Iswm X Reader - Blog Posts

HEY GUYS! I'M BACK AND I'M STRONGER THAN EVER! AND GUESS WHAT?? IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! SEND ME SOME REQUESTS :))

(Note: I will not write any smut, since I am not comfortable with writing that type of stuff. No incest, rape, etc will not be written here either. Mentions of it will occur in angst fanfics, drabbles & such if requested.)

Head Engineer Mack x reader - Enough

(Y/n) felt horrible. No matter what or how much she did it wasn’t enough, at least not in his eyes. Mack was cruel, always acting high and mighty, criticizing everyone no matter how they did. She didn’t understand what his problem was. 

(Y/n) knew that the more she tried to prove herself worthy of her title, the more it tolled her body. She was exhausted, mentally and physically, but she just kept working. She needed to or else she would feel lazy and Mack would likely bug her again about “Letting him take control because clearly the job of Captain was too much work for someone like her.”

“I’ll prove him wrong.” She thought, making her way to the control room. With every step she took, her eyelids started to droop and her vision swirled. “I need to.. stay awake.. need to.. I need to be.. worthy of.. Captain…” 

Her foot dragged and caught on an imperfection on the floor, causing (Y/n) to stumble and fall. “I should fix that.” She thought as her head hit the floor and everything went black.

Mack looked around his foot tapping the ground in irritation. “Where is she?” He had called (Y/n) for a status update but she still hadn’t arrived. It had been 10 minutes. “The ship isn’t that big. Maybe she’s sleeping, that lazy girl.”

As he tapped the ping button on his arm tablet, the head nurse for the Medbay walked into the room. “Head Engineer Mack,” she greeted him, “I saw that you were trying to contact the Captain so I came here to-”

“Wait wait,” interrupted Mack with a frown and a raised eyebrow. “How could you see that I was contacting her?” 

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you, sir.” She continued, looking at him worriedly. “She’s in Medbay. I found her passed out in the hallway.” Mack’s eyes widened. Quickly walking past the nurse, he began moving toward the Medbay. He could barely hear and register what the nurse was saying over the pounding of his heart ringing in his ears.

He didn’t know why he was in such a hurry. He and the Captain weren’t really that close, but he still found himself rushing to be at her side. He was worried, but didn’t completely understand why.

When the door to Medbay opened, Mack was met by the sight of (Y/n) lying in a sick bed, the sound of a heart monitor beeping rhythmically in the background. Her helmet was placed in a chair nearby, her head wrapped with a few bandages. She looked so peaceful, like she was just fast asleep.

“Stop it,” Mack thought, mentally slapping himself. “She’s not dead, just unconscious. He turned to the nurse. “How long do you think she’s been out for?”

“Maybe half an hour, sir.” She said pressing a button and bringing up a scan. “She did suffer a good hard blow to the head, likely when she hit the ground, but she seemed to have collapsed due to mal-nurishment and exhaustion.” 

The Head Engineer was having some trouble understanding what he was hearing. “Mal-nurishment and exhaustion? So she wasn’t eating or sleeping?” The nurse confirmed his suspicion and he took a seat by the bed. 

“Sir, what are you doing?”

“I’m staying here. According to your chart and studies, she’ll wake up soon. When she does, I’m going to have a few words with her.”

The nurse nodded and left the room, leaving Mack and the unconscious Captain alone. He watched her, noticing how tired she actually looked. (Y/n) had dark circles under her eyes, something he hadn’t noticed before which wasn’t his fault. 

She always had that helmet on. She hid herself behind her uniform and rarely revealed herself to anyone. The last time Mack had seen (Y/n)’s face was by complete accident. He had walked in on her taking a breather in the ship’s greenhouse. After that, she seemed to be more careful not to let people see her.

“What have you been doing, (Y/n)?” He asked her unresponsive figure, not expecting a response and not receiving one. He never took his Captain to be so uncaring about her own well-being. Yes, he had heard possibly fake stories about her valor and bravery from the rest of the crew, but the unconscious figure in front of him seemed to be someone different from those tall tales.

A few minutes passed before (Y/n) woke up. She seemed disoriented, her (e/c) eyes scanning the room before settling on her helmet. Realizing she was exposed, (Y/n) reached for it weakly before noticing the IV connected to her arm.

“What the heck?”

“I wouldn’t move much if I were you. You’re going to hurt yourself or end up breaking something.”

(Y/n) recognized that voice and felt her heart skip a beat out of fear. Mack was the only one who could really scare her, though the fear came more from his potentially hurtful words than from him being there.

“Why are you here, Head Engineer?” She asked, resting her body back on the comfortable mattress. “Why are you neglecting your basic needs?” (Y/n) shot up in bed. “Wh-what?! What are you talking abou~ Woah…” She held her head as it panged painfully, her vision blurring and turning white for a few seconds before clearing up.

“I told you to stay down, also, I’m talking about something that the nurse informed me about. Why haven’t you been eating or sleeping?” (Y/n) wasn’t exactly sure of how much he actually knew and decided to play dumb. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Mack slammed his hand on the seat next to him, (Y/n) tensing in fright and the heart monitor picking up speed alongside her heart. “Cut the bullcrap, (Y/n)!” Her eyes widened and she stared at him. He never used her real name unless something was seriously wrong.

“The nurse told me that you collapsed most likely due to mal-nurishment and exhaustion. That is far too serious a matter to be playing dumb. Tell me why you’re not taking care of yourself?”

(Y/n) didn’t reply. She knew if she answered he would probably start arguing that she was “being childish” and that she wasn’t worthy of the title of Captain. If he brought up that topic again, (Y/n) feared what she would day out of anger. One wrong word or step and she could be demoted and thrown out of the air lock by her own crew, the people she worked so hard to protect on their way to the designated colonization planet. 

She didn’t even realize that tears had begun to fall in a slow river down her face until they landed on the sheets covering her lap. “And now you’re crying! What a great way to show how brave and strong and wonderful you are, Captain.” The way he said it made her want to go back into her nap-like coma. 

“If this is the way you’re going to treat yourself and keep getting knocked out, it’s probably better if I be handed the position of Captain. At least I’d get the work done without causing trouble for everyone else.”

“STOP IT! JUST STOP IT! FOR ONCE, JUST SHUT UP!!” (Y/n) covered her mouth in shock at what she just said. She knew that she’d snap, she was right, and now fat tears fell down her face even faster. Mack looked at her in shock. He had never heard her yell before, and with such words. She had always listened to everyone’s words patiently. No matter what was said, she never reacted to them in such a manner. 

She tried to cover up her uncontrollable sobs with the hands over her mouth, but Mack could still hear them. He felt bad. He wasn't used to people having a meltdown after he spoke. Knowing that he was the cause of his Captain's distress, well.. he didn't like the feelings that gave him. 

"Captain.. I-"

"No.. please," (Y/n) begged, not looking at him, and not wanting him to spit any more venom. "I can't take it anymore." 

"Can't take what? Advice and criticism?" 

"NO! You don't understand!

"Oh no, I completely understand. You're so insecure that it's getting in the way of your well being and work. How many lives are you going to risk just because you're not putting your all into your job rather than into whatever is going on in your head?!"

"BUT WHAT IF I AM??" Mack's mouth shut, no words or sounds escaping him as he looked at the now angry woman glaring at him from the medical bed. "Would that idea be too big or inconceivable to shove through that ego inflated head of yours?"

The Head Engineer moved to speak but she shushed him with a finger to his lips. 

"No, listen. I have been working myself to the bone and beyond, trying to please you. You wanted to know why I'm mal-nurished and exhausted? Well, there's your reason. I have been skipping meals, sleep, and more just to complete work that wasn't even mine, just because I didn't want to feel useless anymore. So tell me, oh high and mighty Head Engineer Mack, have I finally done enough to actually be the Captain, or do I need to up my game while you try and take my job for the upteenth time?" 

An uncomfortable silence filled the room as the two stared at each other. Neither of them wanted to back down, a second in command challenging his superior and the latter silently telling him to stand down. 

Mack frowned as he looked into (Y/n)'s tired eyes. It was true, she had been working hard, but Mack thought and believed that he could do better. He had a superiority complex, even though he would outwardly and actively reject that truth because it wasn't good for his social figure. 

But was what (Y/n) was telling him true? Did she really feel worthless, lazy, and useless all because of him? As he watched her from his seat he really took the time to notice everything about her. She was tired, very tired. Her arms were thinned and slightly boney, as if the fat was drained away. He worried that if he asked the nurse, he would discover that (Y/n)'s ribs were starting to show. 

She needed food, water, and lots of sleep. How far above and beyond was she going to go in her work if she hadn't fainted. She would be a dead girl walking. Mack had to admit, he was wrong about her. She was a real asset to the crew and a hard worker. 

He stood up to leave, slightly startling the woman as she watched him move toward the exit. "Where are you going?" 

"I'm leaving the room. You need to rest. You won't be able to work in your condition. I'll have food sent to you during the normal meal times and water is always available. Make sure you recover quickly. The ship needs its Captain." 

(Y/n)'s eyes widened and her cheeks flushed pink, much to Mack's secret delight. "Oh, and one more thing," He said, turning around in the doorway to look at her with a gentle smile.

"You are enough. Get well soon, (Y/n)."