How Do Professors Feel When They Make An Exam That Is Too Long?

100th level spells

Abjuration: Protection from physics. You are no longer affected by gravity, inertia, temperature, etc.

Conjuration: Summon literally every demon (10ft radius)

Divination: Detect whether you are actually a fictional construct taking part in a semi-improvised game narrative or not.

Enchantment: Mind control people so effectively that they were already doing the thing you wanted them to do before you mind controlled them. Some might say this is just you taking credit for people doing things they were gonna do anyway, but what do martials know?

Evocation: BLOW UP THE FUCKING SUN.

Illusion: Send yourself into a fully realistic dream world so you never need to bother with existence again. Good luck with the lich army fuckers!

Necromancy: Animate dead but on all the world's fossil fuels.

Transmutation: Transform the entire multiverse into a no-magic high-tech humans-only world where the real world only exists as a reasonably popular tabletop RPG line.

Universal: Maximum counterspell. Cast on a wizard they forget everything after the day they started wizard school, cast on a cleric or warlock it kills their patron, cast on a druid it causes a global mass extinction and cast on a sorcerer to make all their blood fall out.

What if you were leaving someplace after getting in an argument with some guy and while you were leaving he shouted "I fucking hate you and I hope it takes you forever to get home and I hope your car breaks down and when you finally get home I hope there's a bunch of guys there eating your food and trying to fuck your wife" and then it all happened exactly like that

I want you to remember:

The fascists hate you too and they just will pretend otherwise until after they've killed the rest of us, before they turn on you.

11:38 - Arrived at crime scene.

11:38 - Examined body. Signs of a struggle.

11:38 - Found murder weapon in drain.

11:38 - Realised watch was broken.

May all your favorite movies get absolutely horrible sequels

Epic the Musical: Tournament Bracket!

Week 1: Match 8

this should not have gagged me as hard as it did