PROMPTS FROM SHREK * assorted dialogue from the 2001 film, adjust as necessary
two things, okay? shut... up.
you didn't slay the dragon?
some of you may die... but it's a sacrifice i am willing to make.
they judge me before they even know me. that's why i'm better off alone.
how will you kiss me?
that wasn't in the job description!
what is so funny?
let's just say... i'm not your type.
pick me! pick me!
i've got a dragon and i'm not afraid to use it!
now really, it's rude enough being alive when no one wants you, but showing up uninvited to a wedding?
it's a compliment! better out than in, i always say.
you can't tell me you're afraid of heights.
let's do that again!
what's that? it's hideous.
only a true friend would be that cruelly honest!
well, technically, you're not a king.
the battle is won.
so where is this fire-breathing pain in the neck, anyway?
hey, don't look at me. i didn't invite them.
it's on my to-do list!
you're meant to charge in, sword drawn, banners flying!
that's not the point!
huh, celebrity marriages. they never last, do they?
that'll do, [name]. that'll do.
you're going the right way for a smacked bottom.
well, that's not very nice. it's just a donkey.
where are you going? the exit's over there!
i have to save my ass.
what kind of a knight are you?
i was talking about the dragon.
man, this would be so much easier if i wasn't color-blind.
we can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning... i'm making waffles!
whoa, look at that. who'd wanna live in a place like that?
that... would be my home.
i think i need a hug.
you're a monster!
we were forced to come here!
you know, you're really quite a decorator!
it's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget!
i like that boulder. that is a nice boulder.
you know, not everybody likes onions.
everybody loves cake!
i don't care what everyone likes!
have you ever met a person, you say, "let's get some parfait," they say, "hell no, i don't like parfait."
end of story! bye bye! see ya later!
parfaits may be the most delicious thing on the whole damn planet!
it talks?
i'm not the monster here, you are!
now tell me, where are the others!
eat me!
i've tried to be fair to you creatures, but now my patience has reached its end.
all right then! who's hiding them?
oh you're going to love it there.
men of his stature are in short supply.
it's getting him to shut up that's the trick!
hey, what's your problem [name], what you got against the whole world anyway, huh?
i'll find those stairs.
look, i'm not the one with the problem, okay? it's the world that seems to have a problem with me.
do you think he's maybe compensating for something?
hey, where're you going?
oh man, i can't feel my toes!
take a look at me. what am i?
doesn't that bother you?
man, i like you. what's your name?
you're so wrapped up in layers, onion boy, you're afraid of your own feelings.
there you are, doing it again!
oh... oh this is all my fault.
you can't do this to me! i'm too young for you to die!
you gotta warn somebody before you just crack one off, my mouth was open and everything.
believe me, if it was me... you'd be dead.
i steal from the rich and give to the needy.
man, that was annoying.
i was sent to rescue you.
i'm supposed to be rescued by my true love!
your job is not my problem.
you love this woman, don't you?
i don't want to rush into a physical relationship.
like that's ever gonna happen!
why are you following me?
stop singing!
it's no wonder you don't have any friends!