Recent events between Phee and Tech have you feeling... well to put it bluntly, have you feeling jealous.
2.4k words - first person - gender neutral
Tags: Reader x Tech, GN Reader (let me know if I used anything gender specific and I will edit it out), Jealous!Reader, Best Friend!Hunter, mild spoilers for Season 2 Episode 13, pining, angst, fluff, love confessions, kissing
I would like to preface this by stating for the record, I am in no way against the direction they are going with Tech and Phee. I love that they are leading toward a canon romance (or at the very least hinting at it). However, posts made by people voicing their own opinions have inspired me to write this because I've never written a jealous!reader before and it sounded fun. Now that that’s out of the way, enjoy!
I had been cordial, friendly even with Phee. She was decent… for a pirate. Not that we had been much better in recent times, so who was I to judge? But what had me sucking at my teeth while I glared from my seat behind Tech was the way she was touching him. So familiar. And this nickname she had for him always made my stomach twist. ‘Brown eyes.’ How creative of her. I shouldn’t be so mad at her. She was going to help us afterall. Stars I just… I can’t figure out why she rubs the wrong way so hard.
I was silent as the dead the whole trip to wherever she was taking us. I hadn’t realized I was clenching my jaw until it unclenched. My whole mouth fell slack at the sight of this small island civilization. Beautiful blue waters surrounded a mountain dotted with small white huts. It looked so peaceful, so serene. Tech landed the Maurauder at the peak of the mountain, where there stood a tall tree and an even taller temple-like structure. As I stepped out of the ship the warm sun hit my skin and I sighed in relief. My seething anger melted away from me almost instantly.
A man, whom Phee referred to as Shep appeared on the platform, along with a young girl. She hugged the man, which made my anger melt even more. Maybe this was her husband and child? Maybe she’s just really friendly by nature. Then I overheard Wrecker make a joking comment towards Tech.
“Looks like you’ve got some competition.” He nudged Tech with his elbow to emphasize the remark. I bit my cheek and rolled my eyes, a gesture Hunter couldn’t help but notice. I relaxed a little when I took notice of Tech’s utter confusion towards Wrecker’s remark as he lowered his datapad. Phee then introduced Shep to us as the mayor of this island, Pabu, and his daughter Lyanna. Phee proceeded to list us off by name, Omega, myself, Hunter, Wrecker, and then Tech. My anger flared back up just a little when she saved Tech’s name for last, but I quickly attempted to stomp out the internal flame. Hunter was giving me a side eye, which meant I wasn’t quick enough about it.
After the introductions were made, Shep invited us all to eat with them at his home. As we were leaving the platform, Phee stated that she would catch up. Tech lingered behind the group, she said something to him and left. He turned around smiling and proceeded to catch up. I noticed his grin and his body language when they were talking, and I felt twinge. It wasn’t anger or hatred. This was something else entirely. I was so lost in thought I hadn’t realized that I was becoming a straggler, lingering so far behind the group that I couldn’t hear what any of them were saying. It didn’t matter. My heart pounded in my ears and I could feel a lump forming in my throat. I didn’t want to feel like this, not when everyone else was so happy. Yet here I was, turning green with jealousy. Worse yet, I couldn’t understand why. I turned my head to look out at the water as I walked, hoping the view would calm me as it had before. I was so focused that I didn’t notice Hunter blocking my path until it was too late.
I would have walked square into his chest if he hadn’t grabbed me by the shoulder with a gentle, yet firm hand. The contact startled me and I let out a small yell and clutched my chest.
“Hunter! You nerf-herder nearly gave me a heart attack,” I exclaimed.
He was silent for a moment and then responded with a simple, “Your heart’s fine. Your head is what I’m concerned about.”
I tried to feign confusion. I knew exactly what he was talking about, but I was hoping if I acted dumb he wouldn’t pry. As usual, it didn’t work. He shouted up to the rest of the group that we would catch up in a minute, then turned his attention back to me.
“Talk to me. What’s going on? You’ve been off all day.” He was looking at me with that sincere concerned look he gets, and I knew I couldn’t hide what was bothering me. I sighed and fell against the wall to my right.
“It’s… Phee.” I started, struggling to get the words out.
“I figured out that much,” he stood in front of me, folding his arms over his chest. “The question is why does she make you so angry?”
I froze. My heart dropped into my stomach. I knew why. I had figured it out moments before the collision with Hunter. I wasn’t ready to say yet. Not fully.
“Because…” I hesitated, looking everywhere but Hunter’s eyes.
“Because?” He echoed.
I sighed heavily. I couldn’t say it. I physically couldn’t make the words take form, despite them being right on the tip of my tongue. I was struggling and he could tell. He stepped closer to me and I felt a caloused hand touch my cheek carefully. I finally let myself look at him. He had this knowing look on his face.
“Do you need me to say it for you?” He asked. I bit my lip and shook my head in agreement. There was no way of knowing if he actually knew what was running through my mind, but it did always kind of feel like he could read minds sometimes.
“You’re in love with Tech.”
He stated it so easily. Like it wasn’t the most planet shattering phrase in the galaxy. Tears welled in my eyes and I whispered a barely audible, “Yes.”
Hunter pulled me into a tight hug as the tears began to fall, and then the verbal floodgates released.
“I can’t stand it, Hunter. Seeing the two of them together. She’s always flirting with him. Touching him or calling ‘Brown Eyes.” What kind of kriffing nickname is that anyways? ‘Brown Eyes’? You all have brown eyes! At least be more original than that! But that’s not even the worst part. The worst part is the way he looks at her. He would never look at me like that…”
“That you’ve seen…” Hunter mutters under his breath. I pull away and stare at him with a furrowed brow.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I questioned.
“Nothing. I think you should talk to Tech. Tell him how you feel. If he feels the same then you can stop feeling so jealous. If he doesn’t… then at least you have closure.” He grabs my shoulder one last time and gives it a squeeze. “Think about it over dinner, okay?”
“Okay…” I responded.
I gathered myself and we headed toward the home of the Mayor. Dinner felt… long. Scratch that. It felt like an eternity. Phee was her usual self, and Tech seemed to actually be enjoying it. I felt sick. I couldn’t eat anymore. I stood up from the table abruptly and excused myself. I wasn’t sure where I was going to go, but I needed to get away from there. I decided to go back to the ship. I raced up the steps as fast as my legs would carry me. I don’t even think I was halfway there before I got winded and had to stop for breath. I felt far enough away that I could at least take my time now. I decided to take a break to watch the sunset, hoping that it would make me feel better. It was sort of working to calm my nerves, until I heard my name being called by a familiar voice. I turned my head to catch a glimpse of Tech, running up the steps towards me. His long legs carried him up two or three steps at a time. My heart raced and I panicked. I couldn’t face him like this. I turned quickly from him and began sprinting back up the steps, with him in tow and gaining. I was already exhausted from booking it up the steps before and my endurance was nothing compared to a clone’s, so it was a given that he was going to eventually catch up to me. I at least managed to get to the landing second to the top before he got to me. He caught my hand in his and my heart leapt inside my chest.
He was breathing hard from the exertion, “What…is…going…on?” He spoke, panting between his words.
“Just…leave…me…alone.” I panted back. I pulled my hand from his, despite wanting to keep it there forever. I tried to move to continue my climb, but I was too slow. His hands pressed into my shoulders and shoved me against the wall. My eyes widened at the show of brute force he was exhibiting. It wasn’t like him to use his strength like this. I had almost forgotten that, despite his differing physique, he was meant to be as strong as any other clone. There was escaping now, but I could still refuse to look in his eyes. If I did, I was sure I would break.
“Why are you running from me?” He still sounded exhausted, but his voice was like music to me. I sighed deeply and looked up at the sky, anything but his eyes. He lowered his head and continued to speak.
“Hunter…said I should be the one to come after you,” he admitted.
“That mud-scuffer…” I muttered.
Tech laughed, it was dry and tired, but it gave me chills. I was breaking already and I wasn’t even looking at him.
“Why didn’t he want me to catch you? Why are you running? And why… why won’t you look at me?” I could hear pain in his voice. I didn’t want to cause him pain. That was the last thing I wanted. I bit into my lower lip and finally met his stare. His eyes were filled with worry. He was looking straight into mine and I felt it. I was breaking. There was nothing stopping it.
“Please…” I pleaded with him in one last feeble attempt. “Please Tech… don’t.”
“I know something is wrong…” He ignored my pleas. “You can tell me anything. You know that.”
He was right. I am usually so open with him, so why should this be any different. Just tell him how I feel, be rejected and move on. Like Hunter said.
“I…” I start, but lose my train of thought when I look into his eyes. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the wall. Just say it already.
“I love you.”
My heart was pounding so loudly I wasn’t sure if he had responded and I couldn’t hear him, or if he was being unusually silent. I couldn’t bear to look at him. I didn’t want to see his eyes, the look of betrayal over my confession. Or the confusion. I couldn’t take it. I just wanted him to tell me doesn’t feel the same way so this could all be over. Finally I felt movement, his hands left my shoulders. I still didn’t dare look at him, keeping my eyes shut tight and my head against the wall. Still nothing from him. Maybe he left. I finally decided to open my eyes, to see if he truly had just walked away. But I couldn’t have been more wrong.
He was standing in front of me, looking magnificent with the sunset behind him. His hands were limp at his sides. I took my time working my way to his eyes. Wanting to avoid the moment for just a little longer. His mouth hung open slightly in shock. Finally I made it to his eyes, but they didn’t have the look I had been expecting. There was shock, which was to be expected, but something else. Something… contemplative.
“Tech, I–” I began, but the moment I spoke he moved in towards me. His hands found my neck and jaw, much softer than Hunter’s were, and fitting there perfectly as if they were made to hold me. Tech’s body was pressed completely against mine, with one of his legs tucked between mine. His face wasn’t even an inch from mine, as he nuzzled my nose with his own. My breath hitched in my throat as he spoke. His voice was still familiar, but the tone was foreign. He spoke low and with a heat I had never heard come from him before.
“Say it again,” he requested.
“I– I love you, Tech,” I confessed once more, as I leaned into his hand. And then his lips were on mine. Soft and gentle, patiently waiting for me to confirm that this action was okay. I kissed him back, pressing into him and reveling in this moment. He hummed happily and deepened the kiss. We continued like this till the sun had set completely. Finally we broke apart for air and he pressed his forehead to mine.
I needed to hear him say the words. So I leaned back, wanting to see him say it. Then I breathlessly asked, “Do you love me?”
“Emotions are a complex concept, and I don’t fully believe that words can be utilized to sum up one's feelings at any given point. But… if I had to put a word to what I am feeling, then… yes. Love is about as close to explaining how I feel about you.” He responded, making even that absurdly roundabout ‘yes’ sound sexy.
I laughed, “I wouldn’t have expected you to say you love me in any other way.”
“Am I truly that predictable?” He looked a little offended.
“Hmm… occasionally.” I responded. “For example, I didn’t know what to expect from you when I confessed. But I do know what you’re going to say next.”
“Do you now?” He cocked his head in amusement.
“Mmhm. You’re going to say we should head back before the others begin to worry,” I replied.
His eyes widened slightly, “How did yo–”
“I know you,” I shrugged, grabbing him by the arm. “So, let’s head back. There’s plenty of time for… this, later.”
He blushed a little at the thought, and agreed to head back down to the Mayor’s home. I finally felt at ease. I hope the rest of the night is more relaxing.
Masterlist
HE LOOKS SO GOOD 😭😭
Hunter: What’s the expression? Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice... fiddle-dee-dee.
Crosshair: Fool me once, and I’ll be fooled for a day. Teach me how to fool people, and I’ll be fooled for the rest of my life.
Wrecker: Fool me once, fool me twice, fool me chicken soup with rice.
Tech: I do believe that’s the expression.
I named my cat after you because she pulls your facial expressions sometimes
Good call.
Hunter: I get really nervous when I talk to cute people.
Wrecker: Aww… WAIT A MINUTE.
Tech: Are you, by chance, insinuating that our physical traits are to be deemed undesirable therefore the barrier of communication is not at all hindered on your end—
Crosshair: Yes. He’s calling you ugly, Tech.
Wrecker: HEY asshole, you’re included in this too!
*Hunter has left the chat*
Tech: Yes I do believe that Hunter’s term was plural, therefore it includes everyone in this group with whom he interacts. The result is that he does not exhibit any signs of disquietude because we are, to put it plainly, ugly.
Crosshair: Speak for yourself.
dilf rebirth
Swear this was anonymous but thank you ❤️
Hello! I know you're with Tech and all which is why I can't stress enough about asking you on a platonic date to watch pirates of the caribbean
- Anon
You're on. I'll bring my copy of the "Buccaneers of the Akkadese Maelstrom" trilogy and some fruit sushi and we'll make a night of it.
We saw how that mess hall fight went... Don't think this is a smart idea
Tech: We do not require supervision, Hunter.
Crosshair: Yeah, we’re both grown-ass adults!
Echo: Guys, your dino nuggets are ready. I also got your favorite juice boxes.
Hunter: …
Crosshair: …
Tech: …
Echo: …
Hunter: What was that about being “grown-ass adults”?
Crosshair, grabbing a juice box: Shut up.
Fully headcanon Crosshair to be a David Bowie listener. Idk what it is there's just something about his music that makes me think of @superiorsniper
content: penetrative sex, crosshair needs a hug (a lot more in reality but we don't have time for all of that folks)
yeah idrk. this might be shit. i just have a weakness for rough exterior soft interior characters. you guys know.
THIS FIC CONTAINS NSFW CONTENT. IF YOU ARE NOT 18+ DNI
find here on ao3 ~ taglist form
read under cut
You’re under him getting your insides rearranged when you feel his hand slither up your body. His rough skin caresses yours with the touch of almost an entirely different person, slowly trailing up your body until he interlocks your fingers together and stills there, a grunt leaving his parted lips.
The way your eyes open in shock isn't intentional. No, really, you swear it isn't. You're just taken by surprise, is all. You know he's not having a good day, and judging by the pent-up way he takes you after a week of separation, probably not having a good week either.
Crosshair slowly starts moving again, dark and louder grunts escaping his closed mouth with each jerk that sends your chin dipping up and eyes rolling back again. It's dizzying how he anchors both of you with where your hands meet and hold each other; you want to gaze toward them, look at him and see if he's looking at the connection but his thrusts are making it too damn hard.
Instead, you just squeeze his hand softly with a small whine. And he stops completely. For a moment you're scared he's not breathing. But then he exhales a heavy sigh, letting his body fall onto yours completely. You gasp slightly, almost feeling suffocated, but as he adjusts to rest the side of his face beside you, kissing your temple softly and rocking his hips again, you're pleasantly surprised at how smothered you feel, in the best way possible.
Then, he squeezes your hand, tight, and continues working at his pleasure without any regard for you (Not that you really mind, you already came from his fingers alone). But he's so oddly gentle, sort of intimate, fucking you almost like a lover instead of a release he always seems to take from you greedily.
You decide to tease him a little. With a small smile playing across your lips, you turn and whisper to him,
"Going soft on me?"
The loudest noise comes out of him today; a surprised, yet delighted chuckle as he chuckles his head and squeezes your hand again, using the other to grip your waist and readjust you softly. He looks into your eyes, and you swear if you could turn his irises into something touchable you would sink right in `cause you have never seen him looking so delicately ready to break.
"Don't even dare suggest it," He barks with no bite. You just roll your eyes and take your free hand, wrapping it around his neck and bringing him down for a kiss. You won't, because if you call it out too much he'll stop immediately and you'll never get it back again. And you think you like this part of Crosshair.
dividers by @saradika ~ tags: @pb-jellybeans @corrieguards @badbatchbabe @ladytano420 @jediknightjana @sleepycreativewriter @shinyshayminflower @thebahdbitch @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius @anotherschuylersister @starrylothcat
young!silco x gn!reader - 3.6k words - SFW
cw: angst, fluff, breakup conversations, happy ending, reconciliation, arguments, silco struggling with his emotions, little bit possessive, soft silco, suggestive ending (this one is pretty angsty but don’t worry, it all works out in the end!)
summary: Silco, your long time boyfriend, does something you’d begged him not to, so you regretfully decide that you need a break from him. Silco has other plans.
You didn't want to go. Not really.
But after Vander’s revelation, you felt like you had no choice.
Silco had been all fired up the night before, ranting and raving about his latest (and quite frankly terrible) plan of breaking into the Sheriff’s office Topside to gain information about any upcoming raids in your neighbourhood.
The surprise Enforcer raids had been hitting businesses across Zaun at random, an M.O of storming in and ransacking each place with no clear means or motive, and definitely without any warning.
Understandably then, Vander, Silco, and you had been particularly concerned that a raid would hit The Last Drop any day now, and despite every effort to hide anything that could give you away, there was a real fear that your revolutionary group would be discovered and brutally dismantled.
But the idea of breaking into the Sheriff’s office of all places was beyond dangerous and to your frustration, you just couldn’t get Silco to listen to reason.
You’d pleaded with him not to do something so risky. You’d tried to calm down, told him to just wait until you could all discuss it together as a group and come up with a plan that wasn’t so grandiose, and in your view, completely and utterly stupid.
Eventually, Silco had gotten frustrated and rolled his eyes, grumbling that he wouldn’t go as he’d slunk off downstairs to no doubt drink the night away in the bar.
This morning you’d woken with him fast asleep by the side of you in bed and, assuming he’d wasted the evening drinking himself dry, you thought nothing of it until later this afternoon when you’d found out the truth from Vander.
Silco had gone Topside to scout out the building that housed the Sheriff’s office.
Vander had desperately tried to reassure you that Silco wouldn’t have done anything stupid but it had done absolutely nothing to douse the flames of anger and hurt spreading through you.
The damage was done.
Now, salty tears finally drying on your cheeks, you stand in your shared bedroom packing your belongings into the rucksack laid out on your bed.
Silco is still out running errands so there's a note placed carefully on the desk in your bedroom. It's not ideal, but it's for the best.
However cowardly it makes you feel to reduce your breakup to a measly note, you're too emotionally drained to even think about having another argument with him.
You just can’t deal with it right now.
Planning to stay with a friend until you found somewhere you could afford by yourself, you convince yourself that if he truly wants you back, if he truly wants to fix things, he’ll come and find you.
You’ve already packed the easy things, like most of your clothes and your toiletries from the bathroom. The real challenge now it would seem is the more sentimental items, like the pile of gifts currently lined up on the bed that you’d received from Silco over the years.
The little toy poro he'd scrimped and saved to buy you for your birthday that one year. Or the matching sunglasses he'd stolen as a little souvenir from your third date.
As you stare down at the gifts on the bed wondering if you’ll have enough room to bring them all, the door opens behind you.
You freeze, knowing exactly who it is before he’s even spoken.
"There you are," Silco announces, his voice clearly tired but still laced with a hint of relief. "Vander said you were-"
He cuts himself off as he undoubtedly takes in the state of the bedroom before speaking again in a tone of pure shock.
"What are you doing?"
You can’t bring yourself to answer so instead busy yourself with shoving all of the gifts into your bag before he can see them.
"No," he breathes out from the doorway as it dawns on him.
It sends a horrible pang of hurt ringing in your chest, only made worse when he pleadingly says your name.
"Please don't do this."
"I have to, Silco," you sigh, trying to keep your heart as closed off as you can. It hurts enough as it is without you letting your emotions run wild.
"You don't,” he says. “You don't have to."
You stop answering because you can tell this particular line of conversation will just go in circles.
Behind you, he shuts the door with a click and it irritates you into shoving more into the bag, no longer caring about being neat or if you should leave anything behind.
"Is this because of what happened last week? I already told you that wasn't my fault," Silco continues when you don’t respond or turn to face him.
He's referring to the incident where he almost got shot after taunting some enforcers for no good reason.
Truth be told, that incident had absolutely terrified you, but it was just one of the many reasons why you couldn’t keep doing this.
"No, it isn't because of that," you say flatly.
"Then why?"
You finally turn to look at him, the first time since he’d left the bar this morning. (He looks gorgeous and like he's on the verge of heartbreak and you hate that you still love him despite it all.)
"Where did you go last night?" you ask flatly, looking him square in the eyes.
As expected his expression instantly turns stony, but after years of learning and reading his tells, you can see the twitches of regret in his eyes.
A few beats of silence pass and you know he’s too stubborn to admit it out loud.
Your response is quiet. Resigned.
"That's why."
Turning back round to face the bed, you begin to shove down all your belongings as far down into the bag as they can go, making sure you have enough room for the last bits that you know are in the wardrobe.
"Look, I'm sorry for doing it behind your back, but I had to go," he starts, and it feels like the beginning of the heated argument that you were so desperately hoping to avoid.
Your cool facade broken, you whirl round to face him straight on, built-up ire finally pouring out of you in reams.
"No, you didn't have to go! You went because you wanted to and you went even though I asked you- no, begged you not to," you yell at him.
He flinches minutely at the sudden raise in volume, but keeps his own voice calm and steady when he crafts his response.
"You don't understand, this is important," he emphasises. "They cannot find out what we’re doing to fight against them, not when we’re this close to finally having the lives we deserve, that all of us deserve.”
It takes all your strength not to give in to his words and continue the argument with an incredulous scoff.
As if you don’t know all that. As if you didn’t spend your days fighting for Zaun as well.
As if you didn’t fight every second for him.
You shut it down immediately, twisting back round to face the bed.
"I'm not doing this," you say blankly.
"What?" he replies, clearly stunned.
"I'm not arguing with you, Silco. I'm leaving."
It breaks your heart to say it, but in this moment, you see no other way forward. Not if he’s going to keep on like this.
Silco says nothing as you pack away the rest of your belongings into your bag, briefly recalling that you still have a few last bits in the wardrobe. You're almost certain that his anger is charging up in the silence, readying himself to launch into a whole speech about how wrong you are.
But when he does speak again, the sound of his choked-up voice feels like a shot directly to your heart.
"You can't leave."
Your heart sinks into your stomach and everything within you practically screams to cross the room and hug him, but you know that if you even look at him you’ll end up changing your mind. So, you move over to the wardrobe instead and pull open the doors to ensure he’s not in your line of sight.
Silco says your name in that horribly soft timbre he only uses when he’s desperate and even though it pretty much tears you apart to ignore him, you focus on pulling the rest of your clothes from the closet.
He speaks your name again, this time even more desperately and you suddenly find yourself biting back tears.
Fuck, why did he have to come home early? Why couldn't you just have some time to grieve by yourself?
"Silco, it's over," you bite out, just wanting this horrible situation to be done with so you can work on healing.
Finally moving into the room, you hear his footsteps creak on the old wooden floorboards behind you.
You brace yourself for him to take your hand or wrap his arms around you but to your confusion, his footsteps halt in the centre of the room and you hear an unexpected rustling sound instead.
Spinning around, you find Silco holding your backpack upside down in the air, emptying the contents back onto the bed with vigorous shakes. Your belongings drop onto the sheets in a crumpled mess, undoing all your work to get them all into the rucksack.
Silco glares at the bag with tight-lipped hatred, as if it’s the reason you’re leaving, the longer strands of his hair falling down and bouncing with each rough movement of his arms.
You stare at him in disbelief, your jaw slack until you find the words to confront him.
"What the fuck, Silco? Put them back!"
He grips the bag even tighter.
"No."
And just like that, your astonishment slides into anger.
"Silco," you warn, eyes narrowing dangerously. "Put. Them. Back."
"Not if it means you'll stay," he replies obstinately.
He continues to shake the bag but, ever the impatient boy, gets too frustrated and decides to drop the bag onto the bed. Rapidly taking out handfuls of your belongings until the backpack is empty, he then throws it at the wall furthest from you with a grunt.
Silco’s gaze slides to look at you from across the room and you both stare at each other breathlessly, chests borderline heaving.
A clear challenge.
Unfortunately for Silco, you can be stubborn too.
Without another word, you reach into the wardrobe and pull out his backpack, moving over to the other side of the bed to restart your packing.
This time, Silco rushes around the bed to you and tries to grab your hand, but you pull it away, taking a step back.
"Just stop-"
"Please don't leave me," he pleads in the most heartbreaking, riven timbre you’ve ever heard him speak in and your heart wrenches.
He sounds like the little boy you’d met all that time ago in those dark mines, the one who was so desperate to no longer be alone.
"I'll do anything, I can't do this without you," he begs.
"Do what without me?"
"Any of it," he blurts out, running a distressed hand through his hair. "Some days, the only thing that gets me through the day is knowing that you'll be here when I get home."
Your insides jolt at such a vulnerable confession from such a headstrong man, but it’s nothing compared to the feeling you get when he suddenly drops to one knee in front of you, taking one of your hands in both of his.
Heart racing ten to the dozen, you watch in horror as he glances up at you.
He’d better not be doing what you think he’s doing…
"Silco-"
"I love you," he says. "I love you more than anything in the world."
You watch as tears line his lashes and soon find yourself matching.
Fuck, you were expecting yelling and anger, not this.
You’ve never seen him like this before.
"Please," he repeats and it cracks your mask in two.
Your knees give out and you let yourself sink down onto the floor with him.
Silco immediately throws his arms around you, only just stopping you from falling back with how quickly he presses his body against yours, burying his head in the crook of your neck.
On instinct, you wrap your arms around his frame, one hand rubbing his back whilst the other cards through his inky strands as he rocks you gently from side to side.
Little whispers of “Don't go,” and “I need you,” are mumbled into your hair, and you’re almost certain the wetness on your neck is from those tears that had been threatening to break free. You kindly decide not to mention it.
Eventually, you sigh and rest your forehead on his shoulder, squeezing your eyes shut in a pitiful attempt to ease the difficult conversation up ahead.
"Sil, I can't keep doing this."
He sniffles a little and pulls back to look at you but doesn’t let go. (He never lets go.)
"Doing what?" he asks, brows furrowing in that cute little way he does when he’s confused about something.
"Watching you destroy yourself."
"I'm not-"
"You are, Silco, and it's hurting me," you enunciate, holding his cheeks to force his gaze on you. He needs to understand how serious you are about this.
The horrified expression on his face instinctively causes you to brush some of his hair back tenderly while he processes your words.
"I want a better Zaun too, but not at the cost of you sacrificing yourself," you continue, keeping your voice quiet but firm.
He’s clearly overwhelmed, seafoam eyes so wide and trenched in deep-rooted panic. But with a lack of response to distract you, you’re forced to take notice of the pain spreading through your back and legs at the awkward sitting position you’re in.
You shift your body, pulling away from him to situate yourself in a comfier position, but the second you loosen your arms from his thin frame, his hand desperately grip you even tighter, clutching onto you like a child to their mother’s leg.
"No, I-"
"I'm not going anywhere, I just need to move before my legs go numb," you’re quick to reassure him.
At this, Silco relaxes slightly, allowing you to move so your back is resting against the side of the bed. His fingers clasp onto your shirt the entire time and the very second you’re planted in a spot that doesn’t completely ruin your spine, he pulls you against him once more.
"What- What can I do to make you stay?" he says between a harsh swallow.
You sigh, swiping a hand across your face tiredly.
"I need you to stop this ridiculous crusade you're on. Or," you add when he goes to protest, "at the very least, include the rest of us in it."
He bites the inside of his lip and entwines his fingers with yours.
"You can't keep making reckless decisions by yourself, Sil. It affects all of us. Especially me."
Silco keeps quiet for a few moments, so you give him time to think while his thumb rhythmically traces your knuckles back and forth.
This can’t be easy for him. He’s pretty independent by nature (most Undercity kids are), but Silco is especially so when it comes to the fight for Zaun’s freedom.
But if he wants you to stay, you’re going to need some compromise.
"Okay," he eventually says, breaking the silence to gaze at you with muted hope.
You’re not letting him off that easily.
"Okay what?" you say expectantly.
He sighs and suddenly he’s transformed into that petulant little boy again.
"Okay, I'll run things by you and Vander before making any big decisions," Silco heaves, like it physically pains him to say.
"And?" you prompt with a raised eyebrow.
Silco stares at you with a look of disbelief, but his lip is curled in clear disgust.
"There's no way I'm running anything by Benzo," he scoffs. "It'd be more useful talking to a brick wall."
You slap his arm half heartedly and bite back a laugh.
"No! I meant, are you going to stop throwing yourself into stupid situations for no reason?"
"I knew you were still upset about last week," Silco replies, a knowing expression melting across his features.
"Of course I'm upset about it! They almost shot you!" you fire back with indignation.
As if you wouldn’t be horrified at the idea of your boyfriend getting seriously hurt and potentially arrested just for being an idiot.
Silco gently combs his fingers through your hair, eyes tracing your features as that smug little smirk you secretly adore colours his lips.
"The key word in that sentence is almost, my lovely."
The glare you level him with is met by a crooked grin, but it’s soon wiped off his face when you jab his stomach with your elbow, ignoring the “Oof,” in favour of cuddling up to him even closer.
Silco lets out a sigh of relief and rests his head against yours whilst one hand sneaks up behind you to surreptitiously wipe his eyes dry with his sleeve.
You allow yourself to relax for a few quiet moments, slowly calming each other down with soft touches until your breathing syncs up with the boy holding you close to his chest.
Silco soon murmurs into your hair, hand smoothing along your waist.
"So you'll stay?"
"Yes, I'll stay," you reply softly, nestling into the crook of his neck.
It’s seemingly not enough to soothe his nerves because he leans back and tilts your chin up with one finger until you meet his anxious gaze.
"You promise?"
"I promise, Silco."
Relief melts through his whole body, but with it brings a cool wash of physical and emotional exhaustion that you wish you could wipe clean.
"You know you can always talk to me, right?” you tell him gently, pinky finger delicately tracing along one eyebrow until the lines of his face relax. “I know you're always so busy trying to keep us afloat but you don't have to do it all alone. You can tell me when things are bothering you, it doesn’t make you weak or ‘less of a man’."
He gazes at you in profound wonder before lightly cupping one side of your face with his hand.
"I really do love you," he whispers, tenderly tracing one thumb down your cheek.
It feels like the weight of your near-breakup is lifted off your shoulders when you finally say it back.
"I love you too, Sil."
He leans down to kiss your head and you find yourself desperately hoping that he keeps his promise. You never want to have to go through this again.
But for now, graced with another chance to stay with the only person you’ve ever loved, you focus on the present, needing to change the heavy atmosphere stifling the room. Your tone shifts into a light, coy thing that immediately grabs his attention.
"You know, if you hadn't rushed in all guns blazing last night you'd have had the chance to listen to my plan for getting the info we need," you tell him. "Y'know, one that wouldn't get you thrown in Stillwater."
Silco stares at you with a frown and you struggle to keep in the smile that threatens to break.
"What plan?"
"The one where I seduce a poor, unsuspecting enforcer and use a bit of good old-fashioned lip service to get what we need," you say coquettishly, batting your eyelashes at him innocently despite the clear innuendo lacing your words.
Instantly, (brilliantly), his seafoam eyes darken with a delicious combination of jealousy and lust, sending a spark of hot desire through your body.
"Not in a million years," he says gruffly, pulling you even closer to him.
You twirl a playful finger through your hair.
"I don't know, I think it's a great plan if you ask me," you reply with an air of teasing nonchalance.
"I wouldn't let you anywhere near them,” his grip tightens on the fabric by your waist. “You're mine.”
Leaning forward, you whisper in his ear, knowing exactly what it does to him.
"Prove it."
There’s a beat of electrified silence before Silco abruptly stands, pulling you up with him until you’re both on your feet.
He smoothly coils one arm around your waist, the other snaking around the nape of your neck until his lips hover tantalisingly above yours. And just when you think he’s about to finally close the gap, he pauses.
You frown, chest flooding with anxiety that you’ve done something wrong, or he’s changed his mind, or-
Silco removes the hand resting behind your head and before you can voice your concerns, he suddenly grabs the bed sheet, ripping it off the bed in a move that sends the mess of your once-packed belongings tumbling to the floor in a cacophony.
"Silco!" you admonish him, already envisioning the amount of time and effort it would take to pick everything up and put it back in its rightful place.
"What?” he says, like butter wouldn’t melt. “We can put it back in the morning."
Then, he swiftly picks you up and tosses you onto the mattress, making you squeal in surprise.
Silco kneels onto the bed and climbs until his body is hovering over yours, arms caging you in as you heat up, warmth flooding downwards in anticipation.
"Now, I think it's time I make it up to you, sweetheart," he purrs, leaning down to hotly trace your ear with his lips. “I’m going to make sure you never want to leave this bed again.”
- A/N: don’t mind me, just casually obsessed with the idea of silco emptying out your bag to desperately stop you from leaving and then frenziedly trying to propose to you when he doesn’t know to deal with his emotions 💁♀️