. your heart is thunderous, hammering away like it wants to escape the clutches of its cage.
âyeah. i-â he stops himself. you donât need him to finish, you know which two words follow. they can follow in good time, you both know it.
âme too, lando.â you coo.
heâs beaming, eyes half shut. you watch as he falls asleep, the both of you ignoring the way your phones are vibrating so aggressively that they might buzz their way off of the night stand. you lose count of his freckles, but it doesnât matter.
youâll have plenty of time to figure it out.
-
let me know what you think :D
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May I?
Just Logan
The worst Logan part ii
Logan Howlett x Reader!Loganverse| smut | 10k words
Summary: You return from the void ready to navigate your new reality with the not-quite-love-of-your life. Second Part to worst Logan.
Warning: Mentions of drugs, Canon Typical Violence, gratuitous Laura paternal love. smut, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, assplay mentioned.
AN: Fair warning my loves - this hasnât been proof read⌠unless youâre reading this after the 26th August! Iâm currently posting this on my phone at an airport đ I love you all so much and canât express how much your love for my stories has meant to me!
Achilles once said âI would recognize you in total darkness, were you mute and I deaf. I would recognize you in another lifetime entirely, in different bodies, different times. and I would love you in all of this, until the very last star in the sky burnt out into oblivion."
For seven excruciating years youâd been without him.Â
Eventually, time had dulled the ache, made it so you forgot what it was to have another hold you through the night, to make you feel safe and loved. Love was like a drug; one you had unknowingly spent the past half a decade weaning yourself from.
Then he appeared; âThe worst Loganâ as Wade had not-so-affectionately dubbed him, and in one fell swoop undid years of hard work. He came and reminded you just how fucking good drugs were - that motherfucker was class-A narcotics and he was addictive as hell.
By mid morning you were already desperate for another hit, your eyes searching for him around every corner. Part of you was afraid you had gotten him all wrong, that perhaps you didnât know this man as well as you thought you did. Though at the last second Logan had shown up, unfolding him from the boot of the Honda and joining the fray, every inch the hero he insisted he wasnât.Â
You and Laura sliced a path through your enemies, side by side, the two of you moved in perfect synchronisation. In the years since his death, she had taken Loganâs position in your formation, and now the two of you fought together as naturally as breathing.Â
Logan couldnât help but watch the two of you together for a moment, though after a knife to the ribs as reward for his lack of awareness, he shakes his head free from the indulgence of his ready-made-family and returns to the task at hand, carving his way through the enemy to get to Cassandra.Â
 It had been a hard-won battle, though Laura had been extraordinary. You, yourself had been outmatched with the Juggernaut, only in a position to bend the light keeping yourself from sight as you inflicted shallow cuts with your blades along his arms and torso creating confusion and pain that allowed Laura to find her openings.
Your girl sliced through his Achilles bringing him to his knees before she ended his life with four claws through his chest.Â
In your eyes, as she stared down Goliath her soft features melted into a renaissance painting. A woman in her own right, overflowing with untold power, those shades making her look every inch the badass motherfucker you knew she was.
You canât help your untimely realisation that your daughter has grown into a formidable woman as you propel her through the air with bubbles of psionic energy to deliver the helmet to her not-quite-father and Wade.  Â
The brief moment of triumph as you overcome Cassandraâs men is followed in quick succession by the sobering loss of Logan for a second time, as he leaps through the golden shimmering portal.
It had been the plan all along, and yet you couldnât quite account for the stone in your stomach weighing you down at the realisation he is gone yet again.
Lauraâs deep brown eyes, all too often full of difficult emotions, are hidden behind the colourful sunglasses, though you can tell from the fall in her shoulders that your girl feels the same grief. She had held out childlike hope that the two of you would stay with him despite his earlier brush off and you are far too ashamed to admit you had been harbouring similar hopes.
To have gotten him back for a single day only to lose him again, for you it is painful. For her, it must be torment.
So, you put a pin in your pain for now. Loss is an old friend, one that will no doubt visit in the dead of night when sleep inevitably evades you, but Laura needs you.
Swallowing your grief deep down, you begin by tucking her wild dark hair back behind her ears and with the bone of your knuckle you wipe an errant splatter of blood from her brow.
Around you, your team bask in the defeat of Cassandra and her people, yet the two of you mourn losing yet another Logan.
âThe time we had with him was a gift.â You whisper to her. The second you touch her palm with your finger tips; her claws instantaneously retract. You interlock your fingers with her own bloodied ones.Â
For a moment the two of you stand together like this, coming to terms with the loss. It doesnât destroy you the same way North Dakota had, but it has certainly taken the air from your lungs.Â
âWhat now?â Laura asks, burying her emotions, more like Logan than you care to admit. Â
âNow we find a way to get back home, Cassandraâs not hunting us anymore, maybe we can-â
âMiss Y/LN, Miss- âAt the sound of an unfamiliar voice your head whips round and you are armed with a knife before you even make the decision and from the telltale âsniktâ behind you so is Laura.
 âHolster your weapons.â The agent shouts as the group of forgotten heroes turn their gaze on the TVA squad who have appeared from the orange glowing doorway. âYou have been offered a pardon on order of the time variance authority - please come with us.â
 Laura steps forward, though you place a steady hand on her shoulder stopping her in her tracks. âThe last time we trusted you people, we ended up in this dump.â You shout across the gulf that the agents have left between you.Â
When has anything in life been this easy?
 âMr Howlett and Mr Wilson saved the multiverse. All they have asked in return is for a second chance for the people who helped them do it.â
Whilst remaining utterly compelling it still feels far too good to be true. You look at your daughter; she pushes her sunglasses to the top of her head and nods once. Sheâs not a little girl anymore and she wants to go through the damn doorway. With little in the way of options you decide with a deep sigh to be an optimist, which is how you end up in Wade Wilsonâs apartment.
Five people (six if you include Dogpool) living in a two-bedroom apartment was âŚÂ to put it lightly, snug. Wade being the secret gentleman he was, offered up his room to you and Laura.
Nights he didnât spend at Vanessaâs were spent sharing a bed with Al, much to her delight, which left Logan sleeping on the couch.
Logan: This Logan was nothing short of an enigma to you.Â
The two of you had been friendly, smiling and laughing, sitting together at the party Wade had thrown to celebrate saving the universe.
It felt good, easy even to joke with him and Laura. You had felt like a real family as you sandwiched the young girl between the two of you, taking it in turns to make her laugh.
When she had abandoned the two of you to talk with Yukio and Ellie, you had fallen into comfortable companionable silence. The simple fact of the matter was that you didnât have much in the way of small talk, all of your talk was massive talk. A mountain youâd soon have to overcome, but neither of you wanted to break the spell.
So, you simply enjoyed each otherâs company and when your knee knocked against his under the table, you didnât bother pulling back. Instead, when he didnât immediately recoil, you left it there pressed against the warm muscle.Â
This casual touching was new to both of you and you were drunk on it, occasionally youâd brush his plaid covered bicep as you leaned across to stroke the monstrosity that was Mary Poppins or youâd brush your fingers against his with a smile when you handed him a fresh beer. Â
Itâs fair to say, you are both black belts at emotional avoidance.Â
Her abandoned airbed, more electrical tape than plastic at this point, lies deflated in the corner of the bedroom, dual holes from slender claws having led to its untimely end.
With a sigh you rise, stretching your aching back.Â
Wincing as it cracks from contorting on the edge of the double mattress- even in the goddamned void, youâd had more personal space than this.
Sparing a glance at the alarm clock on the bedside table, you see itâs 6:23am. In a vain hope you just listen to the sounds of the quiet apartment, no one else has awoken yet. You sigh with relief, desperate for some alone time, after living for a week with everyone underfoot.Â
Closing the bedroom door behind you as silently as possible, you tiptoe with bare feet with the honest intention of going to the kitchen for some coffee.
Only youâre sidetracked by the man sprawled across the sofa looking like he was carved from goddamn marble.
The blanket is wrapped around his plentiful jean covered thighs as his bare size twelves extend comically over the arm of the sofa. Loganâs thick, veined and extremely bare arm hangs off of the leather cushion, whilst the other clutches a pillow under his head. Logan is wearing a white vest that leaves very little to the imagination, so much so youâre unable to help the flashback of stroking the abs you know linger below the almost transparent white cotton. Youâre unsure how long you stand there, but it canât be more than 30-seconds before his eyes wearily blink open, startling you.
âPaint a picture, itâll last longer, Bub.â When he speaks, his voice is even thicker than usual with sleep, itâs like honey on gravel and it makes your skin tingle.
âUh-â Youâre lost for words after being caught ogling the sleeping man. All you can do is a quick apology as you carry on through to the kitchen.
When youâre safe from view, you slap palm to your forehead - Why? Why couldnât you for once in your life just be smooth?Â
The second you're out from under his searing gaze a million infinitely suaver responses flood your mind. âDonât mind if I do.â âDonât tempt me.âÂ
Youâre nearly (Y/A+7 years) old, not the idiot girl that pined after the unattainable bad boy of the mansion. For the love of all thatâs holy; two different versions of that man have been inside of you, and you ran away!
Youâre pacing in front of the fridge when you hear his body slide against the leather of the couch. Honestly, youâre praying for the void to swallow you back up as you try to act casual, filling the coffee machine with water.
 âMorninâ.â
âGood Morning, Logan.â You reply though you canât quite meet his eyes as you flick the switch for the drip to begin.Â
âBack on the couch - Eh, I was just kiddinâ around, Bub.â He scratches his neck awkwardly.
âOh. I, uh, I know.â You reply, finally meeting his eyes. Those hazel eyes stop you in your tracks as they scan your face for any trace of emotion. Heâs as out of his depth as you are, and that thought alone calms you. âIâm sorry, If iâve been strange the past few days⌠I thoughtâŚI just assumed I would never make it out of the void and I was there for months and uh-â
âBub⌠y/n... I donât hold you to what happened that night.â
âWhat?â You narrow your brows in confusion, you were only going to talk about the uncomfortable adjustment period to regular life. Â
âYou were vulnerable, I look like your guy. I get it.â His voice is still deep and heâs trying to be so understanding and noble, you canât help as you reach out and grab his bare wrist, your forefinger can't even meet your thumb as you hold onto his thick warm flesh.
âLogan, no thatâs not what I meant at all. I-âÂ
â-Morninâ love birds! Donât let me stop yaâ from takinâ care of that morninâ wood, just getting some delicious nectar of the gods.â Wade comes from the bedroom wearing Alâs lilac dressing gown and what looks suspiciously like the older womanâs pyjamas, riding far too high up his shins to be his own for the much taller man. Wade leans against the counter next to you and the coffee machine, burying himself in the neck of the dressing gown and looking pointedly at your hand around Loganâs wrist and whispers. âPretend Iâm not even here.â
âGod give me strength, Wade.â Somewhere along the way, Loganâs rage with the mouth has dampened to the point thereâs no real threat behind the warning.
As thereâs probably about a few teaspoons of coffee in the machine, every fresh drop plinks against the glass jug only enhancing the newfound silence in the kitchen.
âGood Morning, Wade.â You sigh finally, rubbing your thumb against the hair covered flesh of Loganâs wrist in a promise as you try to use your eyes to communicate; we will discuss this.Â
âHonestly, Iâm not even here. Just go back to staring longingly at each other, talk amongst yourselves.â
âFu-â Logan starts, his nose flaring at the man beside you, his finite patience already slipping. Â
âIncoming.â Wade sings-song lowly, as he drops his head onto your shoulder.
âWhat are we all doing in the kitchen?â Laura asks through a yawn, her bed head innately ridiculous standing up on all sides - probably from a night spent tossing and turning, kneeing you in the spine. When Logan tears his wrist away from your hand it stings a little, but you understand, the last thing Laura needs in her life is more confusion.
âThereâs a line for the coffee, kiddo.â Logan gives her a look that's somewhere between a smile and a grimace. The manâs sharp edges were slowly being worn away again and he was really trying with his daughter, though a tiny growl leaves the young woman at his words.
âSheâs not a morning person.â Is the only answer you have for him when he looks your way both confused and quite frankly a little frightened as your daughter takes the first cup of coffee and returns to her room slamming the door behind her with her foot. Â
âTeenagers, huh? Whatchaâ gonnaâ do with them?â Wade sighs, still leaning his head on your shoulder having made no effort to stop the queue jumper.
Logan gives Wade a meaningful look and tilts his head towards the door, which the man currently invading your personal space bubble continues to ignore.Â
Thereâs something about Wade you canât find it in yourself to be annoyed by.Â
Those years on the run with Charles, Logan and Caliban had been so hopeless, so void of laughter, that the man with the constant jokes puts you at ease, makes your heart feel lighter. Wade makes you smile which has been a rare commodity in recent years.
Perhaps it's the fact he makes the world feel a little lighter that makes you so willing to tolerate the overly familiar head on your shoulder.Â
The two men are having a silent conversation, as you stare at the fridge awkwardly.
âIâŚuh⌠I think Iâll jump in the shower.â You detangle yourself from Wade and place a meaningful hand on Logan's arm. âTalk later?â
He looks to your hand, and then to your face and simply nods.Â
Only, you donât end up talking later, because after your shower, you return to your bedroom hell bent on getting dressed and heading out into the city for the day to get some distance before you start your new job tomorrow.
Thatâs when you find Laura twisting her hands and waiting for you. The second you close the door behind you, she stands.
âYou alright, bug?â You ask, giving her the opening she so desperately needs.Â
âI, um, have some news.â She can barely meet your eyes, a trait youâre sorry to say sheâs picked up from you.Â
âYeah?â You prompt, taking her hand in yours.
âI want to join the X-Men.â Your mouth opens involuntarily to reply, but no words can find their way up your throat; youâre irrevocably thrown.Â
In the years since the devastation Charles had wrought on the manor, you hadnât been able to muster the strength to return to West Chester.
âI know, you might not be sold on the idea but I want to use my powers for good, I donât want to get a normal job - not that the coffee shop isnât great for you - but Iâm-â
âItâs great, Laura.â Your voice sounds wrong even to your ears. âIâll do my best to get used to being back in the Mansion-â
âNo.â You can tell it slips out, she honestly doesnât mean it to. âI ⌠I, uh, want to join the X-Men, me. I want to go alone.â
âOh.â You canât help the deflated sound of your voice, you hadnât foreseen your daughter breaking up with you when you woke up this morning.
âNo, mamĂĄ,â She takes your hand in hers, desperate to fix it. âI love you and I canât ever repay-â
âNo, Laura.â You tell her. She looks terrified before you rush to finish. âYou donât ever have to repay me. You are fucking magnificent, so you go be an X-Man. I love you so much.âÂ
She wraps her arms around your middle, buries her face in your shoulder and squeezes, she's just as tall as you are now at nineteen years old and fuck if it doesnât break your goddamn heart.. âIf you get yourself hurt with those do gooders, Iâll fucking kill you.â
After dressing and many more tearful hugs as the two of you talk logistics, it's decided sheâd be heading over to the mansion in the morning.Â
You start work and so does she.
Your heart drops when you hear sheâs put off telling you for the past five days, ever since sheâd had the offer from Ellie and Yukio at the party.Â
Later that evening telling Logan goes, well, about as well as you might expect.
âNo.â He growls furiously. âAbsolutely, no fuckinâ way.â
âLogan-â You try.
âYou agreed to this?â Heâs blind to reason as he turns on you. Al and Wade both sit in the living room, having called an âurgent family meetingâ.Â
âI for one think it's a great idea! - not that we havenât loved having-â One look from Logan does what you had up until this very moment thought impossible and shuts Wade up.Â
âLogan, sheâs an adult - she wants to join them. We should be supportive.â
âSupportive?!â Heâs incredulous as he laughs harshly, voice utterly brimming with condescension when he continues. âYou forgettinâ what happened there, huh, bub? You and I are the fuckinâ sole survivors - Last of the class! How's your Storm doing? Your Hank? Your Scott? Oh wait, their all fuckinâ dead!â
Your Logan never spoke to you this way. Never directed that fire within him at you, it's unfair, the comparison, you know this but your brain is misfiring with shock.Â
Had your Logan ever truly cared about anything this much when youâd been together in those dark days? Had all the fight truly left him back then? Had the two of you just ended up together out of mere convenience?
When you donât reply, he just stares your way, his nose flared still utterly furious, at you, your betrayal, at Laura, at this situation heâs not emotionally equipped to deal with. This Loganâs shoulders are squared like heâs preparing to go a few rounds with you and not in a sexy way.Â
It's not a situation youâre entirely sure youâve been in before; youâve never been his enemy. So youâre not sure how to approach this cornered animal, ready to swipe out at you in his fear.Â
âIf I didnât go to that school, I never wouldâve met any of you. I would be back in Y/H/T (your hometown) and Iâd be lesser for it.âÂ
It utterly disarms him, heâd clearly been prepared for harsh words to combat his own.
Pacing like a tiger locked in a cage, he finally sighs rubbing his forehead irritability. Logan turns, grabbing his leather jacket making the doorframe shake as he slams it after himself.Â
âI think heâs secretly happy for you, Laura.â Wadeâs voice is light and full of sarcasm.
âThat went just about as well as to be expected.â Al huffs from her position at her side as she takes Lauraâs hand in her own. âIâm sorry, Sweetie. Heâll come round to the idea.â
âYes, he fucking will.â Seeing your daughter's face crumble as he storms off like a child is apparently your breaking point.
You follow after him, though as youâre a grown adult in charge of her emotions you simply allow the door to close behind you.
âHaha! - Sheâs gonna beat the shit outtaâ him! Its gonnaâ be like 454 when she-â You hear Wade cackle as you take off.
It doesnât take long to find him, you know the man better than you know yourself, though it does certainly help that heâs predictable as shit.
The closest bar to the apartment is where heâs pulled up a stool, his nose flares the second he smells you.
âI mean it this time, Iâm not looking for damn company.â
You ignore him, just as you did the time before.Â
âTwo Coronaâs please.â
âI donât drink that shit.â he huffs. âCorona and a Blue Ribbon.â
It shouldnât hit you the way it does.Â
Just like before, this miniscule insignificant difference, it utterly devastates you. Â
A simple fact; his favourite beer. The drink he ordered at every bar he entered without fail - is suddenly, without warning, repulsive to him.Â
It just serves to remind you that the man slouched on the bar stool beside you is a complete stranger wearing the face of your dead lover.
Perhaps your Logan drank it simply because he didnât want to hurt your feelings?Â
Had he hated it all along?Â
Did he only drink it because you did?Â
Maybe the beer is a pertinent metaphor for your entire life.
He only drank the beer because it was there, just like he only fell for you because there was no one better around.Â
Your mind is moving a mile a minute, youâre only bought out of your spiral by a bottle being placed down in front of you.
Shaking your head, you will yourself to calm down. After a few centering breaths, Logan is looking your way.Â
âThought you were cominâ to give me a talkinâ to.â
It's funny, in a way, your spiral actually has calmed you, reminded you that this isnât your Logan.Â
Heâs a different man with his own set of wounds, trying to navigate this awful situation just like you are.Â
âI was going to. You were a dick to her back there.â You sigh, taking a sip of your beer. âThen I remembered everything⌠everything youâve lost and I thought maybe I could just cut you some slack this time.â
âThat's generous.â He shakes his head, sipping his own beer. âThis whole things a fuckinâ mess.â
You canât help but agree with a nod.Â
The two of you sit in silence, which would appear to be the norm these days, you have so much to say to one another, yet you canât seem to find the words.Â
Speaking to him, finding out more of the things that are different about him, terrifies you.
Little do you know, Logan is fighting a similar battle.
He hates the weight of your gaze, how it seems to hold the expectation of the great man youâd lost with every glance, it's a constant reminder how short he falls of the anchor being this world lost.Â
âWhere am I in your world?â You ask the question youâve had on your mind since meeting him. He knows almost everything about you, and yet you know so little.
âDead.â He sighs rubbing at his eyes. âWith the rest of them.â
âDid we ever?â He looks your way sharply at this question, then gives a harsh shake of his head.Â
It hurts a little to know you were always in the background for him - it's difficult to think of a world where you always loved him from afar, never getting to feel his skin on yours.Â
âI mean - youâd have had to pay attention to someone other than her for that to happen, I guess.â
âHow the fuckâ-â He growls voice filled with a new emotion, one youâre not quite familiar with. Bemusement? Disbelief? â-has this turned into me being the bad guy for not noticing you?âÂ
âEh - you were a real asshole upstairs.â Smirking, you take another sip of your drink. âQuestion for a question? - Take it in turns?â
âI donât wannaâ know anythinâ about your world.â He snaps, turning his head back, though you can see him watching you in the mirror beside the booze.Â
It's like a countdown, you watch him battle his volatile emotions.Â
5, 4, 3 , 2, 1.
âFine.â He grunts into his beer bottle. âHowâd they die?â
That throws you, youâd expected howâd we meet? What happened to Charles? Instead he hits you with that straight out the gate.
âUh - Charles had started showing signs of a degenerative brain disease. I mean, he was old, prone to seizures. We were desperate to find a way to control them. We were blind⌠to the reality of the situation.â You take a sip, resting your forehead on your hand as your eyes ache and threaten to water, this was the first time youâd ever discussed this out loud.. âThen, he had a fucking grand mal ⌠it ⌠it wiped out everyone within a 100,000 foot radius.âÂ
Unable to help it, you pick at the skin around your thumb. âIt was⌠devastating. He killed them all. All the kids in their classrooms, our friends and family. Not even Jean could stop him.â
âHe⌠he killed Jean?â
You're a little ashamed of the flare of jealousy at his devastation about the woman youâd always come second to. But you push that deep down, it's not the time nor place.
âHowâd you survive?â He questions.Â
âI was away. Iâd heard of a neurosurgeon in Germany, he was developing⌠Well, it doesnât matter now. But I was away, whilst everyone I cared about died.âÂ
Youâd never had a need to speak of it, Logan had lived it alongside you - there was something cathartic about saying it all out loud. You wipe at your cheek as you gulp down the last of your drink, a heavy stone weighing your stomach now.Â
âYour turn.â Loganâs voice is deep in thought as gestures to the bartender for another. Heâs extending an olive branch, a kindness in the face of your vulnerability.Â
You think about it for a moment, what youâd like to know.Â
âWe were friends at least?â
âOh yeah, we were the best of friends, Bub. You were⌠uh ⌠a lilâ younger back there, never really looked at you that way.â He scratches at his bearded chin, heâs avoiding looking your way again, uncomfortable sharing these parts of himself. âYou⌠uh⌠you were gonna have pups with Pete.â
âWith Maximoff?!â You squeak disbelieving, whilst taking a sip of your beer prompting a coughing fit to end them all, as you gasp for air.Â
Logan sighs, slamming his open palm between your shoulder blades. He rubs the spot he just hit in a circle pattern, reminding you somewhat of the last time he drew circles.
âI had a baby with Peter?â You push your hair back from your face. â...That's why he used to stare at me ⌠yâknow there was one timeâŚâÂ
You smile fondly recounting a time you caught him staring creepily across your classroom before you remember that sweet silver haired kid in your memories is dead. The smile drops from your face in an instant; you didnât have children with him because heâs six feet under.Â
âNo. You were pregnant whenâŚ.â He grunts, his voice has a raw edge to it. For two people constantly at odds, your souls were in the same state of flux, continually aching for vastly different reasons, yet at the root, the same cause.Â
The two of you sit in silence for a moment or two, youâre processing the fact that you almost had kids with Quicksilver and heâs no doubt regretting ever playing this game.
The game.Â
âIt's your turn.â
âThis is why she shouldnât join them, everyone we know is dead.â Logan has had enough of the game as he sighs, rubbing at his eyes. âBeing a goddamn hero gets you killed.â
âLogan.â You touch the back of the hand currently gripping the beer bottle neck like it owes him money. âSheâs strong, stronger than me. Laura is you in every way that counts. Sheâs ridiculously stubborn, headstrong - even when sheâs wrong - and she has a kind heart. She wants to use those gifts youâve given her for good. How can you stand in the way of that?âÂ
Loganâs hand flips over, his warm callused fingers coming to link around your own.Â
âThe kind heart is all you, bub.âÂ
The beers have loosened your tongue, made your anxieties seem a little further away.
âI donât know. You have your moments.â His fingers dance along your palm, stroking the broken planes.
The two of you enjoy this easy intimacy youâd been forming over the past few days.Â
âHowâd we get together?â Those instruments of death youâve seen take countless lives, glide over the soft skin of your wrist. Your eyes, usually so afraid to meet his, canât leave their hazel captivity as you process his blunt question
âOh, uhâŚâ Tucking your hair behind your ear with your free hand, your eyes dart to his fingers still drifting across your flesh.
âDonât get shy on me now, bub.â He smirks, though his heartâs not in it.Â
That asshole.Â
Taking a deep gulp of your third beer, you rely on the liquid courage, before raising your eyes back to his.
âOne night. It was a few days after everything, we had finally got a sedative for Charles. We had a moment to take stock of everything weâd lost. You ⌠uh ⌠he came to me and ⌠he cried. The first time Iâd seen it.â His hand pulls back, but you canât help it, you refuse to release your hold. You donât want to lose this connection. Your thumb dips, rubbing at his knuckle, at the joint where his claws always caused the bone to ache. âI held him and he kissed me, it was messy. It was desperate but I think we both needed to feel something that wasnât grief.âÂ
âAnd I thought I was special⌠â His voice holds sarcasm though you can tell the sentiment behind it is anything but humorous.
âYou are special to me.â
âYeah.â His voice is dismissive, like he doesnât believe what youâre saying.
âYou are.â
âI look like the guy whoâs special to you, darlinâ. Iâm not him, as much as you may wish I am. Hell I wish I was.â He has snatched his hand away as he slams cash down on the bar.
Logan has started the short walk back to the apartment, cutting through the alley.
Heâs hurt, burying it deep beneath the rage. His anger is an old friend. One heâs comfortable confronting.
âIâm done with your stupid games. Iâm done with it all. Havenât you got the memo? Iâm the worst Logan.â
âIâm so fucking sick of that! Youâre so goddamn cruel to yourself.â You cry out at his leather covered shoulders, that in itself seems to stop him in his tracks. The Y/N from his world was a mousy wallflower through and through, nothing heâd seen from this world led him to believe you were any different and yet his ears werenât deceiving him. âI loved my Logan - I fucking adored him. Yes, sometimes it's hard to separate the two of you, but I care for you.â
He stands motionless in the alley as you bare your soul.Â
âIâve known you for a week. I canât love you the same because youâre not the same person, not entirely, but my soul knows yours. Youâre Logan.â Youâve closed the distance but he still wont turn around and perhaps that's what makes it easier to say the things youâve been desperate to say for days. âI look in your eyes and I feel safe, when you touch me everything feels like it's going to be okay. Youâre not the worst, youâre not the best. Youâre Logan; youâre just Logan.â
Logan is on you instantly, silencing your words with a scorching kiss. It's the kind you see in movies, desperate, filled to the brim with passion, usually taking place in the rain.
His hands find your lower back, pulling you to him as your wrap your arms around his neck, making sure he canât escape from your grasp, as he growls and pushes you against the brick wall.Â
Your nose aches from the pressure of his cheek pressed against it as he devours your mouth with his own. He is claiming your mouth with a week of pent up emotions. He grips your thigh, hiking your leg up around his waist, pressing the hardened bulge of his jeans against your core.Â
âMom? ⌠Logan?âÂ
There in the street light Laura is illuminated. Her face gives nothing away, she may as well be wearing those sunglasses for all you can garner from her expression.Â
âHey Love! - I.. WeâŚuh-â Logan slowly releases your thigh, slyly adjusting his jeans in an attempt to hide his erection. You do your best to stand in front of the -ahem- sizeable bulge.Â
âHow's it going?â You ask with a faux air of casualness as you place your hands on your hips, though your voice has a weird edge.
âPretty good. Howâs it going for you?â Her own voice has a coy little smile to it, which puts you at ease just a little.Â
âGreat, Iâm great. Logan? You great?â
âGreat.â He grunts behind you.Â
âGreat! - Everyoneâs ⌠great.âÂ
The three of you stand in silence for a second or two, processing what's just happened or perhaps trying to decide if great is still a real word.
âYouâre so weird.â Laura snorts. âFor the record Iâm happy that you both pulled your heads out of your asses.â
âBaby-â
âKid-â You and Logan speak in sync. Your eyes lock as you both try and decide how the other was going to finish that sentence.
âLaura - me and your Mom⌠uh⌠things are complicated⌠and we donât want to drag you into this.â Logan, the man of very few words, has managed to find them. Youâre stunned into silence as he takes control of a conversation⌠about feelings⌠with his daughter.
This is not any Logan that you know.
Laura looks to you, waiting for your seal of approval on the message. Â
âI know how confusing things are already, Bug.â You close the distance between the two of you, linking your fingers with hers. âMe and your dad, weâre working through some things.â
You notice Loganâs shoulders setting straighter at his new title, like a welcome weight has been placed upon them. She nods at your words, smiling devilishly.
âIt was just a matter of time, Mama. He has a staring problem.â
âNo, I fuckinâ donât.â He growls from behind you both. Your heart feels lighter than it has in a decade as the two of you cackle at his defensive response.
He digs his hands into his pockets glaring your way, though it has no heat whatsoever behind it, in fact he looks like heâs fighting a smile.
With your hand still firmly in Lauraâs you pull her back towards the apartment, linking your arm through Loganâs warm, thick leather clad one. He doesnât take your hand, but he also doesnât pull away as the three of you walk back to the house.Â
âCan we get pizza? - For emotional trauma?â She questions.
âBaby, Iâll buy you all the pizza in New York.â You reply rolling your eyes.
âNot with fuckinâ pineapple on.â Logan groans.
âPineapple on pizza is objectively delicious!â Laura defends from her place on your otherside, she pulls on your hand still hanging between the two of you. âBack me up.â
âI will always have your back ⌠butâŚ. pineapple on pizza is in fact a crime against humanity.âÂ
Logan lets out a guffaw of victory, as Laura snarls his way. You take a mental picture, the warmth in your chest, bracketed in by your two favourite people in the world. Life is good.
Laura leaves the next morning.Â
It is a difficult pill to swallow, after seven years by her side. You canât quite make the leap to take her to the mansion, it's something she understands. So when you embrace her at the doorway after Ellie reassures you for the 30th time sheâll look out for her, you find it hard to let go.
There hasnât been a day youâve been without her since you first met the scrawny 12-year old in Mexico. Laura is an extension of you, like your heart is on the outside of your body and youâre not ready for your heart to go to West Chester without you being there to protect it.Â
At that moment you understand why she needs this independence, sheâs 19 years old. She needs her own life, to experience everything it has to offer but that doesnât make letting go any easier.
âYou call if you need anything, anything at all.â You tell her as you push her hair behind her ears. âDonât stay up too late but also donât go to bed too early to make friends but make sure you get plenty of sleep.â
âI will get the perfect amount of sleep, donât worry.â She grabs your wrists, removing your hands from her hair.
âOkay, okay. Sorry.â You sigh, your anxiety is eating away at your stomach. Sheâs not the vulnerable child being hunted anymore, you try to remind yourself. âIf you need me-â
â-If you need us. Weâll be there.â Logan cuts you off, interjecting his own amendment.Â
In a show of affection youâre not quite expecting, he hugs the girl. It's somewhat awkward and clumsy, the two have known each other for a week, but when they pull back, you can see the gesture was all that really mattered.
He hands her her backpack, which she throws one strap over her shoulder. The two smile at each other in their silent language, both such quiet souls.Â
When she turns back to you, you ask. âWe can walk you down?â
âStay here? Itâs easier this way.â She looks so small as she pleads with you.
Taking mercy on her, you nod.Â
âOkay.â Waving you watch her turn for the door. You donât expect however when she turns back and barrels into your chest for a final time, burying her face in your neck.
âI love you, Mama.â She whispers, you canât help it as your eyes water. You wrap your arms around her, squeezing her tightly to your chest.Â
âI love you. You are my world.â You know she needs you to let her go for her to be able to walk through that door. So with a deep inhale of her hair for the road, you pull back gathering your strength. You pull her other strap onto her shoulder and push her hair back from her face. You wipe her tears from her cheeks and give her the biggest smile you can muster, despite your teary eyes and broken voice. âGive them hell, baby.â
Laura nods, giving her own matching teary smile. Her back straightens and her shoulders square as she follows Yukio and Ellie down the hall. The duo waving at you as they descend down the stairs.
Youâre so busy watching your world disappear down the hall you barely feel the heavy warm hand wrap around your shoulder in comfort. You melt into Loganâs side as your heart shatters.
You wait for him to leave in a hurry, only he does the last thing you expect of the Wolverine. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you to his chest. You close your eyes as the tears begin to fall against your will.Â
Logan strokes your back. He doesnât offer any words of comfort, but he doesnât need to, his presence alone is enough.
His trimmed beard, bristles against your hair as he places a kiss on the top of your head, burying his nose in your hair as he holds you.Â
It's hard to say how long the two of you stand there like that. Only when your body stops shaking do you finally look up through tear streamed eyes. Logan looks down at you, his face is lined with concern.Â
âYou good?â
âI will be.â Your voice is broken from crying. âI-â
âI know, Bub.â He smiles your way, one youâve not seen, perhaps ever.
It's soft, sympathetic but filled with adoration. He pushes the strand of hair, now sodden with tears, back behind your ear. His finger lingers on the curve of the bone for a moment or two before he pulls back.Â
âBar?â
âBar.â
Things change when Laura leaves. Not massively, and not entirely for the worst.
You and Logan had started sharing the bed, not like that (unfortunately), but sleeping next to one another. It was comfier than the sofa and his body curled around yours made you sleep a hell of a lot more soundly. Suddenly years of insomnia were cured by his muscled warmth curled around you like a safety blanket.
He never made a move to further it, even if you had once or twice tried to entice him by grinding your backside against his morning wood. The man was nothing if not resilient as he rolled away, grunting.
The two of you had been getting to know one another, you had resolved to treat him like a whole new man. This revelation meant that their differences werenât such a blow anymore, you didnât actively compare the two of them as much.
You had created a clear picket line in your head and it seemed to be working. They were two different versions of the same man, each with their own merits and disadvantages.Â
They werenât to be compared.
The two of you had started a ritual of movie nights, evenings where youâd sit a little too close on the couch and pretend it wasnât happening. Heâd share a blanket he knew he didnât need just to get close to you. It was a little uncomfortable when Wade asked to come under the blanket but you enjoyed the time spent with the clown, Â
In fact, your favourite night had been when you, Wade and Al had all sat down to watch the Notebook - the movie Logan point blank refused watch.
Yes, the movie he objected to so strongly, then proceeded to watch from behind the couch, standing awkwardly on the threshold of the lounge. Where he lingered for the first half an hour pretending to have no interest in it.Â
When the end credits came around he was back under the blanket with you and Wade, utterly refusing to admit that heâd cried.Â
That argument with Wade had gotten heated and heâd put three little tears in your blanket, but it was one of your fondest memories in this apartment.Â
It had been three weeks now. Only two of them had been spent hunting for a room that you could afford on a baristaâs salary, which was the only job you were qualified for after dropping off the planet for the past ten years.
Colossus had offered you your old teaching position though you didnât want to cramp Lauraâs style and you didnât think you could face stepping foot back in that mansion, too many of your ghosts lingered there. The same could be said for Logan, though he had found much better paying work at St Margarets.
He and Wade did odd jobs, merc work to pay the rent. They killed bad guys and got paid for it, and boy they got paid a hell of a lot more than you.
The coffee shop below Wadeâs apartment, or waking hell, as youâd come to know it was your slice of a regular life; trying to push your circle peg into a triangle hole.
Its a 24-hour coffee shop, cause who doesnât need caffeine at 3am? Tch. New York. Youâre leaning on the counter a million miles away, contemplating if the graveyard shifts are worth the illusion of paying your way when Logan makes up most of your share of the rent anyway.
Your singular customer is a young guy typing away on his laptop, desperately trying to finish what looks like a college essay. Heâs eleven espressos in and has been here since before your shift started at 5pm. You havenât been told if you can cut someone off, but surely that much caffeine must count as overserving.Â
The bell above the door tingles loudly, the warm lights illuminate his red mask.Â
Wade.
âHey angel baby!â He comes to the counter, pretending to read the board as if he hasnât been here a million times before.
âHi Wade.â You smile tiredly at the man. âWhatâcha want? It's on the house!â
âOoooh, gimmeâ a Caramel Macchiato but hit me with like 6 shots espresso, extra caramel and donât skimp on the whipped cream - I like to call this the don't stop til dawn.â
âYour insides must be a mess.â You shake your head and get to making his drink.Â
âHowâs the soul crushing service industry treating ya?â He asks, leaning one hand on the counter.
âItâs okay. A little boring, but not so bad, nobody's shooting at me.â You motion downwards with your eyes to the fresh bullet holes in his red suit.
âHa! Yeahhh. But it's good old fashioned fun, beating guys to a pulp, saving kids from trees, taking candy from cats.â You roll your eyes at the man. âBut they say, if you love your job you never work a day in your life! And boy, I love my job.â
You're steaming the milk when he speaks up again, shouting loudly over the machine. âYou should come and work with me and Logi Bear. Heâs 10% less of an old grumpy fuck when youâre around.â
Heâs still shouting when the machine quietens, making your cringe a little as the kid looks your way. This isnât the first time Wadeâs broached the subject with you.
âI get you wanna move out, we love having you, but I get that Alâs old lady smell can get sortaâ overwhelming after a while.â
âWade.â You sigh, admonishing his jokes about the lady who youâve grown to care for in the past month. âIf you didnât live in a two bed, Iâd love to stay, but it's just too small and I want you to have your bedroom back. I hate feeling like a burden.â
You secure the lid to his drink when its finally complete. âOne heart attack in a cup.âÂ
âMy favourite.â His mask contorts around the eyes showing his smile. âOh Wolvieâs upstairs in bad shape. Something took a fuckinâ chunk outta him.â
âWhat the fuck Wade?! Why didnât you lead with that?â Youâre pulling off your apron and halfway around the counter before you remember your shift isnât over for another hour. Â
âCauseâ then you wouldnât have made my fast juice.â
Ah fuck it.
âDonât steal the cash register.â You warn the kid looking your way. âHeâll hunt you down and beat the crap out of you.â
Wade waves at the kid behind you, he has his macchiato in one hand and baby knife in his other for special effect. The kid gives a look of âJeezâ before returning to his work.
âYou coming?â You ask when your almost half way through the door.
âNah - saving innocents makes me hungy. Fork hands has his healing factor. He'll be fine.â Wade replies dismissively.
Huffing you turn on your heel and practically run to the apartment.Â
A chunk out of him?Â
Logan's healing factor was significantly better without the adamantium poisoning but surely he could die. In an instant youâre back in North Dakota, holding his hand as he fades away.Â
Your breath is heavy as you take the steps two at a time.Â
Not again.Â
The door is thrown open and instead of chaos you find the lights dimmed, candles all over the apartment and there Logan stands in a new plaid buttondown and his finest wranglers. Heâs holding a bouquet of sunflowers in those veined hands you love so much. It's like something out of a Danielle Steel novel and you utterly melt.
The panic that had clutched your heart recedes. Your anxiety releases its grip on you.Â
âYouâre not hurt?âÂ
âNo, bub. Iâm fine. Sorry for the clown. He offered to help and IâŚâ
You shake your head and smile at him, hesitantly you take a step forward. When youâre close enough he hands them your way. âI have it on good authority, theyâre your favourites.â
âThey are.â
âI wanna give you what you deserve, sweetheart.â He starts, it's like heâs rehearsed it in his head. Little do you know it's all his thought about for the past three weeks. âYou deserve more than a romp in the woods, or an alley.âÂ
He seems to cringe at this before continuing.
âIâm not like the other guy. He was a goddamn anchor being, hero through and through from what I hear about him. Iâm angry, I kill people and I drink too goddamn much, but when you look at me, I feel like I could be him.â For the first time, it is him that takes your hand in his much larger one. âDo you know how jealous of that asshole I am, Bub? That he got you first? That he got to have your uncomplicated love. If youâd been older in my timeline, I would'veâ met you first, I wouldnât have looked twice at another and Iâd have fallen for you the second you looked up at me from beneath those eyelashes, how could I not when everything about you is so easy to love?âÂ
Youâve always been a crier, and this is no different. The man is stamping down every single one of your insecurities, reassuring you as you go. Making you feel more loved then youâve ever felt before.
âI adore you. From your crappy cooking-â
â-Hey.â
âYour porny books you think I donât see, to the way you cry at movies, how much you love our daughter. I fuckinâ love you Y/N. Its messy and complicated, Iâm not sure if you could-â
In a total role reversal it is you who cuts him off, grabbing his face in your palms and dragging his face down to yours. Your mouths join for the first time in weeks, it is hot and full of desire and love. It's like the two of you are releasing all of your tension into this kiss, finally the air has been cleared and it's rejuvenating.Â
You press your forehead to his, gasping for breath as his kisses steal the air from your lungs.
âLo, I guarantee every version of me loves you, even if you were too blind to see it in your world.âÂ
âYou were a married woman in my world, bub.â
You gasp theatrically. âAdulturerer.â
âYouâve spent too much time with that fuckinâ idiot.â He kisses your lips, though you donât let it turn into anything deeper, as you pull back rubbing your nose against his.Â
âFornicator.âÂ
âtch⌠stop.â He groans, grabbing your ass pulling you into his bulge, you bite his lip with a giggle. âWhy do you have these lined up?â
He never gets his answer as he picks you up, wrapping your legs around his back and carries you through to the bedroom. You pull away from his mouth, looking over to the set dinner table.
âThe food⌠you went to all that effort!â He is kissing your neck, nipping and lathering the bites with his tongue.Â
âCanât cook for shit, darlinâ. Itâs take out, we can heat it up. Iâm hungry for your fuckinâ sweet cunt right now. â
Your lower stomach clenches at his positively filthy words, you join your lips back to his. His teeth nip at your lip as he plunges his tongue into your mouth, running the tip along your teeth.Â
Before there had been need, but now, youâre both desperate. Youâve had a mere taste of what the other has to offer and now youâve starved yourself for months.Â
âNot gonnaâ last long on the first, darlinâ.â He groans into your mouth as your hand works its way into his pants. He is eager as he throws you back onto the bed and is already working at peeling your black jeans down your legs. âThose fuckinâ shorts you sleep in, fuck. Iâve been dreaminâ about buryinâ myself in yaâ for weeks.â
âPlease, Lo.â Youâre not sure what youâre already begging for but you are desperate. Youâre left in your uniform tee and panties, as he slowly unbuttons his button down, slowly revealing the white undershirt beneath. Youâve never found collarbones particularly attractive, but the tanned skin stretched across his is quite frankly delectable.Â
You pull your shirt over your head, all too eager to be rid of the reminder of the job you should by all rights be at right now. Your bra is quick to follow.
âThose gorgeous tits, been thinking of these every fucking night.â You groan at his admission. He himself is shirtless, you have half a mind to return the same complement as your hands brush against his perfectly sculpted pecs.Â
This man was the perfect specimen, it was unfair, t shirts should be outlawed for him. He grabs the waistband of your panties.Â
âSniktâ and a rip sound and you are utterly bare before him, laying across Wadeâs bed.Â
Those gorgeous strong hands trace the planes of your body, circling your nipples before his mouth takes their place.Â
He groans as his hands descend to your core. âAll this for me? Iâm gonnaâ fuckinâ slide in, Baby.âÂ
And he does, two fingers push through your tight slick opening, three weeks of foreplay have left you soaking wet and wanting. How can you live with a man who looks the way he does, who consistently works out in the living room shirtless and not have the ocean in your panties.Â
It seems Logan has had all he can take as he slides a third finger in, pumping it in and out of you, rubbing at your clit with his thumb. Gasping you grab at your sheets desperate to anchor yourself.Â
He kisses up your breast, lavishing your chest in kisses and bites. Never enough to leave a mark but just enough to excite you.Â
When heâs at your neck he leans in, whispering into your ear. âIâm gonna fuckinâ ruin that pussy.â
You canât help it, maybe youâre a whore for this man, but you donât fucking care. Your legs part even further on the bed.
âPlease, Logan. I need you to fuck me.â
He grins savagely, pushing his already undone belt and jeans down his hips. Heâs back up and claiming your mouth, your legs wrapped around his ass, pulling you down to him before he knows it.Â
One hand is bearing his weight as the other disappears, he lines himself up at your entrance, the head of his cock breaching your folds. Heâs thick, thicker than you remember, but there isnât any discomfort this time. He settles for a moment, his forehead against yours. His mouth dips to join your lips, his tongue lashing out and fucking your mouth as his hips leap forward spearing you on his cock. The bed creaks with the power of his hips as he fucks you hard into the matress.Â
Skin slapping on skin is all that can be heard as he readjusts onto his knees, heâs desperate to be as deep as possible and you need the same thing.Â
âLo-â
âI know, darlinâ.â He grabs your waist, lifting you as if you weigh nothing at all and flips you over. Suddenly youâre astride him, your knees either side of his hips as his head rests in the pillows.Â
His eyes are distracted by your tits as he smirks, happy with the view.Â
You ache for him, so you reach down, lining his thick purple headed member with your core before you sink down in one stroke, his extended groan absolutely wrecks you as his big hands come to rest on the meat of your hips.Â
You rest your hands on his amply hair covered chest, using his pecs as leverage before you raise your hips before slamming back down and bottoming him out.Â
Heâs so deep inside you, the tip of him must be brushing your goddamn cervix as you raise yourself once more, until he almost slips out before meeting his hips once more.Â
Loganâs strength never fails to surprise you as his hands follow your lead yet help lift you through the manoeuvre.Â
Youâre bouncing on his cock, quick rise and fall sporadically grinding your clit deliciously into his pelvis.Â
Logan feels fucking amazing inside of you, maybe its been the buildup of weeks but you find yourself heading towards the dive faster than ever before.Â
âRide my cock,sweetheart. Thatâs it, make yourself feel good.â
Gasping at his words and the change of position as he sits up, wrapping his arms around you and claiming your mouth. The second you find the angle that feels amazing against your clit, you hit it again and again, grinding hard against him.
âLo - Iâm gonna ⌠Iâm gonna -â You crash before you can get the words out, your toes curl by his knees and your whole body seizes in ecstasy. The world feels right as the stars appear behind your eyes.
The world stopped for you for a moment but not for Logan. He has bought his knees up and is pistoning his hips into your contorting body. Heâs holding you against him, groaning into your neck as he continues to fuck your clenching pussy relentlessly.
âOh fuck ⌠your so fucking tight. Fucking perfect cunt- made - for - me.â He growls into your neck, but youâre too cock drunk to hear it properly, as he frantically thrusts his powerful hips up and into you.Â
âWhere? â He pulls back, never slowing his hips as he grabs your cheeks with one hand. Your sweat laden face, vacant and looking back at him, your cunt hasnât stopped clenching around him as he plunders your depths, his voice is strained as he asks again âDarlinâ...you gotta ⌠tell me ⌠where?â
â...inside, Lo. Please come inside meâŚâ Your so overstimulated, you could cry. The sound of his balls slapping against skin as he thrusts upwards deep inside of you, whilst he pulls your body down. Heâs so fucking deep inside of you, your pussy squelching from a mixture of precum and your arousal.
With another string of lewd words heâs coming hard, Loganâs head has fallen back against the headboard exposing the thick chords of muscle, you can't help sinking your teeth into it, you dip your hand and rub at your clit clumsily, youâre so fucking overstimulated from watching him you follow him over the precipice once more, giving him an insanely tight sheath to come in.Â
âThatâs it, take it all, sweetheartâ He groans as he continues to slowly pump his seed deep within you
Gasping you fall slack in his arms, your bones are jelly and your muscles ache, you really are a pillow princess.Â
âStill with me?â You manage to nod your clammy forehead against his pec, you currently have your cheek squished against. He chuckles, as he lies back against the pillows, leaving his cock still inside of you, you can feel him leaking out of you as he softens a little, recovering for what you imagine will be another enthusiastic round if history is a teacher.Â
You are utterly fucked out as you lie on his chest, listening to his breath with his cum slowly leaking from your abused hole.Â
The two of you have never needed words, you lie against his chest, the hands you adore so much, come out to stroke your hair.
Rubbing soothingly at your scalp before running his calloused fingers through the locks and repeating.Â
When youâve finally gathered enough strength you lean on your hands, looking up at him.
âWelcome back, bub.â
âHello.â You smile shyly, like you hadnât just sunk your canines into his neck whilst wantonly riding his cock to oblivion.Â
âYou okay?â He asks, his hand rising to stroke your swollen bottom lip.
âSomeone fucked me brain dead - but yeah, Iâm good.â You smirk, nipping at his thumb.
He grins wolfishly and chuckles with his whole body, the movement causes his cock to move inside of you. Slowly you feel him hardening once more.
âYou can still talk, Darlinâ. Means I havenât done my job properly.â The predatory gaze in his eyes excites and scares you in equal parts. Though youâre probably asking for trouble when you take his thumb back in your mouth.Â
It's light outside when you finally have to tap out.Â
Your pussy is aching, your ass is stinging from the new sensation, your jaw throbs and your entire body is boneless.Â
You canât quite catch your breath and your cunt is leaking so much cum, that youâre probably 10% Logan at this point.Â
The Wolverine has utterly devoured you, making up for three weeks of torment in one night. Though heâs not all bad as he feeds you noodles from chopsticks as you lay on his muscled hair laden thighs.Â
When Logan had suggested food, youâd had to stop him from eating Wontons from your belly button as none of your holes were currently operational.Â
The two of you have dressed, though that is a strong use of the word as youâre wearing only his button down and him only his underwear.Â
Youâre lazing on the couch watching reruns of Friends as your bed sorely needs fresh sheets and a new base. Poor Wade, youâd have to replace it before you move out. Like he could read your mind, Logan begins.Â
âI found a new place, its nothing fancy but its got four walls and no roommates.â You smile at him around your mouthful of noodles as he takes his own bite.
Sitting up you smile. âThatâs great news, Lo.â
âI uh- wanted to see, if youâd wanna come with me.â
You canât help your grin.Â
fin.
I am currently posting this at the airport before my flight. I love you all! đ
there's always that one thing in your head that you've ALWAYS and I mean always wanted to say but you're just a scared little girl bc what if NO ONE MATCHES YOUR FREAK but then like angels draped in white cloth, someone else says it. This post is that one thing. For me at least smh. đđđđđ
carlos sainz in that suit keeps making me wanna be his clumsy secretary that cant get shit right so he has to fuck me dumb in order for me to get my job right for once đđđđđđ so down bad for him omg
look at my husband, THE WAY YOU MANAGE TO STAY GOATED IS SO TUFF TWIN
⨠max's 64 wins!! â¨
(updated this post)
â đ Ě. max verstappen x reader â đ Ě.
you've been friends with max for as long as you can remember, it takes a redbull engineer asking you out for both of you to realise you want more. (so much softness and longing)
alternative ending possessive version can be read here
You couldnât remember the exact day you two had become friends. It was some day in middle school, you were sure of that. But the details had blurred over the years. It felt like you had always known each other.
Max had always been in your life.
You had always been in his.
Sitting in each otherâs orbits just felt naturalâthough entirely platonic. That was the part others struggled to understand.
It was laughable the amount of times waiters had brought candles to your dinner table, 'for the mood', assuming the two of you were on a date. You'd stop correcting them after the third time it happened. Besides, it was fun to laugh about. To joke about how much you'd annoy each other if you really were a couple.
"You snore like a bear," you said, laughing over a glass of red wine, "I pity your future girlfriend."
"Doesnât seem to bother you too much."
âFor a free hotel room, Iâll put up with anything.â
He laughed.
After all these years of sporadically sharing hotel rooms, late night drives, unlimited paddock passesand crude jokesâyou two had stayed simply good friends. He'd held you through bad break ups and you had held him through every DNF and every crash. You knew eachother like the back of your hand. Friends for life, that was what you always said.
Until things started to shift. Slowly. Subtly. So gently that neither of you really noticed.
It was Free Practice.
Rain had settled over the city days ago and showed no sign of stopping anytime soon. The paddock was chaosâengineers scrambling to keep tires warm, trainers trying to keep drivers from catching colds.
Max stood calm in the middle of it all. You watched him, helmet in hand, exchanging quiet words with GP. It was always a strange sort of magic, how he could look so at home in the stormâlike it was made for him.
You smiled to yourself.
Heâd be fine today. You knew it.
âSo, how long have you been together?â
The voice broke you from your thoughts.
You blinked, turning to find Marcusâone of the newer engineersâlooming beside your seat. Tall, a bit cocky, but charming in a way that probably worked for him.
âWhat?â you asked, unsure if youâd misheard.
âYou and Max. Been together long?â
You snorted. âOh. No. We arenât together. Just friends, yâknow?â
It wasnât the first time someone has misunderstood your relationship with Max. Hell, it wasnât even the first time someone from Red Bull had made the mistake. Marcus glanced back toward Max, then returned his gaze to you with a slow smirk.
âDamn. And here I thought I had no chance.â He grinned. âYou free tonight? Iâd love to take you for a drink.â
You opened your mouth, then closed it again. Your brain fumbled for an excuse, but none came fast enough.
âSure,â you found yourself saying. âWhy not.â
Barely a few minutes later, Max is by your side, throwing a tyre blanket over you to keep warm.
âItâd be unfortunate if you died of hypothermia before you saw me win on Sunday.â
âYeah, what would you do without your only supporter cheering in the crowd?â You joked, burrowing into the blanket and sighing from the sudden warmth.
âIâd be lost without you,â he said, mock-solemnly. But there was a warmth in his voice that caught you slightly off-guard.
Max had told you to wear an extra jacket this morning. You had ignored him. He was pretty smug about it, but it didnât stop him from trying to warm you upâeven going as far as to offer his own jacket. As if he wasn't also standing out in the cold.
âDinner tonight?â He asked, sipping on his water bottle and moving to sit beside you.
âUh, Iâve got plans actually.â
Max raised an eyebrow. âPlans? With who?â
âMarcus,â you answered, feeling a strange knot form in your stomach. âHe asked me out for a few drinks.â
âOh.â
Max didnât say anything for a moment, but his gaze flickered briefly to Marcus, cold and stiff, before returning to you. There was something unreadable in his expression.
âWell,â he said, his voice casual but slow, jaw tight and face still, âHe seems⌠nice. I guess.â
You smiled slightly, though it didnât feel true. You were unable to keep the small flicker of guilt from beating in your chest.
That night, as you found yourself in the dimly lit bar, nursing a glass of wine with Marcus, you couldnât shake the feeling that something was... off. Not with Marcus, exactly. He was a decent guyâcharming in that way that could probably win anyone overâbut the whole time, you couldnât stop thinking about Max.
Suddenly a text came through. You knew who it was before you even checked.
Going ok?
Marcus leaned over to see the message. He scoffed slightly, âI thought you werenât together?â
âWe arenât.â
âThen why is he checking on you? Need his permission to go out?â
âOf course I donât. He justâŚâ you werenât sure how to phrase it. âHe just likes to know Iâm ok.â
Another text came through, you angled your phone towards your chest so Marcus wouldnât see:
I can pretend to be sick if you want to leave.
Then another:
I can see you reading these⌠is he that boring?
You laughed slightly and put your phone away.
It was ridiculous. You were here with someone else. Yet Maxâs face kept slipping into your thoughts, his teasing smile, the way he always seemed to have your back without even trying. The way he cared so effortlessly. Always checking to make sure you were safe, you were happy.
When the evening ended and Marcus walked you back to your hotel, you could tell he wanted to kiss you. But a pit formed in your stomach at the thought of it. So you just smiled, thanked him for a nice night (not a great night, but a nice one) and quickly walked into your hotel room.
Being alone again was a breath of fresh air.
The next day, quali day, you found yourself wandering the paddock, watching the flurry of activity around you as everyone prepared. Max was in his element, once again, focusing completely on the task ahead. But when he saw you, that familiar, soft smile curved across his face.
âSurvived last night?â he asked, walking over to you, his voice a mix of teasing and genuine concern.
You rolled your eyes, though you couldnât stop the tiny smile that tugged at your lips.
You rolled your eyes, though the corners of your mouth tugged upward despite your best effort. âBarely. I think I hit my lifetime quota of polite smiles. I can only listen to guys explain their workout routine for so long.â
Max let out a low laugh. âSounds fucking borning.â
You bumped his arm with your elbow, the familiar rhythm of your banter helping smooth the awkward edge that had hung in the air since last night. âMaybe I just have high standards.â
He tilted his head, eyes steady on yours. âMaybe you just went out with the wrong guy.â
The words hit you in the chest harder than you expected. You opened your mouthâhalf to laugh it off, half to challenge itâbut nothing came out.
Max seemed to catch himself, blinking once, then glancing toward the garages like he hadnât said anything at all. âAnyway,â he said, softer now, âGlad you survived.â
âI always do,â you replied, your voice not quite as light as you meant it to be.
Another pause. A quieter one.
Then he asked, âDid he try anything?â
You looked up at him, surprised by the questionânot because he asked, but because of the way he asked. Not teasing. Not brotherly. Just⌠careful. Like he wasnât sure he wanted to know.
âNo,â you said. âIt wasnât like that. I donât think I wanted it to be.â
Max nodded once, but didnât say anything. His jaw ticked slightly. You noticed.
Before you could decide what it meant, one of the Red Bull crew called his name from across the paddock, breaking the moment in two.
He started to walk off, then hesitated. âYouâll be watching?â
âYou even have to ask?â
He smiled at that, something warmer than victory flickering in his expression.
And just like that, he disappeared into the crowd, leaving you standing there with a hundred unsaid things heavy on your tongue.
Max dragged the car to pole, of course.
By the time the final times were locked in, your voice was hoarse from cheering and your heart felt like it had been running laps alongside him. You waited until the press was done pulling him in every direction before slipping backstage near the motorhome.
He spotted you instantly, eyes lighting up under the brim of his cap. âThere she is.â
You didnât hesitate. You threw your arms around his neck and held tight, letting him feel the full weight of how proud you were. âYou killed it out there.â
He laughed into your shoulder. âYou think?â
âI know.â
When you pulled back, his hands lingered at your waist, grounding you. The smile on his face softened as his gaze dipped lower, hovering somewhere near your mouth.
You swallowed. He didnât say anything elseâjust gave your hip the lightest squeeze. You thought he would step back, like he always did after a celebratory hug. But instead he stayed there. His eyes remained locked on yours.
âWhat?â You asked.
âNothing.â His eyes flicked to someone behind you, then back to you.
âNothing,â Max repeated, but there was a flicker of something in his voice. Something restrained. âJust⌠youâre here. Thatâs all.â
You huffed out a small laugh, though your heartbeat was climbing at a concerning rate. âWhere else would I be?â
He didnât answer that. Didnât need to. You both knew where he was thinking ofâacross a bar table from a different guy, smiling politely, checking your phone too often.
Someone called Maxâs name againâsharper this time. He blinked, like surfacing from deep water, then slowly stepped back. His hands dropped from your waist. You tried not to feel the loss of warmth too acutely.
âIâll see you later,â he said, already backing away.
You nodded, watching him go. The moment, so suddenly, over. The warmth of his hands on your hips lingering after he had gone.
Later that night, you found yourself standing in the hallway outside Maxâs hotel room, quietly debating whether or not to knock. He had texted earlierâMovie? My room? Just us?âlike it was the most casual thing in the world.
But it didnât feel casual.
Not anymore.
You knocked.
The door opened almost instantly. He mustâve been waiting.
He stood there in sweatpants and a hoodie, barefoot, hair still slightly damp from a shower. Your gaze dropped instinctively to the nape of his neck, the clean skin of his collarbone and familiar freckles.
He stepped aside without saying a word, and you moved past him into the room.
It was quiet inside, dim and warm. The curtains were drawn, a movie already paused on the screenâsome familiar, ridiculous action flick with explosions every other minute. You smiled.
âGot snacks,â Max said, moving to the side table. âBut no wine. Sorry.â
âGuess Iâll survive,â you said softly, taking off your jacket.
He sat on the bed, remote in one hand, and gave you a small smile that was all shyness and something a little deeper. âYou coming?â
You joined him, sitting close enough that your shoulders touched.
The movie played.
You tried to focus, really, you did. But the warmth of his leg against yours, the way his fingers occasionally brushed the comforter close to your handâit was pulling all your attention away from the screen.
And then it happened. Slowly. Like everything else with him.
Your head dropped to his shoulder.
He didnât flinch. Didnât move. Just let you stay there. Like heâd been waiting for it to happen. Hoping it would. You felt, more than heard, the breath he released. It ghosted across your hairline.
âI missed you last night,â he said, barely a whisper.
Your heart stuttered. âYou knew where I was.â
âDoesnât mean I liked it.â
You turned your head to look up at him. He was already looking down at you.
A beat of silence stretched between you. His hand twitched at his side, like he wanted to reach for you but wasnât sure he was allowed to.
So you reached first.
Your fingers curled into the fabric of his hoodie, tugging him a little closer.
âI saw you walking back with him last night,â Max went on, his voice rougher now. âAnd all I could think about was how he got to be the one beside you. Even if it was nothing. Even if it didnât mean anything. I hated it.â
The silence stretched out.
âI didnât kiss Marcus,â you said, âbecause I couldnât stop thinking about how it would feel if it were you.â
He swallowed hard, his gaze flickering down to your mouth. âDonât say that unless you mean it.â
âI do.â
Another breath. Then, finally, his hand rose to your cheekâtentative at first, almost reverent. Like he couldnât believe he was allowed to touch you this way. His thumb traced just below your cheekbone, and his eyes were full of something deep and aching.
When he kissed you, it wasnât sudden. It was slow. Careful. Like heâd been dreaming about it for so long he didnât want to get it wrong. His lips moved against yours with a kind of quiet desperation, like he was pouring years of longing into the space between you.
You melted into him instantly.
And when you finally pulled back, breathless and heart thundering, Max rested his forehead against yours, eyes still closed.
âIâve wanted that for so long,â he whispered.
âI know,â you whispered back, smiling. âMe too.â
He opened his eyes, and they were softer now. Unshielded. âPlease tell me this isnât just for tonightâ
âItâs not,â you said. You knew then, as you think you knew years ago, that this was it for you. Max was always where you were meant to end up.
hope you enjoyed <3 i've never written this trope before so apologise if it dragged a bit! as always requests are open!
The parallels are crazy
You think you're the painter, but you're actually just the canvas
155 posts