Arin ＊*•✩•*˚ The Fifth Season (ssfwl) Stages

LMFAO like an idiot ,, i made a mistake ... jina is already 19 and she should be turning 20 this year bc ... Guess who forgot the rp is in 2020 ,,,, but anyways i’ve gotten to all my msgs and i’ll be sending out messages to those who’ve liked this post !! 

hi guys !! i’m ume (21+, pst!) and this is another one of kwak jidam’s unfortunate children !!! ( i’m kidding but rly not their whole family is a lit revolt and we LOVE it ) aka kwak jina, she’s the second to last child and she’s turning 19 in lit 3 days so we going for Legal Turn ups in a quick sec! there’s more info under the cut as well as plots but pls like and i’ll definitely jump into your dms for some quick one on one 🤪🤪🤪

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BUDDING PARALLELS

similar but not quite the same, virtually so; but frankly, not enough. see also: jina and @mmyuanlan before the peace treaty, the glo-up, and insert the manic one on one competition between the two smartest girls in their cohort. CIRCA 2017

𝐀𝐓 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍, you want to be better than the rest. 

you read books until they’re practically imprinted in your mind. you close your eyes and your mind still runs a mile a minute, keep up, keep up -- they taunt you. you’re to be the best, not ahead of the curve, you are the curve. self-awareness is second to self-egos; pampered and bruised. tossed to wolves and torn apart all for the sake of an outstanding academic reputation. the next day, it will begin again.

it’s a repetitive cycle, the slate is never clean, it’s darkened with blood and sweat and tears jina never cries because her eyes are bloodshot and her smile is strained. but she raises her hand high, shoulder brush, maybe a little too passive-aggressively against another’s. she doesn’t spare the slightest glance backwards as her name is spoken like a spell, like it’s obvious that she would be the first to come up with the answer. 

like it’s expected, because she was kwak jina. 

this was her reputation. untainted by her mother’s crimes, unhindered by the legacies her sisters unravel: no -- kwak jina is unlike her sisters before her. she is not serious, she is not fun personified; she’s not a breath of fresh air nor does she excel at escapism. 

she’s haughty, possessive, temperamental and withers at the lack of attention. above all, she is an egoist. she wants to be the best, second in line had never been her frame of work nor would she bow down to someone like -- she blinks, smile ripe against bright teeth -- someone like yuanlan. the name rolls off her tongue as she stares at the list of students, written off by examination scores and paired like cattle for their latest DADA practicum. unlike last time, perhaps the advantage had been lost.

because right next to yuanlan’s was her own -- she bites back a groan, heavily feeling her eyes roll to the back of her head as she turns to stare the other down, arms crossed before she makes up her mind and makes the first move. “it appears,” she breathes through her nose, trying to calm the flares of annoyance already prickling at the back of her neck. “the professor thought it was wise to pair us up for today’s practicum.” her tone is flat, a declaration of if you fuck this up -- i’ll fuck you up whispered between unwritten lines. 

send a symbol - get the following from my muse ;

letters to: unknown address

TW subtle depressive thoughts

dear jihye,

why did you leave? we were supposed to stick together.

                                                                                                    jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

you may ask me why am i writing this letter? because you never answer your fucking phone. next time you drop off the face of the earth, send a forwarding address and maybe a working phone number so we’re not all worrying our asses off thinking you’re dead in a ditch somewhere. jesus, jihye.

                                                                                                       jina

                                                  ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

writing letters in the 21st century? what are we starved romanticists? please pick up your phone and text me back.

                                                                                      sincerely, jina

                                                  ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

it actually pains me to pick up a pen and write this. we are living and breathing in a world with the most efficient technological advances and you’re seriously making me break out archaic methods in order to talk to you. 

i hate this, you better answer. 

miss you.

                                                                                     sincerely, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

it’s been 210 days since i’ve last seen or heard from you. yes, i’m keeping count. i miss you, dearly, and this house is a mess, as always. but i feel like it’d be less of a mess if you were here. or maybe even messier, who knows, really. 

junsu is still the same dickhead, jimin 언니 is awol as always, jieun 언니 is off being mom’s little trophy daughter and jungmi 언니 is making headlines with her new column in playwitch, who knew writing for perverts could be so lucrative? i’m kidding, at least it was better than her sex toy advice. if you get playwitch where you are, make sure you pick up this month’s copy! i’m lowkey tempted to post it onto my story. 

have you seen my stories lately? 

                                                                 love always, your sister, jina

                                                   ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

how are you? where are you now? is it los angeles or new york? or even paris? the post cards you send to junsu always look so much more inviting than the ones you send me. i don’t burn them, you know. i want to but .... just knowing you’re safe somewhere kind of comforts me. 

please send me more, please let me know you’re safe.

                                                               love always, your sister, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

update: i slapped jieun 언니 at the party today. i don’t regret it but everyone is telling me i should apologize because i was the one in the wrong. but 언니, if you heard what she was saying .... i swear you’d go crazy too ... they’re all a bunch of ignorant greedmongers that it’s just nauseating to listen to and i snapped, okay? ugh, i don’t want to apologize but ...

i fucked up didn’t i?

                                                                       tell me what to do, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

it’s getting cold here in seoul. i wish i was somewhere tropical like boracay or bali. tell me where you are so we can go together ❤︎

                                                               love always, your sister, jina

                                                ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

i need advice: what’s it feel like to fall in love?

                                                               love always, your sister, jina

                                                ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

i just wanted to let you know i won the running for the fourth year class representative. it was a landslide, can you believe it?

are you proud of me?

                                                               love always, your sister, jina

                                               ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

update: love sucks. it sucks, it sucks, it sucks. 

                                                              love always, your sister, jina

                                               ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

언니, something happened. please contact me asap.

                                                                                    it’s urgent, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

the new season of produce started and why is it always the untalented ones that are the cutest? is it something about not being able to sing a tune that just becomes my siren song? is that dramatic or gross? 

maybe it’s because i know i’d carry the weight in the relationship either way, hm.

                                                                love always, your sister, jina

                                                  ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

i wish you took me with you, i’m slowly seeing the colors of my life fade to black and i don’t know who to tell. i feel like you’d understand, but you’re not here.

you’re never here.

write back, please.

                                                               love always, your sister, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

you know how gretchen weiners said why didn’t everyone just stab caesar? well that’s my Mood today or everyday. missing you again today, have you gotten my last letter, by the way?

                                                                love always, your sister, jina

                                                 ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

i’m not fine, and it’s starting to get harder to pretend i am. i feel so much uncontrollable anger swell up within me and i can’t stop it when i let it out. i can see the people around me grow to hate me more and more and i can’t do anything to stop that. maybe i’m careless, too nonchalant, maybe i can do something but what would be the use?

they’re so used to me being this way, maybe it’s better off that i’m hated.

what do you think, 언니?

                                                                                       sincerely, jina

                                                ・    ・    ・

dear jihye,

it’s been a year, when are you coming back?

                                                                                 let me know, jina

mmjunsu‌:

it was funny how things could fall into place so easily; how things could pick up from where they left off, without any thought of the circumstances prior.

(like how he’d shared an uncharacteristically emotional reunion with his sister; and then he was sitting at the kitchen island moments later, stuffing his puffy face with breakfast as she slipped back out into obscurity. don’t mention it to anyone just yet, she’d made him promise, but it seemed like the idea was already obliterated as he burned his tongue on seaweed soup).

and things went back to normal, like always.

maybe he should’ve taken it as a sign, when he walked into the apartment and was greeted with absolute silence— like the calm before the storm, it lulled him into a false sense of security as he kicked off his shoes comfortably and left a trail of his belongings on his way to the rec room.

maybe he should’ve been more cautious when he found a full, unopened bag of shrimp crackers and pepero sticks— a rarity in the kwak household— and it seemed like the stars were all aligned for him when he opened the fridge and his favourite banana milk was stocked on the top shelf.

(ahjumma must’ve gone shopping, was what he had thought, when he should’ve realized: ahjumma had bought him his last meal).

the alignment of the stars were clear now as kwak junsu took a fistful of shrimp crackers as he paused his video game, and the doorknob twisted open to reveal the grim reaper.

junsu could easily recognize the stages of kwak jina’s wrath, but the look she gave him from the threshold as he stared back at her with doe-eyes wide open and mouth agape, was positively lethal.

it felt like an eternity as he wracked his brain for the things he could’ve done wrong, a single  cracker from the bunch in his fist falling down into his lap.

(after quickly assessing and reassessing his memory, kwak junsu found that he didn’t know what it was his sister was staring at him like she would kill him for, but after sixteen years of being the youngest, he quickly moved on to his second option: run).

“noona, hold up—”

the shrimp crackers all fell to the floor as kwak junsu tossed the game controller to the side, jumping up onto the couch and stumbling as he tripped over his own lanky legs. he tripped over the edge and quickly shot back up as he hid behind the couch: his only line of defense from kwak jina’s blazing stare.

𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐓𝐇 𝐁𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐋𝐃, jina has two different type of aggressions. it wasn’t out of norm for one of them to be tickled on the daily. that one didn’t involve the throbbing of a vein against the very shell of her forehead, it didn’t include the rush of adrenaline into her bloodstream nor did it reap of deadly intentions. 

no, that one was harmless in comparison to the aggression she felt swelling against her conscience. the one telling her that poor, innocent junsu looked scared to death. that perhaps, he didn’t deserve jina whatever jina had in store for settling whatever had set her off today.

of course her conscience was an idiot.

and jina full-heartedly believed whatever intentions she had in mind were rightfully just. especially when she was mad.

but no, jina wasn’t just mad -- she was pissed. 

she, of course, was fair in her approach. far more than she thinks she should have been. maybe she was feeling merciful, or maybe she just enjoyed the way her little brother seemed a second close to shitting himself. she didn’t enjoy scaring him, but the fear in his eyes did give her a different type of high.

for now, she feels every type of emotion welling up within her. remnants of her conversation ( if you could call a screaming match in the middle of the courtyard a ‘conversation’ ) with jihye still fresh on the skin. the tears she had cried a dried up path to where blurred eyeliner and smudged mascara lay. the obviousness of her distress a second contender for the anger that blazed in her eyes was much more prevalent, obvious in the way she stalked into the rec room; fingers pushing the door open further to make her way inside. 

“why are you backing up, junnie?” she blinks, voice a notch softer than it should be; coupled by the innocence dripping from her tone and the nickname she hardly uses, jina tilts her head. the venom in her expression says enough to warrant the activation of the fight or flight instinct, this she is sure -- watching his expression react in comparison has jina taking another step closer. “did you do something wrong?” 

she takes one more step, fingers reaching out to grab the discarded controller, tinkering with the buttons, a single glance made to the device before her glare returns to him. 

“don’t you have something to tell me?” timbre is soft, a false sense of security lulled into her voice as she takes another step closer; grasp tightening against the controller with each step before stopping just short of the couch he hid behind.

if he wanted to run, she’d give him a head start. 

REPERCUSSIONS

⎣   곽𝐉𝐈𝐍𝐀   ⎤   ━━━━   yes & no  xylo   /   queen  loren gray   /  bad things  meiko   /   you should see my in a crown  billie eilish   /   kill of the night  gin wigmore   /   primadonna  marina & the diamonds   /   control  halsey   /   bad guy  billie eilish   /   all the king’s horses  karmina   /   breathe  fluerie   /   deep end  ruelle   /   hurts like hell fluerie   /   someone to stay   vancouver sleep clinic   /   sorry  halsey   /   the truth untold  bts   /   i can’t make you love me  dave thomas jr   /   house of cards  bts   /   all good girls go to hell  billie ellish  ━━  ・  𝑆𝑂, 𝖳𝖱𝖤𝖠𝖳 𝖬𝖤 𝖫𝖨𝖪𝖤 𝖠 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐄𝐍  .

♔ ♠ ☏ ☠ ✘ (( 👀i'm late to the party but i couldn't resist ))

   ●   a angry text     ━━━   ・  

⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  18:46  ›   OKAY 언니 I GAVE YOU THE DRESS TO WEAR NOT TO PUKE ON⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  18:46  ›   the dry cleaner place you went to is horrible⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  18:50  ›   HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO COUTURE

   ●   a drunk text     ━━━   ・  

⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:01  ›   언니 언니 언니 언니 언니 언니 !!!!⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:01  ›   i pnked on yoda⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:02  ›   ffs⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:02  ›   darth vader is aFTER ME

    a vague text     ━━━   ・

⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:18  ›   fuck world peace

   ●   a misguided advice text     ━━━   ・

⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  21:32  ›   learning to puke your brains out does wonders on my self esteem

   ●   a  text that should have never been sent  ━━━   ・

⁺  💬  ›  ☢️DISASTER언니☢️.  ›  00:54  ›   will you ever tire of one night fuck ups?

✆ ♠ ☼

   ●   a morning text     ━━━   ・  

⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  08:00  ›   good morning 선배님⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  08:01  ›   i know it’s early⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  08:05  ›   but are you in the student council office? ⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  08:06  ›   i have a few questions to ask you 👉👈

   ●   a drunk text     ━━━   ・  

⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  00:02  ›   text 0009 to claim a real hippogriff⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  00:03  ›   gIVE mEA MY HIAPPOGYF⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  00:05  ›   IW WANT IT NOW⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  00:05  ›   gimme⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.  ›  00:05  ›   🤲

   ●   a congratulatory text     ━━━   ・

⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.   ›  14:05  ›   선배님 !!!!!!⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.   ›  14:05  ›   i won the vote for class rep !!!⁺  💬  ›  ⭐️혜진 선배님 LEGEND.   ›  14:05  ›   aren’t you going to congratulate me?  🥺

⁺  𝐖𝐈𝐙𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌   @jina5  .

jina calls her instagram a glorified photobook of ‘candids’, exclusively utilizing the ‘candid’ aesthetic whereas most, if not all, the pictures are more ‘posed’ rather than in the moment or actually candid. she rarely takes or posts selfies, and almost always either has someone taking the picture for her or is behind the camera, herself. half the pics are taken with a film camera while the other half are by her phone, using a ‘film’ filter to give it that aesthetic. apparently the only perk (that she happily exploits) of having a maesoba-loved mother is that her follower count is a lot higher than it realistically should be.