Very True - Blog Posts
quick thought:
when it's too much for jokes, leo's stress response tends towards total silence
like when they got stuck in the turtle tank in cloak and swaggart, leo's method of freaking out is Floor
no witty banter with shredder. after a final oneliner, barely reacts to anything in the prison dimension... only starts speaking again when he sees his brothers...
hm. hum. thinking of him...
I hate people who call me. I don’t have a phone so you can reach me, I have a phone so I can read fanfic on the bus.
Alright, I need to have a chat with the teenagers that follow me, specifically regarding lying about your age and nsfw content. This isn’t directed at anyone, but I think it’s a convo that needs to be had in general.
I was a teenager once. I get it. Everyone lies about their age online. Maybe not to other people, but I’m sure every minor has clicked a ‘yeah, sure, I’m 18+” button at some point in their lives. I’m not here to shame you for that.
What I am here to say is it is vital that teenagers understand the difference between engaging in sexual content independently (ie, entering a fake birthday to access 18+ content), and lying about your age to engage in sexual activities with others online (joining discord servers/using nsfw channels intended for adults only/lying about your age to talk to nsfw content creators/commissioning nsfw art/etc).
Lying about your age to a website so you can look at porn is one thing. It’s an entirely independent experience, where the only consent that really matters is yours. Nobody has any power over you in this situation, and there’s about no chance of legal consequences.
However, lying about your age to other human beings is extremely different. If you’re engaging in nsfw roleplay with a friend about the same age as you, talking about sex with other teenagers, sharing nsfw fics among friends, that’s one thing. But do not lie about your age to engage in sexual activities/discussions. Not only is something that could have actual legal ramifications, and very serious ones depending on what’ going on, but it’s a violation of the other people’s consent. The moment other real people are involved, you need to be respectful of their boundaries & what is and isn’t appropriate for you to be engaging with. If they say no minors, I don’t care if you’re 17.5, you stay out until you are 18 years old.
Examples of situations where it is never okay to lie or mislead anyone about your age online include:
Joining/accessing nsfw channels or servers on discord.
Yes, I know it’s very easy to just click that little red button on discord that lets you access the channel you’re so curious about. It looks just like the one you see on adult websites that you click without thinking.
Don’t do it.
If channels are 18+ then you stay out of them. There are other real life human beings involved who did not give consent to have a minor in an adult orientated space.
Engaging with nsfw creators/content directly
ie, commissioning nsfw artwork, following or talking to nsfw creators who’ve asked for no interactions from minors/flagged their accounts as 18+ only, subscribing to nsfw creators on patron, nsfw roleplay, etc.
Joining/engaging with adult only communities, like Fetlife or cam sites.
Engaging in romantic and/or sexual online relationships
Any time you are talking with one or more other real human beings, particularly any adults, in a sexual context.
I know that adult websites have basically trained teenagers to just say they’re 18 and move on, but it is vital that teenagers understand that it is never okay to lie about your age when directly engaging in any kind of sexual activity. Knowing people’s age is a vital part of consent, and if an adult is found to have been engaging in sexual activity with a minor, they could face life long legal consequences. Not only that, but a basic facet of consent is clear, honest communication. If you are lying to a partner, then you do not have consent. Lying about your age is a huge violation of consent.
That’s not to say you can never mention sex around adults online. There are times and places where you may be asking for advice, or even just making jokes about sex or whatever. That’s all well and good, so long as everyone is on the same page. It’s on adults to make sure that we are behaving appropriately around minors online, and make sure that we’re setting boundaries in those relationships. But it’s on minors to communicate that they are minors, and respect those boundaries that are set.
So, tl;dr,
Lying about your age to access a porn site is fine. Lying about your age to engage in sexual situations/adult-only spaces where other real human beings are involved is not.
genuinely it is much better to let yourself feel bad when things creative wise doesn’t do well and remind yourself that it’s okay to feel like this just don’t let it determine your value instead of allowing it to put you in some creative burnout hole
“ooh i’m getting all my tattoos removed bc tattoos aren’t cool anymore they’re out of style and no longer match my aesthetic” i’m not gonna mince words anymore if you got tattoos because they were a cool aesthetic and not because you actually wanted them then you’re a fucking idiot
"liking does absolutely nothing" incorrect, i see the little notification sometimes when i log in and bother to check and i go "aw, someone saw the thing i posted and enjoyed it"
i am also a fan of kudos on ao3.
active promotion is great but you know what, low-effort signals of enjoyment are also nice.
online communities are so strange because people slip away so easily. you can be on here for years, folding people you've never met into the fabric of your daily life, and then they disappear, leaving only ghost posts scattered across tumblr behind. or their blog stays dormant, for weeks, months, years, until you're only still following them because you remember that they love sunflowers or they were kind to you when they didn't have to be or the last thing they posted was sad and raw and you still worry about them sometimes.
and sometimes they come back when you least expect it, years later, even, and there's this sudden rush of relief like there you are, there you are, even though you barely knew each other.
there's a strange kind of love to it. i don't know you and i want to hold your hand across miles and time zones and oceans. i can still see the imprint of you in this community you left. you don't think anyone will notice or care when you're gone, but we notice and we care and we wish you well.
i hope you're all okay out there. i hope the sun is shining on your face and you are breathing deeply. i miss you.
looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:
dont care
dont care
dont care
what the actual fuck
dont care
ooh that sounds- what the fuck
unfinished
don't care
the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again
dont care
the trenchcoat I bought because of castiel supernatural in my closet rn calling to me like how the green goblin mask calls to norman osborn in spider-man.
this was revealed to me in a dream
AFFIRMATIONS
There is no shame in taking a few tries to get it right
Everyone struggles with fine motor skills from time to time
I can do fine motor activities
I can locate a port and plug in a cable
I can plug my phone in on the first try
I can plug my phone in while sober
BBC Sherlock does not exist
I can do hard things
Any idiot can like something thats good. It takes a real genius to like things that suck ass
hoo boy, here comes some serious talk about fandom mentality.
I feel like there’s a huge failing on readers’ parts to communicate to fic authors how much they appreciate their works or how much it affects them, unless the fic is “fandom famous” for some reason. sometimes it gets translated into demands (which are awful literally do not demand updates from an author ever).
more often than not, it gets translated into silence, and coming from a writer, the silence is probably the worst. you never know if they like it, you never know what the reader actually thinks about it. or even if they read it at all. and it’s… heartwrenching, and nervewracking and you start constantly questioning yourself and wondering if you’re actually good enough or if you belong. and you start comparing yourself. to the people who are popular, to the people with huge followings, to the people who get questions and art and compliments up the wazoo. and you start wondering if you should have bothered writing at all. in some cases you start begging. and in some cases, you do worse.
and it’s terrible. a writer shouldn’t have to beg. a writer shouldn’t have to only get attention when they’re frustrated or upset. a writer shouldn’t have to doubt themselves every time they pick up a pen or open their laptop. a writer should never feel so unimportant that they consider deleting their work–and do. and then be subjected to questions of why they deleted it.
(which, by the way, is kind of a rude thing to do. it’s their content, and they can do with it whatever makes them comfortable. and more than that–why wait until it’s gone to just suddenly unleash your appreciation for it?)
if, at this point, you are thinking, “well, writers shouldn’t write for attention anyway! writers should be writing for themselves!” then you are missing a Very Huge Point about the intricacies of and emotions behind creating art. of course art comes from the self, but art is meant to be shared. with people. like you. art is created for people to talk back to, to engage with, to live alongside–and yes, that in turn bolsters the creator’s own securities and motivation. it’s also a sad testament to the fact that we as a people have come to condemn the notion that anyone, especially content creators, should want attention at all.
and that’s toxic, and an awful mentality to have. (it’s also atrocious marketing. but, that’s another discussion for another time.)
what I’m trying to say here is this: a lot of this could be prevented by one simple thing. if you read a fic you like, *speak up about it.* make some kind of sign. about whether you like somebody’s work, or whether it excites you. reblog it to share with other people, gush in the tags, leave a comment/review if it’s on ao3 or ffn. (authors read tags as much as artists do, trust me.) kudos and likes are fine too, but like with any other kind of art, they’re very invisible. be vocal, y'all. spread the love.
and above all, *tell the author directly.* send them an ask, write a comment, tag them in an appreciation post. I can’t stress that enough. you’d be making someone’s day, relieving some securities, visible or not, instead of being complacent in this system, this mass way of thinking, that only popular writers deserve attention, that it has to be earned through working yourself raw instead of asked for. it causes these cliques and hierarchies and ultimately people start or keep maintaining this idea that people who are at the top deserve to be at the top, and people who get ignored deserve to be ignored. (which I have, in fact, heard people say, and that’s… I don’t even have a word for that.)
I just. something has to give, you guys. we have to stop doing this. we have to stop letting this happen. we have to be kind to our writers before they disappear.
and yes, you can reblog this post. in fact, I’d highly encourage it.
*playing Stardew Valley*
Harvey: Do you want to see my collection of model airplanes?
Me(Already taking my clothes off): Yes. Yes I do.