"the World Isn't Kind" Ok??? Much More Importantly Are You?????

"the world isn't kind" ok??? Much more importantly are you?????

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More Posts from Wolfspoot and Others

11 months ago

I gotta say, one of the greatest achievements of my 20s was that I learned (mostly) to differentiate between:

"I truly do not want to go" and

"I'm just feeling the Demand Avoidance, and I will like it once I get there."


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1 year ago

Something that I think should be an important part of solarpunk aesthetics is screws.

Look at your smartphone. No screws. You've got to have specialized tools to get inside your phone to repair something. There are certain pieces of tech that are glued in place and glue can't be undone without permanently breaking the bond.

But screws!

You can take apart a broken old radio, repair what's broken, and, if you were careful in taking it apart, you can put it back together and have a fully functioning radio and all you need is a common screwdriver!

It's hard to build screws and other mechanical fasteners because it requires more planning than clamps and glues, but isn't that what solarpunk is all about‽ It's about care and sustainability and and a radio or a computer built carefully with repair in mind is a sustainable computer that stays out of landfills and in use.


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5 months ago
Executive Function is the part of your brain that clicks on when you think "I should do this" and you then do it.

"I should do the dishes" •click, green light, does the dishes•

"I should pick that up and throw it in the bin" •click, green light, goes over, picks it up, throws it in the bin•

"I should take a shower" •click, green light, takes a shower"

When you are suffering from executive dysfunction, that switch doesn't work the same as it does for "normal" people.

"I should do the dishes" •click.... click..... click, click, clickclickclickclickclick.... red light, doesn't walk over and start the tap to do the dishes•

"I should pick that up and throw it in the bin" •click, yellow light, task saved until later, memory purge•

"I really, REALLY have to take a shower!" •click-ck-ck-ck-ck-ck-ck... red light, anxiety• "I HAVE to! I can't be outside if I don't shower!" •click.... red light•

Sometimes, you have to force yourself to overcome it, you have to go in there and manually wrench the entire system into green light.

And people can do this, from outside, it doesn't look like anything.

But you know that time you forced yourself to do something that was so far beyond anything you wanted to do that you were completely mentally drained? (Broke up with someone, confessed to something bad, swallowed pride and asked for help etc)

That can be exactly what a person with executive dysfunction experiences when they force themselves to do the dishes. It isn't always that hard, but it can be.

Like trying to purposefully slam your hand in a door or jump off a legit scary height into water that you can't bring yourself to do.

It's a mental illness that can be just as crippling as a physical disability.

And when people say "get over it", it's not like we've tried.

It's just that, you know.

"Get over it"

•click.... click..... click.... click-ck-ck... .... .... red light.•
This exact system also applies to things you WANT to do. When I finally have free time after work and my brain says, hey! We have some time. Let's play video games.

The input for playing video games tries to trigger over and over and over again. I want to play games. It's low effort. It's fun. I enjoy it. Hell, I know I'll enjoy it when I get started but that "on" switch never triggers and I sit there, blank face, usually staring at my phone. Next thing I know, I've wasted all the time I had free and have to do something else, like make dinner.

This is one of the best explanations of executive dysfunction I've read, as someone who suffers from it. People who don't have it really don't understand how challenging it is to want to do something but then getting roadblocked by your own mind.


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2 weeks ago
There Are Four Types Of Fish Scales!

There are four types of fish scales!

Cycloid scales are thin, overlap, and flexible. They're found on primitive teleosts (like minnows and carp).

Ctenoid scales have small, backwards pointed scales (known as cterns) make the fish more hydrodynamic and faster. They're found on Advanced Ctenoids (like perch and sunfish).

Ganoid scales are thick, diamond-shaped, and mostly non-overlapping. They're found on Chondrostei (like sturgeons and paddlefish).

Placoid scales are spikey and tooth-like with nerves. These are found on Chondrichthyes (like sharks and rays).

Ichthyology Notes 3/?


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11 months ago

On of the less intuitive things about love, I've found, of any kind, is the importance of needing things.

I didn't realize it until recently, but I've always seen love as something requiring sacrifice, selflessness, patience, and generosity- to ask for nothing is to be the best person I can be, small and quiet and never in the way, always happy and helpful, self-sufficient and present when desired.

It's only as an adult, now, that I'm beginning to see the selfishness of wanting nothing.

I cut my friend's hair in my kitchen the other day. They wanted a trim and I had the skills, so I offered, and was genuinely excited when they stopped hesitating over "bothering me" and took me up on it. It was a peaceful afternoon, and we had tea and chatted for an hour or more.

My brother and I shared popcorn at the movies a while ago. When I came time to pay, I pulled my card out like a wild western sheriff and slapped it on the machine before he could fight me for it first. The satisfaction was delightful.

Someone called me crying on the phone the other day. Kept apologizing for disturbing me at work, talking about how they were bothering me on my lunch break. I was telling the truth when I told them that really, I was flattered and honored and relieved, knowing that if they were hurting I would know, that I didn't have to worry in silence. It felt good to hear them slowly come down, and to know that they knew it would be better soon, and to hear them laugh wetly on the other end. We're getting together for a visit next week.

It's hard to need things, if you've trained yourself not to. It's hard to want things, when you don't know how to want anymore. Trusting people is difficult, and so is relying on them, but I don't know where I'd be without the people who rely on me.

I've heard a lot of people say, "Nobody will love you unless you love yourself". I've had a lot of thoughts about it. It's not right, but it's not wrong, either, I think.

"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... I've always taken that to mean, "You will not be lovable until you develop a positive view of yourself as a person".

Now, I think it's sort of inside-out.

"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... because nobody can show their love to you in a way that you can accept until you treat yourself kindly, and learn what you need, and what you want, and how to ask for it, and then give that vulnerability away.

Love, for me, is someone I ask for a ride to the airport. Whether they end up doing this or not is irrelevant.

It's not needy, or selfish, or taking up energy. It's giving the gift of being wanted, and needed, and thought of. It's giving someone the security of being part of someone's life.


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2 months ago

everyone’s debating posts of the decade, best and worst, and i have yet to see anyone mention moon moon


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1 year ago
image

Surprisingly, this is not a Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy reference, but an actual fact. From Burnout: Solve Your Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski


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3 weeks ago

25 ways to be a little more punk in 2025

Cut fast fashion - buy used, learn to mend and/or make your own clothes, buy fewer clothes less often so you can save up for ethically made quality

Cancel subscriptions - relearn how to pirate media, spend $10/month buying a digital album from a small artist instead of on Spotify, stream on free services since the paid ones make you watch ads anyway

Green your community - there's lots of ways to do this, like seedbombing or joining a community garden or organizing neighborhood trash pickups

Be kind - stop to give directions, check on stopped cars, smile at kids, let people cut you in line, offer to get stuff off the high shelf, hold the door, ask people if they're okay

Intervene - learn bystander intervention techniques and be prepared to use them, even if it feels awkward

Get closer to your food - grow it yourself, can and preserve it, buy from a farmstand, learn where it's from, go fishing, make it from scratch, learn a new ingredient

Use opensource software - try LibreOffice, try Reaper, learn Linux, use a free Photoshop clone. The next time an app tries to force you to pay, look to see if there's an opensource alternative

Make less trash - start a compost, be mindful of packaging, find another use for that plastic, make it a challenge for yourself!

Get involved in local politics - show up at meetings for city council, the zoning commission, the park district, school boards; fight the NIMBYs that always show up and force them to focus on the things impacting the most vulnerable folks in your community

DIY > fashion - shake off the obsession with pristine presentation that you've been taught! Cut your own hair, use homemade cosmetics, exchange mani/pedis with friends, make your own jewelry, duct tape those broken headphones!

Ditch Google - Chromium browsers (which is almost all of them) are now bloated spyware, and Google search sucks now, so why not finally make the jump to Firefox and another search like DuckDuckGo? Or put the Wikipedia app on your phone and look things up there?

Forage - learn about local edible plants and how to safely and sustainably harvest them or go find fruit trees and such accessible to the public.

Volunteer - every week tutoring at the library or once a month at the humane society or twice a year serving food at the soup kitchen, you can find something that matches your availability

Help your neighbors - which means you have to meet them first and find out how you can help (including your unhoused neighbors), like elderly or disabled folks that might need help with yardwork or who that escape artist dog belongs to or whether the police have been hassling people sleeping rough

Fix stuff - the next time something breaks (a small appliance, an electronic, a piece of furniture, etc.), see if you can figure out what's wrong with it, if there are tutorials on fixing it, or if you can order a replacement part from the manufacturer instead of trashing the whole thing

Mix up your transit - find out what's walkable, try biking instead of driving, try public transit and complain to the city if it sucks, take a train instead of a plane, start a carpool at work

Engage in the arts - go see a local play, check out an art gallery or a small museum, buy art from the farmer's market

Go to the library - to check out a book or a movie or a CD, to use the computers or the printer, to find out if they have other weird rentals like a seed library or luggage, to use meeting space, to file your taxes, to take a class, to ask question

Listen local - see what's happening at local music venues or other events where local musicians will be performing, stop for buskers, find a favorite artist, and support them

Buy local - it's less convenient than online shopping or going to a big box store that sells everything, but try buying what you can from small local shops in your area

Become unmarketable - there are a lot of ways you can disrupt your online marketing surveillance, including buying less, using decoy emails, deleting or removing permissions from apps that spy on you, checking your privacy settings, not clicking advertising links, and...

Use cash - go to the bank and take out cash instead of using your credit card or e-payment for everything! It's better on small businesses and it's untraceable

Give what you can - as capitalism churns on, normal shmucks have less and less, so think about what you can give (time, money, skills, space, stuff) and how it will make the most impact

Talk about wages - with your coworkers, with your friends, while unionizing! Stop thinking about wages as a measure of your worth and talk about whether or not the bosses are paying fairly for the labor they receive

Think about wealthflow - there are a thousand little mechanisms that corporations and billionaires use to capture wealth from the lower class: fees for transactions, interest, vendor platforms, subscriptions, and more. Start thinking about where your money goes, how and where it's getting captured and removed from our class, and where you have the ability to cut off the flow and pass cash directly to your fellow working class people


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11 months ago
When Your Art Program’s Closing Message Hits You Straight In The Heart And Makes You Stop And Contemplate

when your art program’s closing message hits you straight in the heart and makes you stop and contemplate the state of it all


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wolfspoot - Wolfspoot
Wolfspoot

I’m a young-adult woman with the hopes of becoming a well-known writer. I’m a dreamer, a music lover and a chaotic human being, curious about what the future will bring but without any idea of what to do with it. As for this tumblr, we’ll see. I will make an attempt to make an interesting place but for now I still have to figure out what to do with it.

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