Study Struggles - Blog Posts

Hi, I'm back again!

School has been intense recently, but I've (mostly) caught up with everything, so it should be smooth sailing for a few weeks now!

Speaking of sailing, and boats, and books, of course, I've started annotating my copy of Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness for school. Hopefully rereading it won't be so confusing as the initial reading was.

The other photo above are of my notes on William Blake's poem The Little Black Boy, or rather notes on the essay Liberatory Christianity and the Perception of Race in "TLBB".

What I got done today:

Literature notes.

Literature annotating.

Biology revision.

Also, I apologise for my rather bad quality photos. Whenever I write these posts (or think about writing them) I always wish my camera was a little more sharp, or my skills a little more intuitive. It always quietly amazes me how study bloggers can manage to capture such beautiful shots.

But I suppose my own stumbling efforts do have their own unique flair; a sense of personal authenticity to them, that reflects the imperfect and the mundane, mirroring back the glamourless way life (and studying) so often plays out.

Well.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you're productive this week!

Pre-exam mood swings are kicking in again🤦🏼‍♀️📈📉📈

I went through everything and on the one side I'm pretty sure I can do it and ace this exam, on the other side I'm not sure how I'm going to remember all this information tomorrow...

Aaah, it's a vicious circle!😩

It’s very gloomy and rainy these days… It’s hard to keep up with my agenda, because the bad weather has a huge negative impact on my motivation😵‍💫 But I’m still trying my best!!✨💗

When we all scroll through Tumblr pinterest Instagram etc we all see tidy desks, beautifully written lessons, revision sessions in nice cafes. But can we show the chaos that revision often represents? While romanticising our studies is enjoyable and can even be motivating, it's important to remember that most people don't work like that and still succeed. So here's my revision chaos 4 days before the start of my exams: binders everywhere, even on the floor, barely legible sheets of rough paper and my flat untidy due to lack of time. Yes, the greatest difficulty in studying is the lack of time, so don't focus on the aesthetics of your lessons, but above all on understanding them and making them interesting.

I guess Cesar doesn’t like geology…

I've been working on a research project for a few months and I've just sent my first results to my teachers. I'm very proud of myself but also very stressed about their opinions.

It's the first project I've done on my own, so it's far from perfect, but it's a start.

My biggest flex ? Using Saltburn and quotes Jacob Elordi in my french essay 🫡

Gradually falling back in love with studying 🫶

Doing organic chemistry always helps me enjoy what I study

7 hours of work today, my eyes are starting to sting but at least I've been productive (which proves that working with stress is effective).

J-5 before exams

Exam season = chaos

(Actually I have exams every weeks so it’s always chaos)

Remember when I said in high school that I wanted to do a difficult degree to push my limits? I take back everything I said, let me sleep and have a social life.

Crying in front of mechanics or mathematics was not my idea of how I was going to spend my evenings as a university student…

More alcohol and fewer theorems would be better

Thanks to the person who thought it was more fun to add a letter instead of a number. Thanks to you, I have to study for days just to do a silly little equation without a number.

If I don’t answer tomorrow don’t worry I will probably just cry for bit because of my math exam.

I literally chose difficult studies (one of the most difficult courses in my country) to go beyond my limits, and I have the audacity to complain when it's actually beyond my limits.

It's only been two days since I returned to class and I'm already behind on work? Like how?

Am I procrastinating from reading my books for school while reading other books? Yes. will I regret it? probably. am I going to stop doing it? Never.

rant coming up because why not

so i feel like im sucking at the whole "college experience" thing

i haven't hit rock bottom in terms of my academics but im so SO scared that i might. istg college level assignments are no joke and I FEEL LIKE IM ALWAYS LACKING UGH

i haven't participated in any clubs or committees or any student activities. either because whenever there's smtg, im tired or because im undermining/second guessing my skills.

LMAO recently ive also been thinking that im just plain talentless like everyone has their 'thing'. what's my thing? nothing. there's nothing that i can confidently say is my thing.

yeah my self esteem has taken a hit after coming here.

i keep comparing myself to one of my friends and honestly im envious of how she's actually experiencing college and how involved in the clubs/activities she is. and she's so funny, bubbly and smart and everyone likes her.

okay that's it for the rant, ill be fine eventually (atleast that's how i pacify myself). maybe others also feel the way i do, maybe my friend feels this way too and i just don't know it🤷