My Laxatives Didn’t Work Because I Took Less Than My Tolerance So I Have To Wait Until Tomorrow To

I hate myself so much I don’t feel like I’m good enough I need to be working harder, I feel like I’m so far behind and I can’t do anything right and I feel so alone.

I used to love baking before I relapsed, I really miss it. Hopefully one day, if I finally get sick enough to deserve recovery, I can start doing it again.

Currently have consumed roughly 400 cals today and my god are the binge urges killing me, I’ve also only took 10,000 steps so I am not in a negative net sadly.

Gonna take like 10+ lax then try and just go to sleep early, hopefully tomorrow will be a much more productive day !!

WHAT A WEIGHT PLATEAU REALLY IS

a weight plateau happens due to metabolic adaptation; where you have been in a calorie deficit or doing extreme diets for months without breaks and your weight isn't going anywhere. this is your body's way of protecting you or conserving energy.

a weight plateau is not rare and can happen at any time, especially once your body adapts to a certain intake. but, if you are truly in a calorie deficit, you will lose fat even if the scale shows that you're maintaining your weight.

metabolic adaptation is only a temporary response, if you follow the things down below, you'll most likely see a change and your metabolism will start to improve (with time) !!!

some things you should check if you suspect you might've hit a plateau:

✿ your water intake ❀ some people confuse a weight plateau with water retention. it is EXTREMELY important to note that water retention CAN cause the scale to maintain and can cause you to look "bulky" or "fat". make sure you're staying hydrated and drinking at least 2-4 bottles of water daily !!! i promise there will be a major difference.

✿ start tracking your calories for a few days (if you haven't been doing that already) ❀ this one is obvious. but sometimes we're prone to underestimating our meals or forgetting things we've eaten throughout the day. sometimes it's just out of plain embarrassment, where we're too ashamed to write it down. but it is super important to document everything you've eaten, especially if it's to see if you're truly in a plateau or if it's just miscalculations. if you're not into calorie counting, then portion control can be a good alternative.

✿ start exercising ❀ it doesn't have to be anything extreme, just moving your body might help. it doesn't matter if you get 4k steps or do a 10 minute video, all movement is good movement and might help break your plateau.

✿ while on the topic of exercise, make sure the exercises that you're doing aren't causing muscle gain. ❀ i have pcos and it doesn't help that due to my genetics, i tend to build muscle extremely easily as well. when i do exercises like cycling or leg pilates or any exercise in general that engages one point of muscles too much, they start to appear bulky after a few days and the scale ends up maintaining or going up. i've learned that just walking at a moderate pace is what works best for me and ever since i stopped cycling, the scale started dropping and i've gotten skinnier. with that being said, find out if your exercises are the reason for the scale maintaining, pay close attention to measurements and/or before and after photos, and check for symptoms of pcos if you suspect you have it!

✿ if none of these are the culprit, then it's definitely time for a metabolism/refeed day (or week... or month) ❀ eat somewhere close to your maintenance (TDEE) for a few days and then after some time you can start restricting again… that way your weight on the scale will start dropping.

❀ if you want to avoid these plateaus in the future, it's important to implement at least 1 or 2 metabolism days a week AND follow everything that i mentioned before !!

❀ it should be noted that you do not have to have metabolism days, sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. it honestly just depends on the person. like for me, i've stayed around the same calorie intake since december 2024. i was steadily losing weight until one day the scale kept maintaining in february 2025 despite doing my workouts and being in my deficit. it was only until i started upping my water intake is when the scale started dropping again. i barely had to do any refeed days. however, this isn't guaranteed to work for another person. it all just depends on how your body reacts so do whatever works best for your body ♡

Going to the movies with my friend tonight so I’m just gonna have a monster until then, and OMAD a little bit of popcorn/snacks we get there and hope and pray I have enough discipline not to go overboard with it :)

STUPID BMI CALCULATOR KEEPS TELLING ME IM HEALTHY

Yall update on the hot cross bun situation, it was so disappointing I should’ve gotten a different one because this one tasted like ass it literally just tasted like a regular brioche bun and I regret OMAD’ing it 😔💔

Just broke my fast and I regret it so much, I feel sick why do I do this to myself

I had my mum measure my height yesterday and she said I was 171 cm, and I just weighed myself and I’m 52.2kg meaning that I could be bmi 17.9 but I’m scared that she mis measured me and I’m still 170cm and stuck in bmi 18 jail 😔

Update on the sushi situation from last night, I did end up eating it and something else which I deeply regret although if my calculations were right with the sushi I did stay under 500 cals. I hate how easily I gave into desire, I feel like I have no discipline whatsoever. To make up for breaking my fast early I’m going to fast for the entire weekend and maybe Monday, and work out even harder. God I hate myself.