The Words Don't Come Easy Anymore.

“It’s you, and us,” I added, motioning between us. “It’s this thing that never was, but always is, that never will be and will never not be”

Make me hate you

“You are the only one, the only love that I have ever been able to write about.”

— Things I Never Got To Tell You, Part 21 (via venula)

Somewhere, there’s a version of us that survived.

— Clementine Von Radics

I don’t know how I knew, but I did.

I could feel it in my bones. The silence crept in once again, filling the space that contained all my chaos. I haven’t heard a peep since. You know the silence kills me, I’ll lose my mind in the emptiness. But the thing is I didn’t know why the silence took over. I didn’t know why I couldn’t get it back. But then I saw the ring on her finger and it all made sense. . .

When she’s walking down the aisle to you I know I’ll be the furthest from your mind. But there’s a piece of you stuck in my veins. It’s the piece of you I know you’ll never share with her but you were willing to share with me. It’s the only part of me that isn’t dying slowly, knowing there’s still something you’d only be willing to give me.

“Timing is a hell of a thing. In the end, that’s what it all comes down to. The potency of an attraction or the purity of a connection mean very little if you’re on separate journeys. You and I were a perfect fit, we were, there was just too much distance between us to see it.”

- a love letter to whiskey

“part of me is mad that i wrote you into my stories. because i can no longer read them without falling in love, and breaking my heart at the same time. but part of me is so glad i did. because it reminds of how beautiful our love was, even if it destroyed me.”

i still miss you (via baby-imyoursx)

A beautiful boy once told me saying love you is just habit, to say I love you is to mean it, and I’ve never forgotten that …

One day,

That was the name of the movie I watched with my step mother. And as the credits rolled she looked at me and said “you love this movie because you want to live it with him. You want to know that at the end of your time apart living other lives with other people. That one day some how you’ll find your way back to each other, and it’ll be the two of you forever”

I’ve never heard such sadness give me such hope.

when i first met you i thought

“damn that boy puts the sun to shame” I thought that you were this piece that i didnt know i was missing as if my life had been in chaos because you werent in it yet But then it happened.. Moment by moment you began to take pieces of me without me realizing it you took my thoughts, my dreams, and my plans for the future when your shine was no longer blinded me i noticed something was different you told me that you were just fixing the things that you took when you gave them back to me they were no longer the same you gave me back street maps, marked with coffee houses, and vegan restaurants along the roads i would take to the job you picked out for me your sparkle was still in the corner of my eye so i thought that you were helping me, for a while there i thought that i wanted those things. But then the days began to get cloudy, you could never tell me when youd be coming home once i moved across the world to be with you. I was left to my own devices in a room that didnt feel at all like mine. At first i would grab my umbrella and walk to the coffee shop before i headed off to work and at lunch would try out the new vegan place down the street. But after one too many cloudy days i realized that the coffee was burnt and i didnt even like tofu, and my boss was a bitch. So i began to make my own sunshine, and boy did it show the cracks that you left me to mend. you’d come back home occasionally to tell me everything was fine, but i could no longer feel any light radiating from you. you were pale and grey, you were actually pretty cold. You slept so peacefully knowing that you weren’t sure where i was or what i was doing but at some point id sneak into bed and id awake with you gone again. You used your light to blind me, so that while i could not see you created someone else, someone that you wanted me to be and convinced me that I wanted to be her too. But without constant upkeep i began to wipe away parts of the girl that I never was. When i began to show you parts of the person I really was you didn’t like her, you began to call her names and say she wasn’t the person you fell in love with. But i don’t think your feet ever left the ground, you were too busy there planting seeds in my mind to tell me you knew what was best. maybe that was my fault for letting it happen, i was much younger than you and you’d never let me forget that. But now years have past and i don’t even recognize the girl you tried to make me become. I saw you walking down the street and you turned the corner at the sight of me. I heard that you had a new girlfriend, one that you’ve been with before i kicked you out of my bed. It makes me want to say sorry to your ex, you villainized her so much when we were together that i thought she was no good. But i am sure that you tell your new girl that I was just the same, that i didn’t deserve your love because while you were at work i was at a party down the street. I am sure that she doesn’t know you were still with me when you first kissed, or that the sweatpants you wear when your sick were mine. I am sure she thinks I’m horrible, and i will admit at times i was, but you cant expect to cage someone in and not have them fight their way back out. I wonder how long it took her to stop starring into your light, for her to see what your real intentions were. I wonder why your light is so blinding, when behind it there’s just a selfish little boy trying to make himself a puppet.