When your characters are saying no without saying "no"
INARTICULATE
Ah
Oh
APOLOGETIC/UNCOMFORTABLE
Alas ⚜ Can’t help ⚜ Do me a favour ⚜ Give over
I’m afraid… ⚜ Sorry ⚜ Unfortunately
EVASIVE
Any other time… ⚜ Ask Arthur ⚜ ‘Bye ⚜ Must run
Not right now ⚜ Talk to me later ⚜ The thing is… ⚜ What a pity
DEFINITE (with negative word)
No can do ⚜ No chance ⚜ No go ⚜ No way (José)
Never (in a thousand years) ⚜ Not in a million years
Not on your nelly ⚜ I should say not
DEFINITE (no negative word)
Are you serious? ⚜ Drop dead ⚜ Fat chance
Get lost / knotted / stuffed… ⚜ God forbid ⚜ Hard cheese
I’d rather die ⚜ Impossible ⚜ Over my dead body
Push off ⚜ See you in hell first ⚜ Tough titty
Unthinkable ⚜ You must be joking ⚜ You’ve had it
EXCUSES
If it were up to me ⚜ I’m right out ⚜ It’s more than my job’s worth
It’s not in my hands ⚜ Love to, but…
EUPHEMISMS/CLICHÉS
Chance would be a fine thing ⚜ Closed for business
Correspondence closed ⚜ If wish were father to the deed
Je regrette, mais… ⚜ Not my department ⚜ Not my remit
The editor regrets… ⚜ The umpire’s decision is final
Would that it were possible
Parents begin to teach their children to read between the lines in this way at an early age. Here are some of the negative responses used by parents to a request by their 4-year-old for another biscuit.
You’ve just had one ⚜ It’ll be tea time soon
Ask Daddy ⚜ I haven’t heard the magic word yet
Source ⚜ Word Lists ⚜ Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs
Determine the type of signal you need.
Select from that signal group the word which is most appropriate to the meaning of your sentences.
Note: The same transition word or phrase can sometimes serve different purposes.
in addition, furthermore, moreover, also, equally important, likewise, another, again
for example, for instance, thus, in other words, as an illustration, in particular
for this purpose, to this end, with this objective in mind
indeed, truly, again, to repeat, in fact
while it may be true, in spite of this
in summary, in conclusion, therefore, finally, consequently, accordingly, in short, in brief, as a result, on the whole, thus
Value sequence: first, second, secondly, third, thirdly, next, last, finally
Time sequence: then, afterward, next, subsequently, previously, first, second, at last, meanwhile, in the meantime, immediately, soon, at length, yesterday
Space sequence: above, across, under, beyond, below, nearby, nearer, opposite to, adjacent to, to the left/right, in the foreground, in the background
Similarity: similarly, likewise, in like manner
Contrast: in contrast to, however, but, still, nevertheless, yet, conversely, notwithstanding, on the other hand, on the contrary, at the same time, while this may be true
Cause and Effect: consequently, thus, therefore, accordingly, hence, as a result
accordingly, as a result, at the same time, besides, equally important, in fact, otherwise, therefore
also, at the same time, in like manner, in the same way, likewise, similarly, so too
but, however, in contrast with, instead, nevertheless, on the contrary, on the other hand, otherwise, yet
More: Word Lists ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs
glanced
peered
gazed
stared
watched
observed
examined
scrutinized
surveyed
glimpsed
eyed
beheld
inspected
checked
viewed
glanced at
regarded
noticed
gawked
spied
Rain: cleansing, sadness, renewal, obstacles
Sunshine: happiness, hope, clarity, energy
Storms: conflict, turmoil, dramatic change
Snow: purity, stillness, coldness, isolation
Fog: confusion, mystery, uncertainty
Wind: change, freedom, unrest, communication
Eagle: freedom, vision, strength, courage
Lion: bravery, power, leadership, pride
Dove: peace, love, innocence, spirituality
Wolf: loyalty, cunning, survival, community
Snake: transformation, danger, temptation, wisdom
Butterfly: transformation, beauty, impermanence
Rose: love, beauty, passion, secrecy
Oak Tree: strength, endurance, wisdom
Willow Tree: sadness, flexibility, resilience
Lotus Flower: purity, enlightenment, rebirth
Ivy: friendship, fidelity, eternity
Cactus: endurance, protection, warmth
Mirror: self-reflection, truth, illusion
Key: opportunity, secrets, freedom
Bridge: connection, transition, overcoming obstacles
Candle: hope, spirituality, life, guidance
Clock: time, mortality, urgency
Mask: disguise, deception, concealment
One: beginnings, unity, individuality
Two: partnership, balance, duality
Three: creativity, growth, completeness
Four: stability, order, foundation
Five: change, adventure, unpredictability
Seven: mystery, spirituality, luck
Spring: renewal, birth, growth, hope
Summer: vitality, abundance, joy, freedom
Autumn: change, maturity, decline, reflection
Winter: death, stillness, introspection, endurance
Light: knowledge, purity, safety, enlightenment
Darkness: ignorance, evil, mystery, fear
Shadow: the unconscious, secrets, mystery
Twilight: ambiguity, transition, mystery
Fire: passion, destruction, energy, transformation
Water: emotion, intuition, life, change
Earth: stability, grounding, fertility, growth
Air: intellect, communication, freedom, change
Edit: Some posts may be deleted
Character Arcs
Making Character Profiles
Character Development
Comic Relief Arc
Internal Conflict
Character Voices
Creating Distinct Characters
Creating Likeable Characters
Writing Strong Female Characters
Writing POC Characters
Building Tension
Writing Grumpy x Sunshine Tropes
Writing Sexuality & Gender
Writing Manipulative Characters
Intrigue in Storytelling
Enemies to Lovers
Alternatives to Killing Characters
Worldbuilding
Misdirection
Things to Consider Before Killing Characters
Foreshadowing
Emphasising the Stakes
Avoid Info-Dumping
Writing Without Dialogue
1st vs. 2nd vs. 3rd Perspective
Fight Scenes (+ More)
Transitions
Pacing
Writing Prologues
Dialogue Tips
Writing War
Writing Cheating
Writing Miscommunication
Writing Unrequited Love
Writing a Slow Burn Btwn Introverts
Writing Smut
Writing Admiration Without Attraction
Worldbuilding: Questions to Consider
Creating Laws/Rules in Fantasy Worlds
Connected vs. Stand-Alone Series
A & B Stories
Writing YouTube Channels, Podcasts, & Blogs
Online Writing Resources
Outlining/Writing/Editing Software
Translation Software for Writing
Losing Passion/Burnout
Overcoming Writer's Block
How To Name Fantasy Races (Step-by-Step)
Naming Elemental Races
Naming Fire-Related Races
How To Name Fantasy Places
Character Ask Game #1
Character Ask Game #2
Character Ask Game #3
Writing Tips
Writing Fantasy
Miscommunication Prompts
Variety in Sentence Structure (avoiding repetition)
"Show, don’t tell" means letting readers experience a story through actions, senses, and dialogue instead of outright explaining things. Here are some practical tips to achieve that:
Tell: "The room was cold."
Show: "Her breath puffed in faint clouds, and she shivered as frost clung to the edges of the window."
Tell: "He was scared."
Show: "His hands trembled, and his heart thudded so loudly he was sure they could hear it too."
Tell: "She was angry."
Show: "She slammed the mug onto the counter, coffee sloshing over the rim as her jaw clenched."
Tell: "He was exhausted."
Show: "He stumbled through the door, collapsing onto the couch without even bothering to remove his shoes."
What characters say and how they say it can reveal their emotions, intentions, or traits.
Tell: "She was worried about the storm."
Show: "Do you think it'll reach us?" she asked, her voice tight, her fingers twisting the hem of her shirt.
Tell: "He was jealous of his friend."
Show: "As his friend held up the trophy, he forced a smile, swallowing the bitter lump rising in his throat."
Use the setting to mirror or hint at emotions or themes.
Tell: "The town was eerie."
Show: "Empty streets stretched into the mist, and the only sound was the faint creak of a weathered sign swinging in the wind."
Give enough clues for the reader to piece things together without spelling it out.
Tell: "The man was a thief."
Show: "He moved through the crowd, fingers brushing pockets, his hand darting away with a glint of gold."
What’s left unsaid can reveal as much as what’s spoken.
Tell: "They were uncomfortable around each other."
Show: "He avoided her eyes, pretending to study the painting on the wall. She smoothed her dress for the third time, her fingers fumbling with the hem."
Use metaphors, similes, or comparisons to make an emotion or situation vivid.
Tell: "The mountain was huge."
Show: "The mountain loomed above them, its peak disappearing into the clouds, as if it pierced the heavens."
Tell: "The village had been destroyed by the fire."
Show: "Charred beams jutted from the rubble like broken ribs, the acrid smell of ash lingering in the air. A child's shoe lay half-buried in the soot, its leather curled from the heat."
While lethal injuries often take center stage, non-lethal injuries can create lasting effects on characters, shaping their journeys in unique ways. If you need a simple way to make your characters feel pain during a scene, here are some ideas:
Sprained Ankle
A common injury that can severely limit mobility, forcing characters to adapt their plans and experience frustration as they navigate their environment.
Rib Contusion
A painful bruise on the ribs can make breathing difficult and create tension, especially during action scenes, where every breath becomes a reminder of vulnerability.
Concussion
This brain injury can lead to confusion, dizziness, and mood swings, affecting a character’s judgment and creating a sense of unpredictability in their actions.
Fractured Finger
A broken finger can complicate tasks that require fine motor skills, causing frustration and emphasizing a character’s dependence on their hands.
Road Rash
The raw, painful skin resulting from a fall can symbolize struggle and endurance, highlighting a character's resilience in the face of physical hardship.
Shoulder Dislocation
This injury can be excruciating and often leads to an inability to use one arm, forcing characters to confront their limitations while adding urgency to their situation.
Deep Laceration
A cut that requires stitches can evoke visceral imagery and tension, especially if the character has to navigate their surroundings while in pain.
Burns
Whether from fire, chemicals, or hot surfaces, burns can cause intense suffering and lingering trauma, serving as a physical reminder of a character’s past mistakes or battles.
Pulled Muscle
This can create ongoing pain and restrict movement, providing an opportunity for characters to experience frustration or the need to lean on others for support.
Tendonitis
Inflammation of a tendon can cause chronic pain and limit a character's ability to perform tasks they usually take for granted, highlighting their struggle to adapt and overcome.
Check out the rest of Quillology with Haya; a blog dedicated to writing and publishing tips for authors! Instagram Tiktok
Gets into: A Fight ⚜ ...Another Fight ⚜ ...Yet Another Fight
Hates Someone ⚜ Kisses Someone ⚜ Falls in Love
Calls Someone they Love ⚜ Dies / Cheats Death ⚜ Drowns
is...
A Ballerina ⚜ A Child ⚜ Interacting with a Child ⚜ A Cheerleader
A Cowboy ⚜ A Genius ⚜ A Lawyer ⚜ A Pirate ⚜ A Spy
A Wheelchair User ⚜ A Zombie ⚜ Beautiful ⚜ Dangerous ⚜ Drunk
Funny ⚜ In a Coma ⚜ In a Secret Society ⚜ Injured ⚜ Shy
needs...
A Magical Item ⚜ An Aphrodisiac ⚜ A Fictional Poison
A Coping Strategy ⚜ A Drink ⚜ A Medicinal Herb ⚜ A Mentor
Money ⚜ A Persuasion Tactic ⚜ A Quirk ⚜ To be Killed Off
To Become Likable ⚜ To Clean a Wound ⚜ To Self-Reflect
To Find the Right Word, but Can't ⚜ To Say No ⚜ To Swear
loves...
Astronomy ⚜ Baking ⚜ Cooking ⚜ Cocktails ⚜ Food ⚜ Oils
Dancing ⚜ Fashion ⚜ Gems ⚜ Herbal Remedies ⚜ Honey
Mushrooms ⚜ Mythology ⚜ Numbers ⚜ Perfumes
Roses ⚜ Sweets ⚜ To Argue ⚜ To Insult ⚜ To Kiss
To Make False Claims ⚜ Wine ⚜ Wine-Tasting ⚜ Yoga
has/experiences...
Allergies ⚜ Amnesia ⚜ Bereavement ⚜ Bites & Stings
Bruises ⚜ Caffeine ⚜ CO Poisoning ⚜ Color Blindness
Facial Hair ⚜ Fainting ⚜ Fevers ⚜ Food Allergies
Food Poisoning ⚜ Fractures ⚜ Frostbite ⚜ Hypothermia
Injuries ⚜ Jet Lag ⚜ Kidnapping ⚜ Manipulation ⚜ Mutism
Pain ⚜ Paranoia ⚜ Poisoning ⚜ More Pain & Violence
Scars ⚜ Trauma ⚜ Viruses ⚜ Wounds
[these are just quick references. more research may be needed to write your story...]
Writing Resources PDFs
Eyes wide with pupils dilated.
Hands trembling uncontrollably.
Heart pounding audibly in the chest.
Backing away slowly, seeking escape.
Holding breath or breathing shallowly.
Breaking out in a cold sweat.
Startling at the slightest sound.
Whispering or speaking in a hushed tone.
Looking over their shoulder repeatedly.
Clutching at clothing or objects for reassurance.
Voice quivering or stammering.
Legs feeling weak or buckling.
Feeling a chill run down the spine.
Hugging oneself protectively.
Trying to make themselves smaller.
Furtive glances around the room.
Feeling light-headed or dizzy.
Stiffening up and freezing in place.
Swallowing hard, throat dry.
Eyes darting around, unable to focus.
by Writerthreads on Instagram
A common problem writers face is "white room syndrome"—when scenes feel like they’re happening in an empty white room. To avoid this, it's important to describe settings in a way that makes them feel real and alive, without overloading readers with too much detail. Here are a few tips below to help!
You don’t need to describe everything in the scene—just pick a couple of specific, memorable details to bring the setting to life. Maybe it’s the creaky floorboards in an old house, the musty smell of a forgotten attic, or the soft hum of a refrigerator in a small kitchen. These little details help anchor the scene and give readers something to picture, without dragging the action with heaps of descriptions.
Instead of just focusing on what characters can see, try to incorporate all five senses—what do they hear, smell, feel, or even taste? Describe the smell of fresh bread from a nearby bakery, or the damp chill of a foggy morning. This adds a lot of depth and make the location feel more real and imaginable.
Have characters interact with the environment. How do your characters move through the space? Are they brushing their hands over a dusty bookshelf, shuffling through fallen leaves, or squeezing through a crowded subway car? Instead of dumping a paragraph of description, mix it in with the action or dialogue.
Sometimes, the setting can do more than just provide a backdrop—it can reinforce the mood of a scene or even reflect a theme in the story. A stormy night might enhance tension, while a warm, sunny day might highlight a moment of peace. The environment can add an extra layer to what’s happening symbolically.
The bookstore was tucked between two brick buildings, its faded sign creaking with every gust of wind. Inside, the air was thick with the scent of worn paper and dust, mingling with the faint aroma of freshly brewed coffee from a corner café down the street. The wooden floorboards groaned as Ella wandered between the shelves, her fingertips brushing the spines of forgotten novels. Somewhere in the back, the soft sound of jazz crackled from an ancient radio.
Hope these tips help in your writing!
Furrowing brows deeply.
Tilting head to one side.
Eyes squinting as if trying to see something clearly.
Biting the inner cheek in thought.
Scratching or rubbing the back of the head.
Asking, “What do you mean?” repeatedly.
Frowning and pursing lips.
Looking around as if searching for clues.
Running fingers through hair in frustration.
Sighing and shaking head slowly.
Muttering under breath, trying to make sense of things.
Rubbing temples as if to ward off a headache.
Staring blankly into space.
Crossing and uncrossing arms, unsure of what to do.
Shuffling feet awkwardly.
Pulling at their collar or fidgeting with clothing.
Glancing at others for confirmation or help.
Blinking rapidly, trying to process information.
Clenching and unclenching fists.
Taking a deep breath and slowly exhaling.
Eyes sparkling with anticipation.
Bouncing on the balls of their feet.
Clapping hands together in delight.
Speaking in a high-pitched, rapid tone.
Grinning from ear to ear.
Jumping up and down with joy.
Hugging others spontaneously.
Cheeks flushed with enthusiasm.
Widening eyes and raised eyebrows.
Waving hands animatedly while talking.
Giggling or laughing uncontrollably.
Unable to sit still, shifting in their seat.
Heart racing with exhilaration.
Feet tapping or legs jiggling.
Practically vibrating with energy.
Exclaiming, "I can't believe it!" repeatedly.
Reaching out to touch or grab someone’s hand.
Dancing or spinning around.
Clutching their chest as if to contain the excitement.
Practicing or rehearsing what they’ll say or do.
(from a writer of ten years)
So you’re back in the writing trenches. You’re staring at your computer, or your phone, or your tablet, or your journal, and trying not to lose your mind. Because what comes after the first quotation mark? Nothing feels good.
Don’t worry, friend. I’m your friendly tumblr writing guide and I’m here to help you climb out of the pit of writing despair.
I’ve created a character specifically for this exercise. His name is Amos Alejandro III, but for now we’ll just call him Amos. He’s a thirty-something construction worker with a cat who hates him, and he’s just found out he has to go on a quest across the world to save his mother’s diner.
One of the biggest struggles writers face when writing dialogue is keeping characters’ dialogue “in-character”.
You’re probably thinking, “but Sparrow, I’m the creator! None of the dialogue I write can be out of character because they’re my original characters!”
WRONG. (I’m hitting the very loud ‘incorrect’ buzzer in your head right now).
Yes, you created your characters. But you created them with specific characteristics and attitudes. For example, Amos lives alone, doesn’t enjoy talking too much, and isn’t a very scholarly person. So he’s probably not going to say something like “I suggest that we pursue the path of least resistance for this upcoming quest.” He’d most likely say, “I mean, I think the easiest route is pretty self-explanatory.”
Another example is a six-year-old girl saying, “Hi, Mr. Ice Cream Man, do you have chocolate sundaes?” instead of “Hewwo, Ice Cweam Man— Chocowate Sundaes?”
Please don’t put ‘w’s in the middle of your dialogue unless you have a very good and very specific reason. I will cry.
Yes, the girl is young, but she’s not going to talk like that. Most children know how to ask questions correctly, and the ‘w’ sound, while sometimes found in a young child’s speech, does not need to be written out. Children are human.
So, consider the attitude, characteristics, and age of your character when writing dialogue!
If I’m reading a novel and I see an entire page of dialogue without any breaks, I’m sobbing. You’re not a 17th century author with endless punctuation. You’re in the 21st century and people don’t read in the same way they used to.
Break up your dialogue. Use long sentences. Use one word. Use commas, use paragraph breaks. Show a character throwing a chair out a window in between sentences.
For example:
“So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret receipt card, and bring it back before she goes out of business? She didn’t have any other copies? Do I have to leave my cat behind?”
vs.
Amos ran a hand over his face. “So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret recipe card, and bring it back before she goes out of business?”
He couldn’t believe his luck. That was sarcastic, of course. This was ironically horrible.
“She didn’t have any other copies?” He leaned forward over the table and frowned. “Do I have to leave my cat behind?”
The second version is easier to digest, and I got to add some fun description of thought and action into the scene! Readers get a taste of Amos’ character in the second scene, whereas in the first scene they only got what felt like a million words of dialogue.
DON’T OVERUSE DIALOGUE TAGS. DON’T. DON’T DON’T DON’T.
If you don’t know what a dialogue tag is, it’s a word after a sentence of dialogue that attributes that dialogue to a specific character.
For example:
“Orange juice and chicken ramen are good,” he said.
‘Said’ functions as the dialogue tag in this sentence.
Dialogue tags are good. You don’t want to completely avoid them. (I used to pride myself on how I could write stories without any dialogue tags. Don’t do that.) Readers need to know who’s speaking. But overusing them, or overusing weird or unique tags, should be avoided.
Examples:
“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said.
“Why?” Amos growled. “It’s been in the family forever.”
“I’ve lost the secret recipe card, and I can’t keep the diner open without it!” She cried.
“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?” Amos questioned.
“Yes!” Amos’ mother screamed.
“Well, that’s not good,” Amos complained.
vs.
“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said, taking her son’s hand and leading him over to one of the old, grease-stained tabletops with the ripped-fabric booths.
Amos simply stared at her, frozen in place. “Why? It’s been in the family forever.”
“I’ve—” she looked away for a moment, then took in a breath. “I’ve lost the secret recipe card. And I can’t keep the diner open without it.”
“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?”
“Yes!” She still wouldn’t meet his eyes, and her shoulders were shaking. “Yes.”
Amos sat down heavily in the booth. “Well, that’s not good.”
The first scene only gives character names and dialogue tags. There are no actions and no descriptions. The second scene, however, gives these things. They give the reader descriptions of the diner, the characters’ actions, and attitudes. Overusing dialogue tags gets boring fast, so add interest into your writing!
So! When you’re writing, consider the attitude of your character, vary dialogue length, and don’t overuse dialogue tags.
Now climb out of the pit of writing despair. Pick up your pen or computer. And write some good dialogue!
Best,
Sparrow
more words for your fight scenes (pt. 3)
ado, altercation, argument, battle, bicker, cause célèbre, conflict, confrontation, contend, contest, contradiction, controversy, demur, dicker, difference, disagree, dispute, dissent, divide, double standard, expostulate, falling out, fight, friction, haggle, hue and cry, imbroglio, misunderstanding, object, protest, quibble, rebut, rift, row, run-in, sass, squabble, tiff, vendetta, wrangle
blackmail, damage(s), dressing-down, fine, lesson, rap, reproach, sanction, whipping
chase, dragnet, hound, shadow, tag, trace, track/track down, trail
claw, lacerate, snag, tear
bite, burnish, creak, erase, file, friction, glaze, grate, polish, smear
comb, dig, explore, forage, grope, hunt, investigation, nose, plumb, prospect, quest, ransack, rummage, scout, snoop, track/track down
choke, clinch, constriction, crush, enfold, pinch, pulp, rumple, squash
claw, gore, impale, lacerate, perforate, prick, puncture, spike, stick, tap, transfix
buck, chuck, dash, disseminate, eject, extrude, fling, heave, intersperse, launch, lob, pelt, powder, propagate, scatter, sling, splatter, toss
collide, crash, dash
arson, conflagration, flame, glow, incinerate, kindle, light, scorch, singe, smolder
abrasion, affliction, blister, boo boo, concussion, corrosion, damage, detriment, disadvantage, fracture, harm, inflammation, laceration, prick, rip, rust, shock, swelling, wound
abort, curtains, decease, die, end, expire, mortician, pass away, perish, undertaker
boneyard, crypt, graveyard, monument, tomb
NOTE
The above are concepts classified according to subject and usage. It not only helps writers and thinkers to organize their ideas but leads them from those very ideas to the words that can best express them.
It was, in part, created to turn an idea into a specific word. By linking together the main entries that share similar concepts, the index makes possible creative semantic connections between words in our language, stimulating thought and broadening vocabulary. Writing Resources PDFs
Source ⚜ Writing Basics & Refreshers ⚜ On Vocabulary ⚜ Part 1 ⚜ Part 2 Writing Notes: Fight Scenes ⚜ Word Lists: Fight ⚜ Pain
Just a few suggestions. You shouldn’t have to compromise your writing style and voice with any of these, and some situations and scenes might demand some stiff or jerky writing to better convey emotion and immersion. I am not the first to come up with these, just circulating them again.
This is an example paragraph. You might see this generated from AI. I can’t help but read this in a robotic voice. It’s very flat and undynamic. No matter what the words are, it will be boring. It’s boring because you don’t think in stiff sentences. Comedians don’t tell jokes in stiff sentences. We don’t tell campfire stories in stiff sentences. These often lack flow between points, too.
So funnily enough, I had to sit through 87k words of a “romance” written just like this. It was stiff, janky, and very unpoetic. Which is fine, the author didn’t tell me it was erotica. It just felt like an old lady narrator, like Old Rose from Titanic telling the audience decades after the fact instead of living it right in the moment. It was in first person pov, too, which just made it worse. To be able to write something so explicit and yet so un-titillating was a talent. Like, beginner fanfic smut writers at least do it with enthusiasm.
You got three options, pre-, mid-, and post-tags.
Leader said, “this is a pre-dialogue tag.”
“This,” Lancer said, “is a mid-dialogue tag.”
“This is a post-dialogue tag,” Heart said.
Pre and Post have about the same effect but mid-tags do a lot of heavy lifting.
They help break up long paragraphs of dialogue that are jank to look at
They give you pauses for ~dramatic effect~
They prompt you to provide some other action, introspection, or scene descriptor with the tag. *don't forget that if you're continuing the sentence as if the tag wasn't there, not to capitalize the first word after the tag. Capitalize if the tag breaks up two complete sentences, not if it interrupts a single sentence.
It also looks better along the lefthand margin when you don’t start every paragraph with either the same character name, the same pronouns, or the same “ as it reads more natural and organic.
General rule of thumb is that action scenes demand quick exchanges, short paragraphs, and very lean descriptors. Action scenes are where you put your juicy verbs to use and cut as many adverbs as you can. But regardless of if you’re in first person, second person, or third person limited, you can let the mood of the narrator bleed out into their narration.
Like, in horror, you can use a lot of onomatopoeia.
Drip Drip Drip
Or let the narration become jerky and unfocused and less strict in punctuation and maybe even a couple run-on sentences as your character struggles to think or catch their breath and is getting very overwhelmed.
You can toss out some grammar rules, too and get more poetic.
Warm breath tickles the back of her neck. It rattles, a quiet, soggy, rasp. She shivers. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. Sweat beads at her temple. Her heart thunders in her chest. Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba- It moves on, leaving a void of cold behind. She uncurls her fists, fingers achy and palms stinging from her nails. It’s gone.
The amount of times I have been faced with giant blocks of dialogue with zero tags, zero emotions, just speech on a page like they’re notecards to be read on a stage is higher than I expected. Don’t forget that though you may know exactly how your dialogue sounds in your head, your readers don’t. They need dialogue tags to pick up on things like tone, specifically for sarcasm and sincerity, whether a character is joking or hurt or happy.
If you’ve written a block of text (usually exposition or backstory stuff) that’s longer than 50 words, figure out a way to trim it. No matter what, break it up into multiple sections and fill in those breaks with important narrative that reflects the narrator’s feelings on what they’re saying and whoever they’re speaking to’s reaction to the words being said. Otherwise it’s meaningless.
—
Hope this helps anyone struggling! Now get writing.
Sticking a landing will royally fuck up your joints and possibly shatter your ankles, depending on how high you’re jumping/falling from. There’s a very good reason free-runners dive and roll.
Hand-to-hand fights usually only last a matter of seconds, sometimes a few minutes. It’s exhausting work and unless you have a lot of training and history with hand-to-hand combat, you’re going to tire out really fast.
Arrows are very effective and you can’t just yank them out without doing a lot of damage. Most of the time the head of the arrow will break off inside the body if you try pulling it out, and arrows are built to pierce deep. An arrow wound demands medical attention.
Throwing your opponent across the room is really not all that smart. You’re giving them the chance to get up and run away. Unless you’re trying to put distance between you so you can shoot them or something, don’t throw them.
Everyone has something called a “flinch response” when they fight. This is pretty much the brain’s way of telling you “get the fuck out of here or we’re gonna die.” Experienced fighters have trained to suppress this. Think about how long your character has been fighting. A character in a fist fight for the first time is going to take a few hits before their survival instinct kicks in and they start hitting back. A character in a fist fight for the eighth time that week is going to respond a little differently.
ADRENALINE WORKS AGAINST YOU WHEN YOU FIGHT. THIS IS IMPORTANT. A lot of times people think that adrenaline will kick in and give you some badass fighting skills, but it’s actually the opposite. Adrenaline is what tires you out in a battle and it also affects the fighter’s efficacy - meaning it makes them shaky and inaccurate, and overall they lose about 60% of their fighting skill because their brain is focusing on not dying. Adrenaline keeps you alive, it doesn’t give you the skill to pull off a perfect roundhouse kick to the opponent’s face.
Swords WILL bend or break if you hit something hard enough. They also dull easily and take a lot of maintenance. In reality, someone who fights with a sword would have to have to repair or replace it constantly.
Fights get messy. There’s blood and sweat everywhere, and that will make it hard to hold your weapon or get a good grip on someone.
A serious battle also smells horrible. There’s lots of sweat, but also the smell of urine and feces. After someone dies, their bowels and bladder empty. There might also be some questionable things on the ground which can be very psychologically traumatizing. Remember to think about all of the character’s senses when they’re in a fight. Everything WILL affect them in some way.
If your sword is sharpened down to a fine edge, the rest of the blade can’t go through the cut you make. You’ll just end up putting a tiny, shallow scratch in the surface of whatever you strike, and you could probably break your sword.
ARCHERS ARE STRONG TOO. Have you ever drawn a bow? It takes a lot of strength, especially when you’re shooting a bow with a higher draw weight. Draw weight basically means “the amount of force you have to use to pull this sucker back enough to fire it.” To give you an idea of how that works, here’s a helpful link to tell you about finding bow sizes and draw weights for your characters. (CLICK ME)
If an archer has to use a bow they’re not used to, it will probably throw them off a little until they’ve done a few practice shots with it and figured out its draw weight and stability.
People bleed. If they get punched in the face, they’ll probably get a bloody nose. If they get stabbed or cut somehow, they’ll bleed accordingly. And if they’ve been fighting for a while, they’ve got a LOT of blood rushing around to provide them with oxygen. They’re going to bleed a lot.
Here’s a link to a chart to show you how much blood a person can lose without dying. (CLICK ME)
If you want a more in-depth medical chart, try this one. (CLICK ME)
Hopefully this helps someone out there. If you reblog, feel free to add more tips for writers or correct anything I’ve gotten wrong here.
first thing you might want to consider: is the pain mental or physical?
if it’s physical, what type of pain is it causing? — sharp pain, white-hot pain, acute pain, dull ache, throbbing pain, chronic pain, neuropathic pain (typically caused by nerve damage), etc
if it’s mental, what is the reason your character is in pain? — grief, heartbreak, betrayal, anger, hopelessness, fear and anxiety, etc
because your character will react differently to different types of pain
sharp and white-hot pain may cause a character to grit their teeth, scream, moan, twist their body. their skin may appear pale, eyes red-rimmed and sunken with layers of sweat covering their forehead. they may have tears in their eyes (and the tears may feel hot), but they don’t necessarily have to always be crying.
acute pain may be similar to sharp and white-hot pain; acute pain is sudden and urgent and often comes without a warning, so your character may experience a hitched breathing where they suddenly stop what they’re doing and clench their hand at the spot where it hurts with widened eyes and open mouth (like they’re gasping for air).
dull ache and throbbing pain can result in your character wanting to lay down and close their eyes. if it’s a headache, they may ask for the lights to be turned off and they may be less responsive, in the sense that they’d rather not engage in any activity or conversation and they’d rather be left alone. they may make a soft whimper from their throat from time to time, depends on their personality (if they don’t mind others seeing their discomfort, they may whimper. but if your character doesn’t like anyone seeing them in a not-so-strong state, chances are they won’t make any sound, they might even pretend like they’re fine by continuing with their normal routine, and they may or may not end up throwing up or fainting).
if your character experience chronic pain, their pain will not go away (unlike any other illnesses or injuries where the pain stops after the person is healed) so they can feel all these types of sharp pain shooting through their body. there can also be soreness and stiffness around some specific spots, and it will affect their life. so your character will be lucky if they have caretakers in their life. but are they stubborn? do they accept help from others or do they like to pretend like they’re fine in front of everybody until their body can’t take it anymore and so they can no longer pretend?
neuropathic pain or nerve pain will have your character feeling these senses of burning, shooting and stabbing sensation, and the pain can come very suddenly and without any warning — think of it as an electric shock that causes through your character’s body all of a sudden. your character may yelp or gasp in shock, how they react may vary depends on the severity of the pain and how long it lasts.
grief can make your character shut themself off from their friends and the world in general. or they can also lash out at anyone who tries to comfort them. (five states of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and eventual acceptance.)
heartbreak — your character might want to lock themself in a room, anywhere where they are unseen. or they may want to pretend that everything’s fine, that they’re not hurt. until they break down.
betrayal can leave a character with confusion, the feelings of ‘what went wrong?’, so it’s understandable if your character blames themself at first, that maybe it’s their fault because they’ve somehow done something wrong somewhere that caused the other character to betray them. what comes after confusion may be anger. your character can be angry at the person who betrayed them and at themself, after they think they’ve done something wrong that resulted in them being betrayed, they may also be angry at themself next for ‘falling’ for the lies and for ‘being fooled’. so yes, betrayal can leave your character with the hatred that’s directed towards the character who betrayed them and themself. whether or not your character can ‘move on and forgive’ is up to you.
there are several ways a character can react to anger; they can simply lash out, break things, scream and yell, or they can also go complete silent. no shouting, no thrashing the place. they can sit alone in silence and they may cry. anger does make people cry. it mostly won’t be anything like ‘ugly sobbing’ but your character’s eyes can be bloodshot, red-rimmed and there will be tears, only that there won’t be any sobbing in most cases.
hopelessness can be a very valid reason for it, if you want your character to do something reckless or stupid. most people will do anything if they’re desperate enough. so if you want your character to run into a burning building, jump in front of a bullet, or confess their love to their archenemy in front of all their friends, hopelessness is always a valid reason. there’s no ‘out of character’ if they are hopeless and are desperate enough.
fear and anxiety. your character may be trembling, their hands may be shaky. they may lose their appetite. they may be sweaty and/or bouncing their feet. they may have a panic attack if it’s severe enough.
and I think that’s it for now! feel free to add anything I may have forgotten to mention here!
“Nope,” I whisper as I exit out of a fic with no paragraph breaks.