Maybe Next Time. - Blog Posts
Bad things/violence sf has surprisingly not experienced (a compulsive list I made)
cigarette burns
tortured in a chair (but has been tied to one)
impaled
gagged (but has been muted in other ways)
tortured with pliers, nails, screws, drills or other tools (but he has been tortured with saws)
attacked by fully feral animals (but he has been mauled by intelligent feral/anthro characters)
experimented on/used as a test subject
stitched/sewn incorrectly
exposed nerves (but he has nerve damage)
struck by a vehicle
cooked/been prepared as food (but has been treated like food and eaten raw/alive)
sacrificed
probably other things I can’t think of right now
What led to the Death Eaters?
War Crimes, Vigilantes, and Dragonpox, oh my!
I just had the craziest HP au idea so bare with me.
Tom went AWOL for a decade or two where we have no clue what happened to him or what the fuck he did beyond finding Ravenclaw’s diadem.
What we do know is that before his absence the Purebloods were very comfortable in their power...but then Nobby Leach became the Minister of Magic I will find some way to squeeze him into everyone of my TMR stories mark my words somehow and suddenly the Purebloods were ready to throw down upon TMR’s return.
I personally headcanon that some sort of Muggleborn rights movement occured in this time frame that led to Leach’s ascent but I honestly don’t think that would be enough to result in such a drastic change.
There’s also no way Tom wouldn’t have wanted to get in on some of that chaos if he knew it would help him later.
Before I get into where the vigilante part comes in I should also probably share my other au idea for the Grindelwald-WW2 overlap. I think that some of the Purebloods took advantage of the chaos that arose from the bombings, the fighting, and the imprisonment going on in the Muggle World to hide their own war crimes. What kind of war crimes? Well that depends on how angsty you want it to get.
Could this happen in canon? Probably not given how ignorant most Purebloods are to the Muggle World but it is an idea to play around with that they’re not all as ignorant as they pretend to be. Arthur Weasley just can not be the most informed Pureblood on Muggle matters because I would have no fic ideas otherwise.
Anyway, they could use WW2 as a cover to do away with Muggles, Squibs, and Muggleborns in a manner that would go unnoticed. These raids also serve as a precursor to the Death Eater’s later strategies of attacking head on with violence rather than subtly in the courtroom. It makes much more sense for them to go this route later if they had recent evidence it had worked for them before. Purebloods are all about tradition and playing it safe; why would they take risks on an unknown?
Tom Riddle is the perfect victim for Purebloods during WW2: he’s in London during The Blitz, he’s an orphan, a presumed Muggleborn, and he’s in Slytherin despite all of this. The Purebloods take offense to this. The audacity of this kid to want a place to belong, shocker. People in actual history have killed or done worse for less than this.
Obviously, their attempts didn’t work otherwise Harry Potter would be very different. Tom survived with an extra dose of trauma and knows the Purebloods are actively unaliving (or worse) random children and getting away with it. And now he has to go back to Hogwarts and pretend like his housemates didn’t ask their parents to do the same to him. But he’s fine. Everything’s fine.
This is where Vigilante Tom comes in. Once the war was over and the Purebloods no longer had a cover to hide their criminal activities they had to get subtle. I mean they could stop but they’ve gotten away with it so far, what could go wrong?
Tom. Tom and all of the Muggleborns they failed to get rid of. And they are here to make it everyone’s problem.
While the Muggleborns and Leach vibe check the Wizarding World, Tom throws down in the background dismantling the Pureblood crime syndicate.
The Purebloods find this terrifying. They’re being attacked on two fronts: the public and the private. The Muggleborns attack their credibility and power, but Tom straight up attacks whoever he finds and kills without mercy. Suddenly, their power no longer makes them untouchable. The Muggleborns don’t know about Tom but the Purebloods don’t know that they don’t know. They also don’t know if the Muggleborns do know.
To be safe, the Purebloods keep the situation with Tom underwraps. They control the newspapers so nothing is printed that even vaguely mentions him. Neither do the Purebloods mention him aloud. He’s the You-Know-Who to anyone who knows am I right? HA. Okay I’ll shut up now.
But what they can not hide is the frankly concerning number of Pureblood deaths. Luckily they have a solution ready to go.
Haven’t you heard? Dragonpox is terrible this time of year.
Yes I know there’s technically a cure for it in canon, this is an au, let me dream. The phrase becomes code for ‘oh yeah they were absolutely unalived by You-Know-Who.’ (Except they didn’t know who otherwise they never would’ve joined his cult)
So the Purebloods are spooked on both fronts when Nobby Leach becomes Minister for Magic and Tom continues to dismantle their criminal underground. They are desperate, scared, furious, vengeful, and ready to rumble. But how are they going to-oh hey that You-Know-Who guy is gone yay! And so is Nobby Leach. I guess we can chill now-
And then before they can simmer down, some guy shows up who knows exactly what to say to get them fired up again.
And no Pureblood connected the dots until years later when Voldemort visited Abraxas Malfoy on his deathbed and spilled the beans. Too bad he never got to tell anyone! Dragonpox is terrible this time of year afterall.
GOOD LIRD I FINALLY FINISHED THIS
Finnally a proper references for my agent headcanons hurray. “Nakey” version + other info under the cut (looking you with eyes, you will read everything)
Timeline for this is Sara and Cube post RotM, Mars and Eight with their splat2 outfits but beginning of splat3 appearences (i was too lazy to come up with clothes lol)
Sara
-23 years old
-Top left side of her head is permanently scared due to direct contact wih sanitized ink. Has permanent blury vision on her left eye, moderate hearing loss on her left ear and pain on her left shoulder.
-His hands and feet got hit by significant amounts of fuzzy ooze while cutting it all down. This is why he wasnt able to keep going 👍 (no bones for an ankle to be broken uknow)
-Says the most unserious of things in the most serious tone, seems like theyre joking but its always from their heart
-Sees themselves a lot in Cube and takes care of it and gives it advice contantly. Offered Cube to go live with them after their mission was over but Cube refused
-Knows a little bit of octarian, hes trying his best but has a unique way of mispronouncing words
Mars
-22
-Very clumsy during his 1st time as an agent so he has lots of scars because of that
-Scars on his right side are from a bomb explosion gone very wrong
-After splat2 she grew her hair out and styled it to match Maries a bit
-Lives in a shared apartment with Sara and sometimes Eight
-Was catching up with her high school missed agent years and is now studing some general science/space-based course 👍 he like space a lot
-Was very mad and very upset and very sad he was not the one choosen to be sent into space to save the earth
-Fluent in octarian, also knows a bit of salmonling
Eight
-22
-Her weird spots are a reaction from perlonged exposure to a sanitized environment, the bigget her spots are the better, the smaller the worse. She sometimes wakes up with random pains, especially in her right arm and back
-Lives with Pearl and Marina post OE, also spents a loooottt of time at 4 and 3s place
-Fluent in inklish but has a funny accent
-Loves travelling with Pearl and Marina, honestly she loves travelling with anyone but her cool lesbian moms go to 100 places in a month so its a plus she gets to go with them for free
-Very good cook, is bad with deserts but shes getting better
Cube
-16
-Became a little furry tiger-ish inkling due to prolonged exposure to fuzzy ooze. Unlike Sara it is less fuzzy, its just spread all around its body
-Cannot change into squid form and produces ink very slowly in a small amount, limiting its capacitie of participating in ink related sports.
-Scavanged the deserts around splatsville for trinkets to sell in 2nd hand markets and fairs. Meet with Deep Cut once or twice during that period, hence their pre-assumption that it was gonna steal the stuff for itself
-In their free time they used to participate in turf wars. They considered doing salmon runs but found it extremelly wrong and immorall
-Little buddy was a salmonid that wanted to see more of the world so they snuck into, a very distracted, workers hat. Lucky for them that worker was very friendly, and tired of grizzcos work, so they showed little buddy all around splatsville and its deserts and even a beach. They quickly beacame friends and are inseparable now
-It knows salmonling wowow
-Maths fan, number one stan of geometry and shapes
-Tableturf card collector
-Lives in a too-big of an apartment with the squid sisters
-Goes to school now hurray!!
-Visits Sara a lot, doesnt spent much time there as Eight but does show up unannounced
Suspense music, relatioship thang:
Sara
About Mars; My friend, my one and only. I can count on her for everything. I do have to keep an eye out for her extreme clumsiness
About Eight; I wish i got to spent more time with her. Shes very fun and makes me feel at home when shes around.
About Cube; Was this how Callie and Marie felt when i joined the splatoon? Fun kid, has to stop stepping on metal.
Mars
Sara; oh Sara my good friend Sara. We ding dong ditch together, our neighbours hate us but they dont know that. (also i dont think she realizes were dating....)
Eight; oooo my love kiss kiss muah muah
Cube; funny kid, does need to make up for not inviting me to space with them. Im joking, i love it and the little rocks it gives me.
Eight
Sara; Hes very unserious! You would think behind her intimidating looks is someone thats shy and reserved but she has the wildests things to say sometimes, shes very funny i like her a lot (we need to talk to her abt that, you cannot keep assuming things Mars...)
Mars; There is not a single conversation with you where i dont laugh my heart out. Thank you for the butterflies in my stomach head and eyes
Cube; It comes into our house, it eats all the food, it gives a long detailed compliment, it leaves. Interesting child i guess.
Cube
Sara; Seemed very intimitading at first but i think shes just worries about me but hey! i can take care of myself fine
Mars; i like to give her animal shaped rocks and crystals.
Eight; I haven't talked or seen her a lot but she cooks so well
o wow you read it all congrats! you have the right to 1 (one) drawing request ;) and if you have anything to ask please do, talking abt headcanons and stuff makes me develop characters faster and its fun :]
I'm only like a week late, hopefully ya'll don't mind